Letter to Stephenie Meyer: Bree- really?

Upon hearing the news that Stephenie Meyer wrote a book about Bree, @Brookelockart, Moon & myself quickly began an email conversation to speculate what was UP with this news. Brookie was inspired to write THIS letter:

Wait.. is this a joke?

Dear Stephenie Meyer,

Never in my wildest dreams did I ever think the next installment to the Twilight Saga would be a Novella about Bree – a new born flailing and screaming vamp that came oh so close to getting a second chance and a new diet, but met a slightly anticlimactic ending at the hands of the Volturi.

Steph, (can I call you Steph?) I believe I just made Bree 10 times more exciting than she actually was in Eclipse. I understand the purpose she served in the series; it not only showed Bella the true nature of a new born vampire, it set up expectations for the reader, so when Bella is changed she is remarkably different. So there it is. Purpose served. Why in Hale would you need to give her a back story?  When I read on your site that you wrote The Short Second Life of Bree Tanner: An Eclipse Novella, I stared at my screen for a good 30 seconds just dumbfounded (and wondered if you were a Full House fan – How RUDE!). Then I mumbled under my breath, “What about Midnight Sun?!”

I took my frustrations to twitter, where the fandom was agitated. Thank god I follow some hilarious, snarky people. The tweets sparked my imagination about all the 3^rd tier characters that I really never ever want you to write about any more than a blip in that elusive Twilight Series Guide (Yeah, December 2008, my ass). Just so we are clear, here are all the future titles we never want to see appear on your site:

• The Lauren Mallory Diaries (thanks MasenVixen for that gem)
• Cougartown: Mrs. Cope can’t help herself
• The Untold Story of Lee Stephens, a fainting teenage boy
• Fever Pitch – Renee and Phil’s love story
• Surf’s Up: Rebecca Black escapes to Hawaii
• A Pack Life: Jared does Sam’s bidding
• How to Price Gouge on the Olympic Peninsula – A John Dowling Handbook
• Austin, Connor and Ben – Nerds Unite! (this would be The Font and White Yorkie’s fav)

"Hi, I'm Bree." WHO!?

I’m hoping, Steph, that you get the point. I know these characters may fascinate you, but really all we want is Midnight Sun. There’s something that I’ve been dying to address with you…I’ve heard rumors that in writing New Moon, Eclipse and Breaking Dawn that you lost Edward’s voice. You fell in love with Jacob and could no longer give us a story from Edward’s perspective. Stephenie Meyer, I accuse you of being Team Jacob and the only way to prove your innocence is to finish Midnight Sun. This Bree story is insulting. I’m sorry, I do get easily distracted, but there’s no way that a Bree story will fulfill my need for Edward. GIVE ME MORE EDWARD.

Now once Midnight Sun is completed and I’ve read it 6 times, I will find it acceptable for you to write about the following:

• Edward Cullen – New Moon, well actually I’ve read the Fan Fic, “Dark Side of the Moon” and have convinced myself that this is what you would have written if you were Team Edward. So no rush on this Novella.
• Leah Clearwater – Who wouldn’t want to know more about this strong-willed shape shifter? She has a tragic love story and finally finds some reprieve when she leaves Sam’s pack. Will she imprint? Will she ever be able to have kids? Will she ever learn to like the Cullens?
• Edward Cullen – Leg Hitch, nuff said.
• Emmett Cullen – We got a Jasper and Rosalie back story, but poor lovable Emmett is left out. Emmett needs his time to shine!
• Edward Cullen – Please, please, please, please write Isle Esme from his perspective and for Pete’s sake, NO FADE TO BLACK.

Let’s recap: No one cares about Bree, do NOT write any more novellas about minor characters, FINISH MIDNIGHT SUN, then give us Honeymoon Edward. Is it really too much to ask??

Your faithful fan and Team Edward Captain,

Brooke

PS That was noon on June 5^th, right? *marks calendar*

Who else has June 5th marked on their calendar? And are you just gonna download the book for FREE or will you actually shell out some moolah to read it? And seriously…. BREE!? What are your thoughts!?

We’re gonna pound this one in your head. Don’t forget to check out The LTT Biggest Loser on The Forum

Our internet game is still ridiculous: The Forum, LTR, Twitter

Why “The Hillywood” show is better than Twilight and New Moon combined

Dear Catherine Hardwicke & Chris Weitz,

We love you Chris only– you know that, but…. well, you got outdone. By some amateurs with one camera. And a budget much smaller than you had.

Seriously, did you see the acting? It’s better than in both your movies combined. Hilly (aka Bella) brought us TEARS- real, actual tears.

And did you SEE the character of Jacob? Were we actually applauding Taylor Lautner for gaining weight and putting on muscle? This guy (aka Kyle Dayton- who I have since google stalked for many hours) seems to have a naturally amazing body and quite possibly a hotter face than Taylor Lautner. OR maybe it’s just because he’s probably older than 17 that I think that. Either way- WIN ALL AROUND!

Remember how I mentioned how I like the Bella that is with Jacob? I said how I love Bella with Edward because obviously they’re meant to be, but I kinda wish Bella could be split in two and be with Jake too? Well, the Hillywood girls have BAD BELLA aka Bella with Jake DOWN!! The leather pants? The rockstar attitude? The dark make-up? It was hot. I have a major crush on Hilly Hindi

And did you notice FUTURE Bella & Edward? They weren’t Anne-of-Green Gables fail. They were hot, attractive, and the dress was gorgeous- just like they should have been in New Moon. I am now convinced Bella can be attractive as a vampire. Before… not so much.

The Sparkles!?!- They RULED IT. While Chris you did a MUCH better job than Catherine, it turns out it wasn’t THAT difficult… all the Hillywood people did was use SPARKLY make-up. Duh! Even I could’ve told you that! And Jasper’s wig? While it’s totally still atrocious it was much less so than in New Moon! I think you need to contact those girls about their wig hook-up before Breaking Dawn starts shooting.

There is so much that is SPOT ON! The Tweed! The Grandpa shoes! The Purple (purple’s cool) on the bed!  Hilly rocks the attitude Bella should’ve had! Edward LEFT her! Cut down that Edward/Bella tree girl!

Everyone knows I’ve never been impressed with the chemistry between Edward & Bella from the movie. It has nothing to do with Robsten- I thought that from my first viewing. But in THIS parody? The chemisty between THEIR Edward & Bella? Aka Jacob Jost & Hilly Hindi? I’m ‘shipping Josttly or Hillcob or Jacly now. HARDCORE.

If you’re still not convinced at how much we loved this parody, read Moon’s reaction after the jump!

Something’s Different: No more new Twilight fans?

This is my Monday night date. You should SEE who I get on Thursdays..

Dear LTTers,

Something feels different. No, I don’t mean it’s been awhile since Ashley Greene was caught with some sort of Hollywood party boy (although it has been) nor do I mean that I haven’t cracked a joke about KStew’s mullet in awhile (although that’s true too). I just mean that this year, with the recent release of New Moon, feels quite different than last year after the release of Twilight. I can’t really put my finger on it exactly, but so far I’ve come up with this: Everyone is already a Twilight fan! Yes, my friends, Twilight has saturated the market. There are no new fans to be found. There is no one left who hasn’t tried out the books/movies and hated it (let’s burn them) or devoured the books in 36 hours and spent the next few months watching every clip ever mentioning “The Twilight Saga” online. It’s gotten as big as it’s going to get. Or…… has it? We received this letter the other day that had me questioning why I think something feels different:

Dear Twilight,

It’s been just over a month since that fateful Thursday, November 12, when I picked up my reserved copy of Twilight at my local library and finally started reading the first book of your saga. I was merely curious as to what was causing all of the hype and why my sister-in-law’s ideal man was named Edward Cullen. I figured with the movie, New Moon, coming out in a couple of weeks, now would be a good time to read this curiously popular book. I didn’t expect to stay up until 2am reading the first 375 pages, only forcing myself to bed because of work obligations the next morning. As I drifted off to sleep that night, my mind swirled with thoughts of Edward, Bella and the rest of the intriguing inhabitants of Forks, WA. The next day at work I was thankful that it was a Friday, but even more so I was excited to go (rush) home and finish the remaining pages of Twilight. I cracked open a bottle of red wine, broke off a piece of Ghirardelli’s Twilight Delight dark chocolate (I couldn’t resist!) and finished reading the remaining pages of Twilight. And so it began…

In all truth, I didn’t expect to like you. I didn’t expect to love you so much, re-reading you multiple times while awaiting my hold for New Moon to be filled at the library. Like so many others before me (apparently), I voraciously read the remainder of the saga in the next two weeks (only taking so long due to the wait at the library).

I can’t quite explain my new infatuation with you, and to be honest, my husband, at first, was a bit confounded, fearing that he would come home one day to find me all gothed-out and wearing white makeup. I assured him I had no desire to be a vampire. I don’t want to be Bella. I just love the characters and the inexplicable way it makes me feel when I read their story.

The saga is now #1 on my Christmas list this year, along with the special edition DVD.

Does her story sound familiar? Just maybe a year after yours? Read on after the jump!

What LTT has meant to me: From the mouths of our ‘fanbase’

2nd- post of the day alert! We asked a select few people to write a few words about what LTT/LTR has meant to them over the past year. Today we hear from two of our first 3 commenters! Staring with Christa- who we still lovingly refer to as “our fanbase” (anyone know what that is from!?)

Dear UC and Themoonisdown,

I can’t thank you enough for the last year. I’ve been laughing with you ever since I found you a year ago. Real Life has been calling lately and I haven’t been around as much, but I sneak back whenever I can to catch up on my TwiLOLz. You really are the best!

I wanted to write something funny and really hit one out of the park for you, but I find myself feeling a bit sentimental as I write this, so I’m going to tell you what I love about you. How do I love LTT? Let me count the ways.

1. I love that when I am down, all I have to do is go to LTT or LTR for a laugh. You have never let me down.
2. I love that when I found you I thought, “These girls are a riot. I hope they keep writing.” Not only have you kept it up, but I have gotten to watch your site grow beyond my wildest expectations.
3. I love that after a year you’re still posting all things Twilight and keeping it fresh. That’s talent!
4. I love that you’re so dang funny. You may think this is the same as #1 but it’s not. Lots of people make me laugh on a daily basis. You’re particular brand of humor is special. It’s witty, intelligent, and snarky, yet you will stoop to just plain silly when it’s called for. I dig that.
5. I love that you are bringing people together online and in real life.
6. I love that you not only have fun contests but that the fake prizes are often better than winning a real prize. I’ve caught myself thinking, “Oh man, I wish I had that fake prize.”
7. I love that you work so well together, trade off writing for both sites, and often give two different perspectives.
8. I love you for creating a venue where “sicknast”, “lamespice”, “AmanDUH”, and “Unicorns” can be used without explanation.
9. I love that you go to crazy Twilight events and post about your experiences, so that I don’t have to.
10. I love that we can count on you to Break It Down Vanity Fair Style.

I was going to stop at 10 but I think I’ll turn it up to 11.

11.   Most of all I love that we can give you our crazy and you tell us That’s Normal.

Love,

Your #1 Fan ‘86 Rabbit

And from VickyB, who found us soon after Christa did. We have both been blessed to meet Vicky many times in real life and can call her a real-life friend!!

This is how I met VickyB for the first time!

Dear LTR/LTT,

I was honored to receive an email inviting me to share what you mean to me on your special day. I can’t believe it’s been a year. A whole year of my life…and Rob’s. You have done so many things for me I don’t know where to start. You’ve taught me how to laugh (at myself and others) again. You’ve taught me that it is indeed completely #normal to play with dolls. I think my first letter was of my paper Rob doll (that was before I realized they sold actual dolls…like REAL dolls). You have made it possible for me to meet some amazing people *coughnotrobcough* but I know this one will take time.

Being a part of this little family, because seriously, I love two (Moon and UC) more than the sisters I never had, means so much to me. Without it I would actually have to do work…at work and we know how much that blows. I have come to fully appreciate the plaid. When I wore it the first time back in 1991, ugh, I didn’t fully appreciate it’s awesomeness. Now? I do. It’s hard to put this all into words. So I think I will close with a simple Haiku:

Before there was you
I knew not of the sex hair
Now I have come close

Love always and Happy effin’ Birthday LTR/LTT,

vickyb

This is our 2nd post of the day- Yes. We’re serious. Like Tweed. Read the first post here

New Moon rumor patrol

Dear New Moon,

So the movie has been our for a week and 1/2 now and you’ve made a gazillion dollars, and there are rumors floating around EVERYWHERE. I thought I’d take a little time today, dig into the news and gossip, contact my sources and really do some research into the stories out there to help us determine what to believe or not. Enjoy!

1. Women everywhere have forgotten about their vintage green washer & dryer and have taken up hand washing their clothes in a bucket of cold, sudsy water, and Wal-mart has suddenly tripled inventory on the old fashioned washboard (formally found in the craft department to be used as decoration) as demand increases due to all the women recently inspired to manually scrub out the stains in their clothing:

True- thanks to Taylor Lautner’s washboard abs. He now gets a royalty check every time Wal-mart sells an old-fashioned washboard.

2. Chris Weitz has agreed to do Breaking Dawn and make it into two films

False or True or… this is still a rumor: Chris is concerned that he set the bar pretty high this time with the yellow pants and isn’t sure if he has another color of slacks to top them when it comes time for Breaking Dawn promotion. He has a cranberry pair that his mom sent him for Thanksgiving (they have a stitching of a turkey along the top) but are they good enough? It’s really a lot to consider. PLUS, two more movies to film? He’s really concerned that Robsten can’t stick it out that long. And nothing would be worse than the world’s precious star couple breaking up the night before Rob is supposed to bite pillows and tear apart headboards. So if he agrees to it and if he finds the perfect pair of pants, he will probably recast Bella. He’ll cast me. He doens’t know it yet, but he will. I sent him a pair of bedazzled, neon blue “UC & Moon” pants last week. He’ll get them any day now and he’ll be convinced. Feathers all over my naked body, here I come!

New Moon means new laughs

Dear New Moon,

I know my letter title sounds like I might have a funny commentary about New Moon, the movie, but no, not yet. At press time I’ve only seen the movie once and I’m still reveling in Chris Weitz’ brilliancy. Plus I’m exhausted. Utterly exhausted. This week in LA with Moon was one of the best I’ve ever had, but we were busy and went went went non-stop. We were like little energizer bunnies or like me and Rob if we ever ended up in the same bed. We didn’t stop. So when I finally got a moment to rest yesterday in the airport as I waited for my plane home (as I was a major sad panda) I caught up on all the videos I missed from the past few weeks.  Here are 3 of my favorites!

My favorite Twilight cast interview last year does it again. Part 1 (warning. Don’t watch in your Sunday best. Lots of Language)

Swiftner lives!

Part 2 of uncensored cast interview:

Happy Sunday! Hope you laughed. I promise a REAL commentary about all the new laughs you are sure to provide us for months to come very soon. For now, I’m going to nap!

Love,
UnintendedChoice

Our internet game is ridiculous: The Forum, LTT, Twitter

Jackson got hurt. Did he try the leg hitch?

Dear Jackson,

Rumor has it that this week on the Eclipse set, you fell down and went ‘boom.‘ You poor baby! What happened? Tell me, it didn’t happen to involve a ‘leg hitch’ between Edward & Bella did it? I have no idea why you’d be on set for that scene, but I’m just double checking. Uh, if not, you don’t happen to know if there IS a leg hitch scene do you? Could you ask David Slade? Yes. Now. Get off the couch, stop icing whatever body part is ailing you (or remove the female currently helping you to “feel better”) and go check for me. And relay this message: “Dear David Slade, if there’s not a leg hitch you’re gonna wish you never took this job as director (well, you’ll wish it again). Trust me- you’d rather be shot by Charlie’s bb gun, attacked by wolves while a vampire sucks your neck and Cathy the Cougar offers to pleasure you orally then experience my wrath if Eclipse doesn’t include a leg hitch.”

To help you feel better, Jackson, I’ve provided, with the help of the gals at Rob’s flat in The Forum, Zephyersky & JodieO (okay they did ALL the work),  a little “Jackson porn” as well as some caption action. Okay, most of that is for us- we’ve been so worried about you- but I’ve included a little somethin’ somethin’ I think you’ll enjoy.

Feel better,
UnintendedChoice

Celebrating Jashley!

I’m starting to feel better! Are you? More after the jump!

Kristen & Taylor: The real life Bella & Jacob?

Dear Jake & Bells,

I think you have competition for the cutest friends that have ever lived:

Yes. Kristen & Taylor- or… that’s at least what Moon & I think…

Friends? Or lovers....?

Moon: so now that we’ve seen this video….don’t you love how KStew acts like shes old and wise. PUH LEASE girl!
UC: right…. you’re 19!!!
Moon: I liked her at the beginning with the smile stuff and then she had to get all “old soul” on us and talk about cajones
Moon: WAiT TiLL YOU GROW UP A LiTTLE and shut it
UC: side note- I love in that interview at the TCAs when he’s asking about the teenage years and doesn’t realize she’s STiLL a teen, and she’s pretending she’s not… but also knows everyone knows she is..and it’s a big ol’ awkward turtle
Moon: it’s cause she acts like she’s 50. Be 19. Dude I wasnt that serious at 19
UC: seriously. do keg stands- leak naked pictures of yourself or SOMETHiNG
Moon: Kellan will hold your legs while you do a keg stand- he’s a pro I can tell
UC: he’s done a LOT of keg stands…and then spent a lot of time in prayer the following day
Moon: Taylor would 100% be headed in his footsteps if he was a normal kid going to college soon- he’s so that good times guy. Just laughing it up, joking around- he just seems like a good time
UC: I have a feeling Taylor’s read some- oh dang.. what’s it called? Oh yeah… Wild at Heart
Moon: Like Taylor’s the guy you want to run errands with you on Saturday cause even though it’s mundane, it’s gonna be a lot of fun
UC: he’s probably gone on the Wild at Heart conferences where they go into the wild & think about how to never masterbate again…. with Big Daddy, of course
Moon: well if Taylor’s read Wild at Heart than KStew most defs needs to read Captivating
UC: dude I don’t think it’s called Wild at Heart– I think that’s the movie about the horse & the blind girl
Moon: it is wild at heart and also the movie. and the girl’s version of the book is Captivating
UC: First off, I love that you know what movie i’m talking about. and #2, I recently sold Captivating on ebay, and I’m pretty sure the address I shipped it to was for “Bella Stewart” somewhere in Vancouver…
Moon: totally cried at that movie when she went blind! and he loved her anyway….
UC: so.. you’re right…. Kristen is reading Captivating
UC: TOTALLY cried- my fav movie when I was growin up
Moon: she needs to learn how to get captivating
UC: I haven’t seen it in years
Moon: maybe it’s wild hearts cant be broken??
UC: YES!
Moon: whatever I get the two confused
UC: it’s often that I confuse men’s books on how not to lust vs. Disney films about blind chicks riding horses

Moon: I want to see Taylor & Kellan at a promise keepers event
UC: with Big Daddy and Kellan’s dad
Moon: And Big Daddy will wear a shirt that reads, “real mean sing real loud”
Moon: oh Promise keepers
UC: tens of thousands of men in the same room talking about how sometimes they jack off to thoughts of someone other than their wife.
Moon: while Phillips Craig and Dean lead the alter call. And then they all hug it out at the end and pile back into the church van
UC: church jokes are fun

What’s this site about again? Oh yeah, Twilight. We get back to it after the jump…

Twilight- Escape from reality

Dear deep thinking LTTers,

I’ve been a bit down lately. There’s the looming reality that it looks like Rob might not actually be interested in being my on the side boyfriend and is shacked up with an 80s hairdo right now. And it doesn’t look like Summit got my letter begging them to cast me in a small role in Eclipse. And no matter how much I wish to be “17 Again,” I keep waking up way too old to become the girlfriend of Taylor Lautner. Yes, there’s all that, but what’s really gotten me down is the reality of the world we live in. There’s war, there’s typhoons, there’s terrorism & hunger. People with jobs & families are kidnapped, murdered and raped, and all the while I sit in my little comfy desk chair (that I actually have the audacity to complain about because there’s this little metal piece that sometimes pokes my butt) in my perfectly heated home with my cute little happy cats and my full belly, with food in the cupboard, clothes in my closest and money in my bank account. And I blog about vampires….. while the world around me is full of a pain and a hurt that I have no way of comprehending.

Yeah – I just went there – On LTT where we usually talk about Buttcrack Santa, Fake lesbians & ponder how many cheeseburgers Big Daddy Lautner can handle in one lunchtime sitting. I’d be lying if I said I’ve never experienced guilt for spending so much time talking and thinking about this blog about vampires while the world around me is crumbling. In the grand scheme of things, Twilight matters so very little. But then it occurred to me- maybe that’s why it’s so meaningful to everyone. Maybe we all love Twilight so much because it’s an escape from reality.  Stephenie Meyers built this world where we can experience first love all over again. We get to watch someone go through self-acceptance, see the bonds of family strengthen and old walls between enemies fall down. And the communities that have sprung up because of the Twilight world (ahem) give people the perfect place to go when they want to forget what’s going on in the outside world for just a little while…

I’m sure you’ve come across people in your life, just as I have, who don’t get it.  They mock your sudden interest in vampires and can’t understand how you’re so interested in a book series that is on the shelves back by the children’s section at Barnes & Noble. They think it’s something as simple as an obsession over a book. Sure- the story is captivating, and the movie happens to star a really handsome guy. And the drama that surrounds the cast & filming is pretty fun since it’s so high-profile now, but all that isn’t the point. The point is that it’s not famine and war and financial difficulties and a job hunt. It’s not real- it’s a world where we can forget what’s really going on. And I’m not sure it really matters what it is- it could have been a book about a pack of wolves falling in love with nursery school kids all over the globe, but it wasn’t- it was Twilight. (And for those that wish it weren’t, it includes a lil’ nursery school love story for you all…)

We’ve heard your stories. We’ve read your e-mails. We’ve gotten to know so many of you. Our hearts have broken and tears have spilled when we’ve read what you were going through when you picked up the first book. Every day we’re completely overwhelmed that a silly idea of writing a blog in December turned into a community where people have found friends that understand their pain and have the ability to make them laugh. We love that we get the chance to make you laugh and help you forget reality for a few paragraphs every day. Moon & I have stories of our own too. We promise to share them someday, but know that Twilight, LTT & LTR and YOU have truly changed our lives.

Twilight doesn’t change the world. Twilight does very little for the world, but Twilight has brought us friendships & a community that allows us laughter in times of sorrow, excitement in times where we might otherwise be scared and a way to escape the daily realities of life, even for just a few moments….

Feeling a lil’ contemplative (you think?),
UnintendedChoice

PS: If you’re wondering if I’ve gotten a visit from a monthly friend, the answer is “She’s coming today.” x

Have you had that moment when you read a news story, watched TV or just remembered that life isn’t our little bubble and felt guilty? How do you balance something that’s been so good & healthy for you (Twilight!) with remembering it’s not all of life? Do you feel like these are discussion questions from freshman year of college?

Keep the discussion going over in The Forum
Yeah.. sorry… Kinda deep today- LAUGH with Moon on LTR

Art Source #1 and Source #2

Blurbs about the Teen Choice Awards

Dear Twilight,

Another award ceremony is over huh? I’ll confess I didn’t watch it. But I plan to do no work and catch up on all the video clips I missed during the day today.

Don’t think I didn’t spend all Monday & Monday night breaking down people, outfits & gossip from the TCAs though. No no.. never doubt me.  Enjoy today’s Blurbs about the Teen Choice Awards from The Quad, Calliope & Brooke.

Love,
UnintendedChoice

The one with that girl we don’t recognize from Twilight

Vodpod videos no longer available.

EastFriend: I watched Mark Steines’ cute lil’ interivew with the Twilight cast after the TCAs ended, and could not, for the life of me, figure out why there was a little Asian lady tagging along with the Twi-crew.

• Did Ashley rescue her from a Taiwanese sweatshop and put her on Summit’s staff, thereby offering and encouraging a better lifestyle?
• Was sweet lil’ Asian lady really a dealer in disguise? Cause some serious doobie could be hidden in the folds of that scarf!

And then it hit me. It’s Justin Chong. Dude…when did he come out? And where was Neil Patrick Harris?

The one where Rob channeled Ward Cleaver

Leave it to Rob-ver

EastFriend: Rob looked cute.  The scruffy beard was good times.  But the outfit?   What’s with channeling Ward Cleaver at the TCAs?  Even Mike Brady had better style than that.
4 hours later she still can’t get over it
EastFriend: 50 bucks says that plaid shirt Rob wore last night was STINKY. Marcus’ sweat all over it. You know he didn’t wash it. Just picked it up off Marcus’ hotel room floor. Thank God Stephanie prob had the foresight to say, “Let me press that for you.” Maybe she sprayed Febreeze on the arm pits. One can only hope…

Read all about classical music, twilight scandals & real lesbians after the jump!