Unicorns DO exist!

I miss Twilight. I think I’ll watch it again soon- as soon as I remember who I lent my copy of the DVD to! But what I miss a ton is hearing what guys think of Twilight. This fan letter today reminded me of when we heard these stories all.the.time:

Dear Twilight,

You acquired a new fan this weekend and it might surprise you who it is. It sure surprised me. It’s my husband! After a full year of trying to keep my husband in the dark about Twilight, I was forced out into the open by Showtime. You see, I hadn’t let my husband watch the Twilight movie for fear that he would think I was insane for liking it. I hid the DVD behind other DVDs in the hopes that he wouldn’t find it and decide to just pop it in one day to see what all the fuss was about. Then the moment I was dreading happened. Twilight started playing on cable. And let’s face it, once it starts showing on cable, it’s virtually impossible to NOT see it. So I had a choice to make. I could not pay the bill and let our cable get disconnected or I could “woman up” and finally sit down to watch it with him. I decided to be an adult and face the music. After putting the kids to bed and settling in with a bottle of wine (all for me, btw), me and my husband turned on Twilight.

I fully expected to be ridiculed for the next 2 hours, but something surprising started happening. My husband looked like he was enjoying it. I had to explain a few things at the beginning, because so much was left out from the book. But other than that he seemed to get it. He laughed at the appropriate times. He really enjoyed Charlie (but who didn’t, right?). He laughed at Edward’s snarky comments. But what was more surprising was what he didn’t laugh at. He didn’t laugh at “Spider Monkey”, the cheesy special effects, “My Monkey Man” or Kristen’s stuttering and stammering in the hospital scene. And I was certain he would laugh at the sparkling. Come on! Even we lover’s of Twilight laugh at the cheesiness of the sparkling vampires. Nope! There was not even a smirk when Edward revealed himself. Was it possible my husband was actually liking this or was he just humoring me? As the movie came to an end, I was a little nervous. I didn’t want to ask my husband what he thought. He’s pretty tough when it comes to movies. He has a tradition of rating movies on a scale of 1 – 10. Most movies get a 5. One of his favorite movies, The Dark Knight, only got a 9 out of 10. I figured we were doing good if he gave it a 5. He didn’t say anything, however, so I assumed it was much worse than I thought and he was just sparing my feelings. Finally as we were getting ready for bed he said, “I liked it. I’d give it a 7.” What?! Were my ears deceiving me? Did my husband actually like this? Was he just mocking me? Or did I have a unicorn on my hands? The next words out of his mouth confirmed it, “I wouldn’t mind going to see the next one at the theater with you.” He spent the next few minutes asking me questions about the rest of the books/movies and trying to clarify points he didn’t quite understand. In the end, he admitted he thought it was a pretty romantic movie.

To think that I’ve spent the last year trying to keep my obsession under wraps, when I could have just let it all out for him to see. Apparently sparkling, emo vampires who only drink animal blood and attend high school over and over do not bother him. He found it interesting. What I found interesting were some of his comments during the movie. I’ve only ever watched and discussed Twilight with other women. It was nice to get a man’s perspective. Here were some of this thoughts as the movie played.

Random thoughts my husband had during Twilight

• Jessica is “stacked”
• Why are all those guys hitting on her (Bella)? I would go for the other girl (Jessica). She seems like she’d be a lot more fun. She actually smiles and laughs.
• That guy (Rob) looks A LOT better in this movie than he did when we saw him on Letterman. ( I strongly disagreed with this, but he thought Rob looked better with his vampire make-up)
• I bet she’s a joy to live with with (Bella). She seems like such a downer.
• If you knew he was vampire, would you go off into the woods with him alone?
• He admits he killed people and she doesn’t care?!
• Wouldn’t kissing a vampire feel like kissing a cold, dead fish?
• I can’t imagine not being able to sleep. I’d get bored.
• So he (Edward) waits 100 years to fall in love and that’s (Bella) who he chooses?
• Why doesn’t he just change her? Wouldn’t that solve the problem? (This was said during the chase scene with James)

But my favorite exchange came during the bedroom kiss scene:

As Edward slowly leans in to kiss Bella
DH: Wouldn’t that be like kissing your steak dinner?
Me: Ssshh! You’re ruining it for me.
Edward flings himself off of Bella and against the wall
DH: Whoa! Why did he do that? Was he turned on?
Me: Yes. He can’t go too far. He can’t have sex with her.
DH: Really? Why?
Me: He can’t lose control around her or he might accidentally kill her.
DH: Hmmm. . . now I know why you like this. It’s all about the yearning and the longing. Women love stuff like that.
Me: Shut up.

Unicorns DO exist!

So there you have it. I was doubting the existence of unicorns. I’ve heard people on this site talk about unicorn sightings, but I never really believed it. Now I can say that, yes, there are men who like Twilight. There are men who don’t laugh at sparkling vampires who wear too much lipstick. I know. I live with one.

Toooldforthis

Seriously- I laugh at that picture to our right EVERY TIME. Tonight, my husband who normally tells me to STOP blogging said, “UC- you need to blog about vampires and stop watching Chuck & Blair fanvids” My.. how the times have changed!

After the jump, see the hilarious winning entry from the contest we ran yesterday! ANDDDDDDD finally… that trailer we all want to see!

The mistakes of Twilight

Dear LTTers,

Thank you so much for your congratulations & sweet words regarding our 10 month anniversary yesterday. We have a confession that we’d like to share in the form of “texts from last night” between Moon & UC:

Text from Moon: “Just wrapped up my ’10 month anniversary/10 things I love about Twi’ post- getting in bed- wouldn’t it be funny if we calculated wrong and our 10 month anniversary is next week?”
Text from UC: “We’d look like the biggest idiots”
Text from Moon: “Umm…. I just calculated. Can you double check my math”
Text from UC: “Yep. Just double checked.
Happy 9 month anniversary”

Oops. I know we seem perfect, but we’re not. For example, we miss things. Once there was a picture of Big Daddy with a dabble of ketchup down the front of his shirt. We missed an opportunity to photo-shop him in a Heintz ketchup ad. And one time Moon said “I bet it’s hard to be Jacob Black” and I forgot to say “that’s what she said.” It’s hard to be perfect all the time. We try. But we sometimes fail. Even we make mistakes.

So in honor of our 9 month anniversary (yesterday) and to continue our new fond love of making lists, here are 9 mistakes from the Twilight world:

1. The Bandslam & PUSH previews on the Twilight DVD

(that you cannot fast forward through- bastards) Summit thought they were being sneaky, making us watch those previews before we got to see Robward’s beautiful face. Little did they know that I just made copies of the DVD, got rid of the previews and sold them illegally on the black market. In your Face Summit. Just kidding. What I really did was press Play; Go make some popcorn; Pour myself some bubbly; Walk back into the room; Groan that Vanessa Hudgens was STILL on the screen; Go pee; Put on my PJs; Come back. Movie time. In your face, Summit.

Dear Stephenie, This outfit is not hot Love, us

2. Edward’s taste of music, clothing & bedding in the books

WestFriend: Why did Stephenie make Edward so lame when it comes to music taste. Umm…hi. He hates the 60’s and 70’s? The BEST time for music ever? And he LOVES the 50’s and some of the 80’s? It has bothered me so bad.
Moon: SMeyer is an enigma. Cause the 60s ruled the music scene. But the real questions are: Why does she make Edward wear sleeveless button ups and have black and gold brocade bedding?? These things I’ve never understood.

3. Including Perry Farrell and Collective Soul on the Soundtrack

Dear Summit,

It’s clear from your marketing that you are unaware that anyone other than 12 to really immature 15 1/2 year olds like the Twilight saga, so why in the world would you force Alexandra Patsavas (who made Death Cab for Cutie & Imogen Heap household names, so I know it wasn’t her doing) to include an old washed up rocker looking for a comeback & a band that no one has thought of since 1995 on the soundtrack?

4. The EW magazine cover that ended the careers of a photographer & editor

I just need one.more.hit. Buy my apple?

And if the photographer & editors weren’t fired, they should’ve been- or maybe even hung. Who told them Twilight was about methed-up teen addicts who sell their last piece of food- an apple- to buy enough meth so they could ceremoniously commit a joint suicide/OD and spend eternity together listening to Collective Soul? EW Fail

Follow the jump for the rest of the mistakes!

A tear jerker Twilight Thursday

Dear LTTers,

We’ve shared this week about the crazy letters we get from special Twilighters who provide us with countless laughs.  But for every 10 25 crazy emails we get, we read one that brings us to tears.  Today we’re going to set-aside the normal funny jokes & banter (I know you don’t believe me- you think I’m gonna post a picture of Buttcrack Santa singing “Friends are Friends forever” with Tequila Tomas, but I’m being serious) because we received a letter that touched us so deeply that it can’t not be shared:

To me the Twilight Saga has more meaning than most.
It has actually changed my life!

I know that sounds crazy but please let me explain:

Almost 3 years ago I had an accident that resulted in a head injury. I have been trying to re-learn everything, but without short term memory, it is a huge, frustrating, challenge. The best way to describe my life is like living the movie “Fifty First Dates” without the humor! I feel “lost in space” most of the time. My brain now reacts like pieces of a puzzle that have been thrown up in the air, and I am constantly trying to grab them to put them back in place! Reading had always been my escape- my passion- until the accident. Since then, no matter how hard I tried, I either couldn’t understand the most simplest of words, or couldn’t hold on to the information long enough so that I could follow the story. I had all but given up hope. Then came Twilight!

My daughter knew I’d love the movie, but because I can’t ever go out (It’s very hard with a head injury, you look “normal”, so people don’t understand if you’re dizzy or say the wrong word, and it became too embarrassing (especially when people assumed I was drunk!) I stopped going anywhere). So she waited for the DVD to be released and didn’t tell me she also bought the book. Using the movie as a guideline, I tried to read the book. What I couldn’t follow or understand while reading, I would use the movie I had loaded onto my computer, to refer to. It took many months and lots of notes, but I DID IT! I read my 1st book! I can never find the words to express how I felt the day I came to the last page! A precious gift had been given back to me!

How do I thank everyone for creating a movie with characters that were interesting enough for me to WANT to read the book. A story, so well written that I REFUSED to give up until I finished reading it. Although I lose pretty much all of it after I sleep, it’s a worthwhile challenge to watch the movie and read the book every day, to keep practicing! (Although I have to admit on a couple of occasions, I made myself stay awake all night because I was at such a great part in the book, I didn’t want to lose it!!) I must hold the record for having watched and read Twilight the most times!! A friend of mine was even keeping count for awhile, I think she stopped after 122 or something! I wish I could personally thank Stephenie Meyer, Melissa Rosenberg, Catherine Hardwicke & the entire cast for giving back to me the gifts of courage, strength and determination. Who knows what is next, maybe I WILL find the courage to go OUT to see New Moon! The thought alone terrifies me, but I know that I have to keep trying, that I can NEVER give up because dreams do come true! My most sincere thanks to all!

Sincerely,
Cyndi

How many tissues did you go through during that story? To quote Jessica Stanley, “I know, right?”

Cyndi shared with us that LTT/LTR have made it onto one of her infamous post-its, to remind her to read it everyday! And even though it sometimes takes her hours to read what we write, when she finishes and ‘gets’ the joke, she is laughing along with all of us!

Cyndi- you joked that you were going to have to write a post-it note to remind yourself that your letter is going to be posted. Hope the reminder worked & we didn’t scare you! Thank you again for sharing your beautiful story and not only touching me & Moon, but I’m guessing everyone who reads this post today!

Kellan bear hugs from both of us,
UC & Moon

PS: Decided to throw you a little “Cullen Smile” after the jump

Things that happen to me that make me think Twilight may be too big a part of my life

Dear Twilight,

It’s 12:18 am. I did approximately 4.5 hours of work today at my job although I was there for 8 hours and 15 minutes. The rest of the time I responded to blog emails, approved comments, responded to comments, lurked on the forum, played around on twitter, read through my google reader, sent a few emails to my pals: The Bitchin’ Bloggers, chatted with Moon on gchat about how Rob is clearly going to have a sexless summer- it was just another day at the office. I grabbed a quick bite to eat at my grandparent’s house where I kept my cell on vibrate. When I got out to my car I had a missed call and 2 texts from Moon. Plus a bajillion twitter updates. I called Moon immediately & from the moment she said hello until this very moment at 12:24 am, I have not stopped working on my “blog about vampires.” Just a normal Wednesday, or maybe today should go on the:

List of things that happen to me that make me think Twilight may be too big a part of my  life:

• I got 6 birthday cards this year and 4 of them had Robert Pattinson’s face on them

• My cousin, who is reading the books for the first time (yep- there are still virgins out there), texts me after she finishes every major section of a book and I call her immediately, making her rehash every feeling and emotion she is going through at that very moment, just so I can live vicariously through her first time. I miss my Twi-virginity so much

• Someone gave me a book about Rob Pattinson and encouraged me “not to read it all in one sitting” (little do they know I read the entire thing in 30 minutes the day it was released at Barnes & Noble)

• When I got my friendly monthly visitor in my white pajama pants, while going commando, instead of freaking out & looking around for the closest Tide detergent stick, I thought, “What was Stephanie Meyer’s answer for what Edward does when Bella gets her period again?”

• I can’t even get my husband to respond to my e-mail, yet Ted C. from E!Online has written me 3 times in the last 2 days.

• I write a blog about vampires that, for some reason, more people than I knew existed in the world read every day. Yesterday I only had 21 views on my personal blog.

• When discussing plans for a Twilight DVD ‘girls-night-in’ night over e-mail with some real life friends, one of the RL friend’s coworkers walks into her cube. She invites her to join us for the movie and she says, “Wait, UnintendedChoice is going to be there?” Someone actually called me UnintendedChoice. In my real life.

• My grandmother cuts out articles from the newspaper about Twilight and mails them to me

• People I haven’t talked to for years who should have no idea that I run this blog write on my Facebook wall, “I just wanted to let you know I started Twilight and I love it!” (Do they think I wrote it!?)
  secret msg about buttcrack santa
• I cropped a fannypack onto a man I never met (OH wait, that was Moon.. check it here)
  secret msg about buttcrack santa
• If I haven’t seen a friend in a week or two, the first question out of their mouth is not, “How have you been,” but it’s, “How is living in the Twilight world?”
  secret msg about buttcrack santa
• One of my best friends e-mailed me the other day and said “I feel like you have two lives. Real life UC & virtual life UC. I miss real life UC”
  secret msg about buttcrack santa
• When I get a company e-mail reminding me the IT guy is coming around to everyone’s office & doing geeky crap to our computers & I go to clear my history, I notice that it’s full of phrases like:

“Rob Pattinson Bite Baby” and “Rob Pattinson lobster”

• Because of that same IT guy I deleted my temporary files & download folder yesterday. It took 12 minutes. As I saw the file names zip past my eyes as they flew into the recycle bin, I realized not one was work-related.

• I accidentally start everything, from emails, to facebook wall posts, to work coorespondance, to post-it notes with “To do’s” for my husband, to blogs on my personal blog, to my rent checks, with Dear ___________ and sign it Love, UnintendedChoice. I, alone, am keeping the “white out” product on the market.

I may also be obssessed with this fact that I found out there used to be a petition to have TomStu play Edward. TOMSTU

What should I do? Pull back my involvement? Or do I just suck it up and say, “That’s Normal” I may or may not like Twilight

Love,
UnintendedChoice

PS: Add to list “The fact that I know who the hell TomStu is”

Okay confession time… what has happened to you to make you say… allright.. maybe I’m not that normal. (But oh! You are! That’s Normal)

Don’t forget to submit us some TwiPorn for our Porn-off with the Twilight Sisterhood

A million thanks to Calliope because without her, today’s post would have been a poll entitled “Who is hotter? Rob or Buttcrack Santa?”

Ashley Greene our new BFF

Dear Ashley,

Friday night was a night of amazing luck.  Not only did my flight get in 52 minutes early, but Moon BOOKED IT over to Hollywood after work (without eating any dinner- that’s commitment) got us tickets for your appearance at Hot Topic, picked me & the hubster up at LAX, and drove us BACK to Hollywood where we showed up at 10:04 and live twitted our entire evening’s experience. And though the night ended around 2am, I still had enough energy to drag my bag up Moon’s bajillion stairs into her house, even though it was 5am my time. Luck, I tell you…

Because we had tickets, we decided NOT to wait in the long-ass line of ticket holders since it was freezing and FAR away from the action. Instead we got up close and personal with all your fans and the camera crews waiting outside of the Hot Topic Store.  There we met some pretty great new Twi-friends (and made fun of and took pictures of some way weirdo Twi-fans) and got to be with Mini-Edward for his first MTV experience.  It was so fun being with all the hyped-up fans (minus the one girl who seriously needs to be kicked for her insane screaming fits) that we didn’t even mind waiting for you for two hours. Plus when you finally showed you were in this adorable red dress flashing your famous, gorgeous “Ashley Greene” smile that we didn’t even mind the crowd rushing us from behind and pushing us into the security gate. (Okay…we minded a little…)

After you went into Hot Topic we decided to be super smart and, again, forego the long-ass line and get us a midnight snack. Johnny Rockets rocks the fries at 12:15am.  By the time we were done, we jumped back at the end of the line, made it into Hot Topic within a 1/2 hour, snapped some adorable shots of you behind the counter, picked up our signed copies of the DVD & swooned over your adorable Twilight earrings (and after viewing some of the professional vids of you that night- we realize you didn’t show up with those earrings and must’ve put them on mid-evening… we’re guessing you were wearing a fan gift, which makes you even more bff-worthy in our minds).

Plus, we ended the night meeting the BEST Unicorn ever in line- Kynt from season 12 of The Amazing Race. He’s the biggest Twilight fan and we wanna invite him to our next sleepover with you and Rachelle, if that’s okay with you.

Really, not much could’ve made our night better (well, maybe 5-8 degrees, a soft comfy chair, 1 less screaming, crazy girl, & you coming 2 hours earlier serving us Rob on a platter). It was amazing and so wonderful to know without a doubt that you are the graceful, beautiful person you appear to be on screen, up close & personal!

Bffs already,
UnintendedChoice

Seriously, amazing night. I was high on adreneline and that’s the only reason I wasn’t falling asleep standing up. Thanks to Ashley Greene for being your adorable, awesome self. Thanks to Moon for not eating dinner and running all over town to ensure we had an amazing night- plus putting the Edward Cullen PillowCase on the bed to welcome me to your home. Thanks to JBell who is our best cheerleader on Twitter! Thanks to the hubster for sitting by himself for hours in downtown Hollywood and enduring the people pretending to be Jesus & Spiderman in the street. And thanks to Kynt, our new friend, who blogs here, and who was so fun to meet at 1-something in the am. Oh, and thanks to Rob Pattinson because you’re hot and… why the hell not?

Get Your Contest On!

Dear LTT/LTR Gals-

So we know all about the DVD preorders and what all those other stores are doing to celebrate in fact we’re in final countdown here including our OWN itinerary and tips for throwing a twi-party… but did you know WalMart is throwing their own Twilight release parties?! Well, they are so now you can celebrate with fellow Twi-hards, win contests, get your DVD AND buy toliet paper all at the same time! How thoughtful!

In honor of these fun parties we’re giving away one of the fun prize packs YOU could win if you go to a midnight release party, courtesy of Walmart! Now you know how we live to talk on these blogs… so in honor of our theme song video today, if you wanna win jump to the comments and share with us a song that makes you think of Twilight (doesn’t need to be on the Soundtrack) and YOU COULD WIN! We’ll announce a winner Tuesday.

Good luck and get to commenting!

XO
themoonisdown and unintendedchoice

Check out more at Walmart

Updated 3/18: Contest OVER. Thanks to EVERYONE who played and congrats to Brair Rose who was our randomly chosen winner! The song that makes her think of Twilight was Obsession by Animotion

Suggestions to celebrate the DVD release

Dear LTT readers, Twihards & Twilighters,

We were e-mailing with one of our readers the other day, and she shared with us her plans for the evening of March 21st- the day the Twilight DVD is released, of course. We loved her Twilight DVD Release Party ideas SO MUCH that we just had to share them with you.

Celebrating the Twilight DVD Release
by RhoJo and her amazing friends

1. We’re getting pizza because that’s what Charlie would do
2. We’re having vampire cookies (see recipe here)
3. We’re making vampire venom jello shots (they’ll get you loaded and pregnant!)
4. And it wouldn’t be a Twilight DVD Release Party without a Twilight Drinking Game: (Click the images to make them bigger!)

a

Thanks to you and your amazing friends, RhoJo, Moon & I will be NICE & tipsy together on Saturday the 21st. Yep, you heard me right. That wasn’t a mistake. We will be TOGETHER watching the DVD and doing vampire venom jello shots everytime someone says the word “monkey.” Nothing says “I gotta jump in a plane and fly 2393 miles across the country to see my partner in Twi-crime” like the Twilight DVD release and the thought of vampire cookies. Jump on over to LTR to check out the itinerary we have planned while we’re together.

a

To the rest of you: what are you doing the night of the DVD release (or the night before- Midnight release party?) Let us know and SEND US PICTURES afterwards!

a

Love,
UnintendedChoice & theMoonisDown

Do you know we have a site dedicated to Rob?

Hey LTT readers,

You know we have a site dedicated to Rob, right? If you didn’t know that, GO THERE RIGHT NOW!!

It’s especially important that you head there since it’s currently showing a deleted scene from Twilight. 

KThxBai,

UC & Moon