Twilosophy: I am NOT the number 1 Twilight fan!

Dear Twilight and fellow LTT-ers,

Recently a girl I sorta know found out about the blogs and asked me “so you’re like the number one Twilight fan, huh?!” and I wholeheartedly and vehemently said NO! No I am NOT the number one Twilight fan cause in my mind number one fan is some crazy lunatic with Twilight tattoos, owns the entire line of tshirts from Hot Topic, sleeps on the sidewalk for days on end…  number one fan brings to mind visions of that show, FANatic on MTV and how some crazy person deemed an artist’s number one fan went apeshit when they met SugarRay or Britney Spears and that’s about the farthest thing from what I’d do if I ever REALLY met any of these people in real life. In reality I’d pretty much look the other way while hoping they didn’t think I was staring at them. Far from having a fangirl freak out or even acknowledging that I know who they are and NEVER ever in a million years mentioning that I write a blog about them or the books every day.

Yup, number one fan, that's me!

But just because I’m not those things that make me think #1 fan does that make me any less of one? Maybe I really am a number 1 fan. I run this blog, I’ve been to more than my fair share of Twilight related events, heck I have business cards in my handbag with this blog’s URL on it… somehow in my mind this does not equate number one fan but to the outside world, aka the rest of the population, who only know Twilight as that thing “the kids are into” I probably look like the biggest fan that ever lived.

I shudder to think!

So what does it all mean? Follow the cut to see what I come up with…
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New Moon: The Hits and the Misses, Moon’s review part 2

*Missed part one? Read it here*

The wolf's outta the bag

Dear LTT-ers and anyone every having to do with New Moon,

Today we continue on with beating a dead horse aka our reviews of New Moon and this is my part two since I was so long winded the first time around. Wednesday, I started this review by posting what I call the hits and misses of the movie so let’s continue down that path…

c

Alrighty smile for the camera, say: "cheee-we'retotallyoblivious towhatsreallygoingoninthistown-eeese"

Hit
The Humans
Once again the humans are really the highlight of the film. Just like in Twilight they bring the funny and the sense of reality. They act like high school students, make stupid (read: awesome) jokes and generally remind us that not everyone is an undercover sensitive, brooding monster. If I had to give props to give one human though I think it would have to be Billy Burke as Charlie, famous ladies man. This time around we actually feel the bond between him and Bella which isn’t cut short with stutter-y phrasing or bad awkward moments. He plays the Dad figure well and you actually feel for him as he tries to comfort Bella. I also noticed in the dream sequence when Bella remembers the Werewolf/Vampire story the person laying on the forest floor is not her but is Charlie (at least I think!) if so, it just further illustrates that she really doesn’t want him to get hurt because of her crazy monster secret life. Awwwww… can’t wait till I see if again to really see if it was Charlie.

c

Dizzy, I'm so dizzy my head is spinning Like a whirlpool it never ends And it's You girl makin' it spin

Miss
Dizziness
UC talked about it and I will to, I’m sure it was used as some sort of visual tool to disorient us but I think it worked all TOO WELL. Everytime she trips and falls in the forest I think “here we go again” and get a good grip in my chair because we’re about to take a trip on New Moon the ride now at Universal Studios. Let me off! Let me off! Bellaaaaa, BellAH… Get me off this crazy thing… called love (anyone? anyone?!)

c

Excuse me, what did you just say?

Hit
Chemistry between Bella & Jacob
One of my favorite scenes between them is the “break up” scene after Jacob has turned and Bella, tired of getting the dismissal from Billy, goes to find out why he’s been missing. They emote, they stare into each other eyes, they tug at my heart strings, they make me cry. Taylor has probably the best set of puppy dog eyes ever and uses them to kill us every time. How can Bella be immune to THAT?! They really do portray two people who are great friends torn apart by great odds who try to overcome them. I think it’s probably why I lean so heavily in favor of Team Jacob in this movie. There’s really nothing like a true best friend.

Seriously let’s finish this thing up after the cut
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Jimmy Fallon is SUCH a Twilight fanboy!

Nouget-about-it!

Dear Jimmy Fallon,

First off I heart your show! If anyone had to take the late night spot of my beloved Conan, I’m glad its you. While your hair doesn’t stand up to the fabulous red heights of CoCo’s beautiful soft serve ice cream cone of a hairdo, your humor does. I cant tell you how many times me and my friends yell out “BOTHERED” on a daily basis or “hungerectomy” (when you get your hunger removed, naturally) or “snacklish” (I learned my first word in Snacklish: it’s BOTHERED!) and beg everyone we know to visit Robertisbothered.com just so they can participate in the awesomeness of “pumpkins are dumb fat squashes!” Now, we originally thought you were jumping on the Twilight/Rob bandwagon because it’s the (sorta, if you’re a major nerd like us) hip thing right now and heck, if we’re all honest anything Twilight will get you mad viewers.

But I was so wrong.

but really what's it like being with EDWARD CULLEN?! Does he really sparkle?

You didn’t make Robertisbothered.com or have Taylor and Kristen on your show just because you wanted viewers. You did it cause you’re SUCH A FANBOY!!! It’s alright to admit it, I watched your interviews with both Kristen and Taylor and I could see it in your eyes. You had the look of a Twimom who’d been standing in line at a Hot Topic for 10 days just to get the new Jacob doll or to get your DVD signed by Bob the Electrician #3 on the film. Trust me, I’m a seasoned professional Twilight outer, I can see this stuff a mile away.  So when you started acting all nervous and dorky (more than usual) around Kristen I knew you had it BAD. You talked about the good stuff like Bon Iver (though KStew didn’t know the backstory) and you had her throw footballs at plates (aka what the UC & Moon’s talk show would consist of) I just wished you had freaked her and Taylor out with some super creepo detailed fan questions such as:

  • “So have you thought about how you’re going to act out a half human, half vampire baby is eating its way out of your uterus?
  • Seriously, fade to black?! Don’t you agree Kristen, Stephenie Meyer is such a cock block there?!
  • Taylor, you’re gonna imprint on a newborn baby, don’t you find it funny that after protecting you for the last year, Chris Hansen is gonna be chasing after YOU now?! Cause I’m dying thinking of the irony here.
  • So what’s Buttcrack Santa really like!? SPILL!

Read the rest and watch some videos of awesomeness after the cut

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Meeting Chris Weitz at the Billboard Film and TV Music Conference

chrisalexandrepanel

Oh myello there Chris and Alexandre! Even this lady couldn't contain herself!

Dear LTT-ers/nmm.org-ers (that’s your new name!) and Chris Weitz fans (which should be everyone),

Today was a mindgasm, red letter day in the life of me, your faithful blogger: Moon. As both a Twilight fan, music fan and aspiring music supervisor, I was able to attend the Billboard Film and TV Music conference in Beverly Hills to cover to events for both us and our awesome super special friend and affiliate Will at NewMoonMovie.org who secured our entrance into the event. The conference featured two Twilight New Moon themed panels. One discussing the soundtrack success featuring New Moon soundtrack music supervisor Alex Patsavas, a VP from Atlantic Records and Paul Katz, music consultant and uppity up at Summit Entertainment.

The other New Moon themed panel was “A Conversation with a Director and Composer” featuring Chris Weitz and Alexandre Desplat who discussed New Moon and its score and music for a hour. Now, this was some hardcore discussion regarding the composition of the score, influences how they began the process, etc. It was NOT a panel where they discussed Robsten or anything about the actors other than what pertained to the topic of the New Moon score.

I’ll be writing a more in depth post in the next few days reviewing both panels in more depth but for today I’ll give you a quick overview of some juicy tidbits from Chris’s panel and what WE (yes WE I met the man himself talked about after the panel) chatted about. Hang on kiddies, we’ll get there but first some of what Chris and Alexandre discussed:

  • There were themes (musical) created for for each character. IE one for Bella, one for Bella and Edward, one for Jacob
  • To reflect the confusion in Bella’s mind after Edward leaves, at times the “Edward” and “Jacob” themes are “blurred” together to help created “subliminal confusion” in her mind
  • Jacob’s “theme” features electric guitar. Alexandre used a guitar that sounded very similar to an Indian sitar and Chris jokingly reminded him that Jacob is Native (Indian) American not Indian from India
  • The score will not featuring any of Carter Burwell’s score. (I’ll expound more on this decision in a later post)
  • And the most important info: Chris wore a lot of olive and tan. He was in full on DILF mode with cargo pants, striped socks (i love a good sock!), some sort of olive sweater and a leather man purse. Work it Chris, WORK IT!

Ok, so here’s the part you all want to read MY CHRIS WEITZ ENCOUNTER (that didn’t take place in my dreams):
FOLLOW THE CUT (moohahahaa)
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AmandDUH’s at it again – Decode!!

Dear LTT-ers, train wreck lovers and video enthusiasts,

Our dear dear Twimom video vixen AmanDUh is at it again! And yes she’s gone back to covering songs and wouldn’t you know this time it’s Decode by Paramore. I about jumped out of my chair when I got the notification she had updated and she doesn’t let us down!

Looks like AmanDUH’s invested in a make up artist for this video. Yup she got eyeliner and what I can only assume is a  tear drop “tattoo” on her cheek. Now where I’m from that means something quite different that being sad. Thats just straight gangsta! Did she get in a prison gang fight at the ladies penitentury and kill one of her homies? DAAAYUM Amanduh’s hardcore! I better watch my back, she’s libel to cuttabitch. But really, I’m just glad she brought back “special” Edward for this video, I was beginning to miss him and his hairline.

Enjoy! And uh don’t turn up the volume too loud she hits a few notes that only dogs will be able to hear.

How did we get herAH?
Themoonisdown

-UC dazzles us with some Rob goodness over at Letters to Rob
– create your own video and post it at the forum so we can all laugh!

STRIPWARD Lives

Dear Twilight,

I never thought writing a blog that obsessed over a young adult novel about vampires would one day lead me into a chat room where a man would strip while me and other fans of said novel and blog whistled, cat called and virtually shoved dollar bills into his pants. To say I am thankful and not sure how anyone could top this would be downplaying it.

All names and identities will remain concealed but he will forever be known as STRIPWARD!
stripchat01e
Shyly he introduced himself to us. We think he’s definitely Team Jacob.

stripchat02e
Not so shy after all!

stripchat03e

Then we moved to the interview portion of the show as we asked him questions pertaining to dumpsters, his stance on raybans and button flys and whether or not he should be wearing socks.

Somewhere, today, I’m sure Stripward is crying naked in the bathtub in the fetal position after meeting us but we love you and don’t feel wrong about something that feels so right!

Special thanks to all the ladies who shared this moment together! You know who you are and I love you!

Yes my friends it has been a remarkable week in my own personal Twilight world. Stay tuned on Monday I will bring you my Comic Con letter/review/general fangirlness!

Pour some sugar on him me!
Themoonisdown

PS He’s no StripWard but he’ll always be our RobWard… read a letter to our main man at Letters to Rob!

Chat over the weekend and order your own Stripward at The Forum!

She’s at it again! AmanDAH the TwiMom video vixen!

Dear LTT/LTR-ers,

Remember last weekend when I brought you my newest favorite fan video creator? Well she’s at it again and we’ve decided to give her a nickname because she’s too amazing NOT to have one. This lovely gal shall now be called AmandDAH the Twimom Video Vixen, cause yes, this woman is a mom! And she’s not only creating vids of her version of the New Moon trailer with her special hubster but is writing, singing and recording her own songs inspired by Twilight! Oh yes, hang on to your butts cause this is gonna blow that trailer out of the water!

Let’s start out with her upbeat diddy titled “My Vampire”

I keep worrying that her shirt may fall off through this whole video… makes it hard to concentrate on the amazing lyrics…

Starting over
in a new school forks high
eyes on me
dont like the attention

then i spot him out
staring me down
looking mean
looking pale and handsome

hes not a man hes a vampire

Alrighty now let’s slow it down with her next smash hit titled “Beautiful Vampire”

Now if I was the director of a Twilight porno spoof: Bella Does Forks, this is the song I would pick for the soundtrack…

pale white skin
ice cold chill
sheild of mine
vampire eyes
fast
blink of an eye

thirst of my wine

hes beautiful
beautiful vampire

Seriously guys, I really can’t wait to see what AmanDAH comes up with next cause I couldn’t write this stuff… she’s the biggest Twilight fan who’s never read Twilight!

Happy Saturday!
Themoonisdown

LTR
The Forum

Follow the cut for a very special announcement about the Porn-off between us and the Twi Sisterhood
Continue reading

Holy crap – 2nd hand embarrassing New Moon fanmade video

Dear LTT-ers,

It’s that time again, YUP time to be 2nd hand embarrassed by a fellow “fan” of Twilight. And today I bring you an extra ambitious fan who not only created a New Moon trailer, but wrote the script, acted in it (as Bella of course), SANG the music and enlisted her husband/some dude to play Edward. Oh yes, we have a live Edward in this one. And not to be mean but I think she might have found him at the group home around the corner, promised him a part time job and then told him his job was to “be Edward. Claw my face with your paw as if I’m a glazed doughnut and don’t take the grill on the way out”

watch it: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YNclyinIGX8

fanvideonewmoon
Shhhh kids, mommy and daddy are trying to act like teenage vampires… go back to your room!

She actually had a few other Twilight related videos up and promised a video of her version of Twilight. Sadly, she’s taken them down but we still get this gem! She truly is a prolific video creator, songwriter AND author (of TWO books!)! Check it ALL out. Trust me.

Happy Saturday!
Themoonisdown

Check out LTR
and
The Forum

The New Moon movie poster leaks and makes a big impression on the Quad! That’s what she said!

You bes be steppin' Edward! There's a new set of cheekbones in town!

You bes be steppin' Edward! There's a new set of cheekbones in town!

Dear LTT-ers

So when the official New Moon poster leaked yesterday evening we KNEW there had to be a special “Breaking it down Vanity Fair Style” post on Letters to Twilight. So I shined the Quad Signal in the sky and we all convened at a google chat room our super top secret lair of awesomness and commenced a super-de-dooper fangirl breaking it down!  So get yourself a cocktail and a comfortable chair and settle in cause this one’s a dooooozy…  and see how many times Eastfriend talks about cheekbones and a special fake prize to anyone who catches how many time’s we say “that’s what she said.”

Get excited folks, New Moon is around the corner!
Themoonisdown, UnintendedChoice and the Quad

moon: myello
Eastfriend: i am here and i am enjoying deliciousness. and cheekbones.
moon: omg the bigger one is SO much better! THATS WHAT SHE SAID
UC: SOOOOO GOOOOD hahahah
moon: you can see all the details!
Eastfriend: THATS WHAT SHE SAID!
UC: good start so hot. lemme pull it up. THATS what she said! off to a great start
Eastfriend:  i love that jacob is in between them…that is KEY!
moon: the pissed off faces
moon: rob definitely gives better face
Eastfriend: he gives better head. ahem.
moon: that too. and the FISTS!! time to fight boys!
Eastfriend: loving the crest.
Eastfriend: CHeekBONeS. forever.
moon: no tattoo in the shot though. big reveal later
UC: I know when they did this poster
moon: it was that DAY with all those great pics on set
Eastfriend: yep.
Eastfriend: cheekbones.
UC: you’re loving those bones huh? that’s what she said
UC: He looks the same. and amazing. short hair. his hair is a bit longer now
Eastfriend: he looks exactly same, that’s why he had the orange blush on that day–photoshoot.
moon: the wardrobe

Summer Donna! Simmer down now!

Summer Donna! Simmer down now!

UC: yep exactly. Tay’s loooking great. I’m so proud of him
Eastfriend: her hair is lamespice.
UC: like he’s my lil brother. Kristen looks beautiful though, her face
moon: jacob looks like he’s somewhere between pouting and being sassy
moon: hes been taking classes with selena at the disney school of faces
UC: Tay looks dark next to Rob. which is good. he wishes it were Selena
UC: do you think that Kristen wanted to push over Taylor to get to Rob? but couldn’t b/c of his huge native american muscles?
EastFriend: rob is 100% better than last poster. thank GOD!
UC: So far this photographer is awesome i mean.. the green screen is cool. and the photoshopper is awesome
Eastfriend: CHEEkboneS.
Moon: yea SO much better than the last. he looks more real and less lame-o vampire

Much more to be covered… Rob’s makeup tips, inspecting things south of the border, Westfriend weighs in and MORE after the cut Continue reading

2nd Hand Embarrassment – I Kissed Your Mom, Bella Swan

Dear LTT-ers

Wow just WOW there’s so much 2nd hand Embarrassment in this video I don’t know where to start. I just want to turn it off or look away but these videos are like car crashes you just can’t stop staring in horror at the tangled mess. First off I think someone owes Katy Perry an apology for totally screwing over her song “I Kissed A Girl” cause OF COURSE they changed it to “I Kissed Your Mom” with a Jacob and Bella theme and then added in all kinds of terrible fan art.
Witness the offenses…

fanartbellabike
Yes, if you couldn’t tell this toddler on a motorbike cruising her way through what is obviously Forks, Washington is supposed to be Bella. Nothing says MILF like a bug eyed-anime eyed kid on a Little Tykes trike.

creepyPSjacob
And OF COURSE what embarrassing picture video montage even remotely featuring Jacob is complete without this super creepy totally photoshopped picture. How long has this gross pic been floating around and people are STILL using it. Nice painted on wig, dude.

And I’ve saved the best part of the video for last…

jacobfanart
I don’t know about you all but this is totally how I pictured the imprinting scene going down, complete with heart eyeballs and wolftail! Seriously??!! Come on people! Actually this might belong in Monday Funnies.

Make it stop!!

I kissed your mom and I liked it, her cougar lips invited… her hungry eyes, her quivering thighs… (wtf!)
themoonisdown

Check out the rest of our 2nd hand embarrassment