With all the hub-bub of the past fews days we’re already gotten behind on all the Eclipse info starting to come out. FINALLY! But I guess I gotta say I’m glad they didn’t kill us with stuff from the movie like they did with New Moon. Let’s hope this less-is-more approach holds out for the next month.
Tons of new videos, clips and commercials are out and we gotta talk about some of these, so I thought we could do a few mini letters within a letter
Dear Nikki and Kristen,
Why do I get the feeling this whole scene was actually not taken from the movie but was in reality a conversation between you two while you waited to be called to set? The obvious disdain for each other is oddly reminiscent of your rumored ex-friendship. You girls went from fake lesbian lovers who were more interested in each other than actual boys to never being seen in public together again, rumored screaming fights, and greek shipping heir boyfriends. What happened here? What it really all about “the choice” like the tagline the Eclipse marketers want to shove down our throats?
Did you, Kristen have the choice between Oregano and Rob while Nikki sat on the sideline hoping you’d stay with the Italian spice so she could slide in with the new guy. But instead you dropped the old news for the new flavor of the week. Must have been a sad day for you Nikki when you were ousted from the “family.” And all because of KStew’s choice. Word to the wise for next time Nikki, don’t push the hand of the 19yr old on the freshmen team. Just sit back and watch her crumble under the pressure of trying to play in the varity league with the big girls, but instead you gamed too hard and effectively had the choice made for you. Rookie mistake my friend. Stick around, let the big girls show you how it’s done.
Varsity Team!
Moon
PS Girls, these wigs need readjusting the hair lines are lower than my pantyhose after the elastic’s shot.
FINALLY, the first single from the soundtrack is due out TODAY! MTV will be debuting the video for Neutron Star Collision.
(enjoy this creeper photo for 3ish minutes)
Dear Muse,
You guys are SO over the top I can’t help but love you. What’s better for this dazzling, balls to the wall, romantic, idealistic saga then you guys bellowing over galloping guitars, bombastic piano lines and drum loops? NOTHING. Sadly, this will probably just be over the closing credits since that always seems to be the place they stick the lead single from these movies. But if I was in charge I’d make Bill Condon come in early and stage some huge over the top musical number. Think: dancing werewolves, twirling police officers, fountains of spurting blood in the background and glitter falling from the heavens on Bella and Edward. Best scene ever. DONE.
Jazz Hands!
Moon
Dear Vitamin Water Ad geniuses-
Are you people serious? Like really? My cat “Forks?” My bodies free radical “Victorias?”
Just don’t, Ok?
As “normal” fans we deal with people thinking we’re crazy already just because we like Twilight, we don’t need a national television spot perpetuating the assumption that we’re all camping out for Eclipse with glitter in our pockets. What I’m sure you want to come off as funny comes off as condescending. I’m all for making fun of the crazies in the world, but I don’t need another thing I have to explain to people as a false assumption about all fans. I’ve already got my hands full with the Twimom fiasco from Oprah.
Why don’t you hire a new creative agency to actually come up with something fresh/funny instead of tired material about the fans? WE can make fun of fans because WE ARE FANS. You are not. Catch the difference?
Thanks, but NO THANKS.
Moon
PS If you’d like to try again by sending me a case of Essential and Power C I may cut you a little slack. JUST SAYIN’
So did anyone else get the totally art imitating life vibe from that NReed/KStew video? And seriously, the Vitamin Water ad? Embarrassing!
LAST DAY TO ENTER!!! Wanna win a tshirt from our new LTT Store? Our “In 20 years” Contest is going on until Thursday! Read all about it & then get your entries sent in!
Why the crap did you have to step in between the boys about to fight? They were about to go at it, maybe rip some shirts off or make some grunting sounds and you stepped in the middle of it all! Uh, thanks man! Why’d you have to go and be a narc? I mean sure you’re a cop and all but seriously dude, throw us a bone. Go crack down on grannies making moonshine on the rez or maybe go undercover to catch shoplifters at Newton’s outfitters, we don’t need you stepping in between a couple of hot pieces about ready to scrap. Duh.
Oh and Edward, get angry more often, that’s so flipping hot.
45 days!
Themoonisdown
HAPPY WEEKEND! Congrats to my cousin LondonCalling for graduating college this weekend!
Why is boys fighting hot? I still don’t get it. Especially because in real life it’s really scary! I’m a baby.
Um, by now I’m sure you know our crazy love for the soundtracks and breaking them down like a nutjob to the infinite degree, so of course you know we’re waiting with bated breath for you to release the hounds the tracklisting today. BUT being good followers of Stephenie Meyer you’ve mastered the art of the cock block and want to guarantee repeat visits, you have decided to release ONE TRACK an hour starting at 8AM Pacific Time (holla WEST COAST!) today on MYSPACE. Now, MYSPACE?! That’s another letter for a whole other day (or year), but COME ON!!! So now this is how it’s going to work, I’m going to be updating this letter through out the day to include all the latest announcements and artists on the sound track and hopefully give you some samples and scene ideas I think they might use the song in…
Until then let’s start with what we know and then some guesses…
Lead single…
Muse: Neutron Star Collision (Love is Forever) – Besides having the best name ever and being SMeyer’s ladyboner band, I’m secretly hoping they use that picture of the Edward Cullen Neutron of the Shire as the single cover. Here’s a total cockblock of a sample of Neutron Star Collision (Love is Forever) (say that ten times fast! you will be tested June 30).
Why yes, what a lovely piano tinkling sound.
*updated: supposed leak of the song HERE doesn’t sound like the same key, but I’ll let you decide*
Jesse & Joy: Magic & Desire – This was reported by Eclipse Movie (and some others but we love our bb Eclipse Movie) that Jesse and Joy, a latin band would be contributing a song to the soundtrack. This makes me wonder two things… where is this going to end up in the soundtrack? Maybe a Jasper/Maria scene? Or is this song only on Soundtracks in Latin America, since we learned that certain tracks only make it onto soundtracks in specific world areas. We shall see!
Jesse & Joy – Mi Sol
Love the totally emo graphics the video maker used. ANARCHY!!!!
This is quite beautiful and now I’m even more convinced whatever “Magic & Desire” is it will be included on a Latin America only version of the soundtrack. If Jessie & Joy had been more Rodrigo y Gabriella flavored I might be more inclined to think it could be for a certain scene but now I’m not so sure. Unless they do an english language song (like ‘And then there was you’ below) Dang, listen to these guys! They’re great!
1. Metric – “Eclipse (All Yours)”
UC will be jumping for joy with the news that Metric will be on the Soundtrack. Her fake lesbian lover is Emily Haines.
Metric can kinda go either way with the up beat stuff or the more ballad-y songs… should be interesting and good call on just being obvious and titling the song Eclipse. Lest we forget what movie this is for…
Other Metric: Help I’m Alive, Twilight Galaxy (heh, someones a fan!)
2. Muse: Neutron Star Collision (Love is Forever)
OMG! didn’t see this one coming…see above…
3. The Bravery – “Ours”
The Bravery are super upbeat and rocky, this is a fun inclusion though they’re not rock in the traditional sense this could be something at the graduation party or maybe a cool chase or driving scene
4. Florence and the Machine – Heavy In Your Arms
So quality. I just saw Florence on Live at Abbey Road sessions the other day and can’t wait to hear “Heavy In Your Arms” she can really howl… speaking of…
Howl from Florence and the Machine
She such a strong female it almost makes me want to think about someone like Leah or maybe when Bella grows a pair…
5. Sia – My Love
Now we all know everyone’s love affair with her song “Breathe Me” which was probably the best ever synch on 6 Feet Under a few years back but call me crazy I want to see some whacky Sia… or like Zero 7 Sia!
6. Fanfarlo – Atlas If I wasn’t freaking before I defs am now! Welcome to one of my favorite bands! UGH! Amazing. I usually don’t fan girl out over Twilight (says the girl who writes a blog about Twilight), but we’re talking the MUSIC, and it’s GOOD music!
UPDATED:
Atlas performed live earlier this year. (Thanks Lula!)
7. The Black Keys – “Chop And Change”
Oh the Black Keys you are great…
(For Carter)
8. The Dead Weather – “Rolling in on a Burning Tire”
Dayum finally some (probably) hard ass music. Jack White kills in yet another side project band. We all know from David Slade’s tweets he had a director boner for them while filming in Vancouver, so good on him for making it happen. And besides anyone who names an album “Whorehound” is good peoples.
Alison Mosshart is a badass bitch throw her in with Jack and some others from Queens of the Stone Age and the Rancetouers and this is a SUPER group!
9. Beck and Bat For Lashes – “Let’s Get Lost”
UMMMM as we saw from the Bon Iver / St. Vincent track from New Moon this collaboration could be redonkulous. Though I haven’t been a huge Beck fan for the last album or so I LOVE his album Sea Changes and couple that with my lady lover Natasha Khan (aka Bat for Lashes) and we have the makings of something that could be awesome!
Natasha will creep you out in the best way possible with What’s A Girl To Do?
10. Vampire Weekend – “Jonathan Low”
If UC would be peeing her pants over Metric, I will be peeing my pants over Vampire Weekend. Heck yea Ezra is my lover! I’ve kinda always hoped they’d end up on a Twilight soundtrack but knew it might be a slim chance because of the kitsch factor with the name but HALLELUJAH we have some Vampire Weekend!
Now VW can go both ways (TWSS) and I love them for it. They have a very, (I’m reluctant to use the word) ‘world’ ish vibe to their music that is very danceable but then they can lay on the sweet jams. Because I love them so I’m giving you some extras here!
Giving up the gun
Probs my fave VW song ever… California English Pt 2
11. UNKLE – “With You In My Head (featuring The Black Angels)” Brit band of greatness…
Be There
12. Eastern Conference Champs – “A Million Miles An Hour”
Hey, Philly folks here’s a band from your neck of the woods and one I don’t know much about so let’s take a listen…
13. Band of Horses – “Life on Earth”
Who wants the sads? These boys bring them with their music. Need a fix before June 8th, their new album comes out next Tuesday!
The Funeral
One of my fave songs from back in the day, used to listen to this when I drove to work.
14. Cee-Lo Green – “What Part Of Forever”
WWWHHHAAATTT>>!! CEE-LO GREEN?! Shit just got REAL interesting! For those not in the know, Cee-Lo is the other half of Gnarls Barkley and original member of Goodie Mob and boy can he SANG. Not just sing, SANG. Shall this be some sorta romantic soul moment? Engagement anyone? ORRR ORRR maybe the big kiss off between Bella and Jacob?! God that would be gut wrenchingly awesome!
Who’s gonna save my soul (Gnarls Barkley)
Cee-Lo is soul through and through but it’s soul that’s taken a ride on a space ship.
15. Howard Shore – “Jacob’s Theme” Dude, this is the guy who wrote the Lord of the Rungs score, I think we’re gonna be in good hands!
The Shire
I REALLY loved Alexandre Desplat’s Jacob’s Theme so I’m interested to see if Howard keeps any of the same tone or theme or does a whole new theme… we do get a different Jacob in Eclipse after all
Who will NOT make the cut… 100 Monkeys – They couldn’t write a song that wasn’t improvised, so every song they tried to record was different and NO ONE wanted to hear a song about a wolf threesome, Mrs. Cope’s menopause or what’s for lunch in the Forks High School Cafeteria. For serious.
Anyone from the Brit Pack, Sage, Mitch Hanson whoever, etc etc – For obvious reasons, do we even need to go into this?
Robert Pattinson – because he’s a big pansy and can’t put on his big boy Marks & Spencer underwear and give us a flippin’ song! UGH.
I’ve got my fingers and toes and legs and whatever else I can cross, crossed that this soundtrack will be as freaking awesome as the New Moon Soundtrack was. That soundtrack blew ours and every other music lover/snobs socks off and now that Alex Patsavas and the Twilight crew can demand original content from HUGE, awesome, credible artists I really can’t contain myself to see what kind of coup her and her team pulls off for Eclipse.
IS IT JUNE 8TH YET?!
Themoonisdown
Yes, I will be updating this as we find out the artists on the soundtrack and giving you the 411 and some tracks to listen to! Get excited! I am!!!!!! I live for this stuff! Any favorites or speculation you want to throw out there? What artists do you think are perfect for Eclipse?
It’s time again… tons of tid bits of interesting info but not enough time to write letters about it all. That means it’s time for a news dump. We’ll let you know what we think about the news and you decide from there if you care that much about 100 Monkeys or how Tyler Houseman’s promo shoot turned out.
If these pictures had a scratch-n-sniff function this post about Jackson and 100 Monkeys playing at Bamboozle would smell like BO, ear hair, vomit, a melted Slurpee, an ash tray full of wet cigarettes, a used sweat towel from Jr High gym class, and melted Depp hair gel. Yup, EXACTLY what it would smell like.
Bill Condon is announced as the director for Breaking Dawn. No word on whether it will be one or two movies or 3D or not lame but he writes fans a letter and does get a few things right, he addresses us all as twihards, Twilight fans and Twilight Moms. *RECORD SCRATCH* ummm… BILL? We’re gonna need to talk about this later
David Slade got into the #goo stuff Monday night and tweeted till he got the munchies and left. IN THE FUTURE disable all communication devices before lighting up. Just ask La Stew.
Probably one of the causes of Slade’s online hissy fit, Lainey Gossip posted lots and lots of gossip and speculation about what REALLY went on behind the scenes of the Eclipse reshoots or as officials are calling them “pick ups.” Personally, I’d like to think the cause of all the hub-bub is actually because of the helicopters Punk’d Images hired to get these grainy ass photos of Bella and Jacob out on a dock somewhere… speaking of wasn’t I just talking about Vancouver and docks?
The New York City paparazzi show us that they’re big fans off LTT by yelling the most amazing comment ever at Kristen while on the Met Gala red carpet… witness and then crazy Krisbians you can yell at me in the comments
We’ll leave it up to you to decide whether that’s a curtain or a table cloth around the bottom of her dress
Biiiiiitch please, I gotta tattoo
Promo shots for Eclipse are starting to circulate around the nets of The Cullens, The Holy Trinity and The Wolfpack. For what it’s worthy Leah has the best bitchface and rack hands down.
NOKIA Theater was announced as the place for the Eclipse premiere, and then it wasn’t and then everyone was confused. And then it was back at Grauman’s Chinese Theater like it was supposed to be all along.
Robert Pattinson still loves to choke a bitch out. And wear incredibly tight, ball hugging, high waisted pants. We love it. We don’t.
Yup, that’s the news… I’m still thinking about Bree and being called a Twi-hard by Bill Condon…
IN THE FUTURE the news will be beamed to our brains. THE FUTURE IS NOW!
Themoonisdown
So what do you think about Leah’s bitchface? Amazing, right? And her hot ass tatt. Has anyone gone to a recent 100 Monkeys concert? Did I get the smell right? It’s been quite a while for me.
Yes, I’m writing you about the Eclipse trailer that premiered on Oprah on Friday. Since you’re outta the country without a lifeline internet connection, I am by myself! Who am I supposed to talk to about the trailer? I feel like I’m all alone! Ok, maybe not we have a billion friends and blog readers, but still it’s just not the same! I feel like I’m cheating. I keep looking over my shoulder because I think you’re gonna walk in and catch me breaking it down with someone else. Well, I did and it was goooood. It wasn’t you and me but it was gooooood. And so is the trailer. There’s lots to discuss. The ring, The Riley, The Circle of Life… LET’S DO THIS!!!!
Moon: Brookie, we need to break down this trailer PRONTO! UC has gone south of the border, Calli is drunker than Cathi Hardwicke at TGIFriday’s all you can drink Cinco De Mayo celebration and The Font won’t answer my calls. It’s just you and me girl. You, me and some questionable hairlines.
Brooke: lemme watch again I love how the trailer starts off with Bella wearing a hoodie like it isn’t already the 800 pound gorilla in the room let’s hide the hideous wig under a hoodie. NO ONE will notice
Moon: HAHAHAHAAH exactly its so obvious they tightened the shot to keep her hairline out of like 3/4ths of the shots in the trailer. COME ON!
Brooke: I also don’t get who in the make up department has it out for rob
Dude, tell me before she shows up... do I look like Caspar?
Brooke: he’s a funking gorgeous guy and yet he looks closer to Ronald McDonald than Edward Cullen
Moon: some poor girl who thought he turned her down during the filming of twilight and it just turns out he was so embarrassed he was mumbling Brooke: hahaha, he probably proposed and she took it seriously she probably breaks make up brushes every time she has to do K’s makeup Moon: Wouldn’t you?
Follow the cut to feast on some Riley, talk about Ronald McDonald and Raves Continue reading →
We’ve been with you for awhile now and over the past year and 4 months we’ve talked about a lot. A lot of themes and characters have come and gone. Some people who were SO vital to our – err- organization are like distant memories. Today we begin a new series where we dig into the past and find out whatever happened to… whoever we’ve sadly stopped talking about. First on today’s list…..
Buttcrack Santa
After his wild success playing the role of “Buttcrack Santa” in Twilight in 2008, Ned Bellamy went on to star as a secondary, mostly-forgotten character in a few episodes of 2 different, barely watched television shows and as the highly popular character named “Cabinet Member” in the television series 24. No- I got that wrong. He was the “character name “Cabinet Member” in the highly popular television series 24. He has not yet worked in 2010.
Just in time for Christmas! This is what I think happened during the “butt-crack Santa incident”. Written in Waylon’s POV One-shot.
Seeing Bella all grown up reminded me of the last time I saw her. It was Christmas. Charlie brought four-year-old Bella to a Christmas party. I decided to suprise the kids and dress up like Santa Clause. Well, the suit was a little big, so I stuffed it with a few pillows.
At about seven o’clock, I came out to give out the presents. All the kids lit up, especially Bella. I gave out all the presents from under the tree. There was one last present left, but the bow was stuck on a branch. I bent down to get it unstuck and I heard some giggling. I thought it was just from getting the present caught on the tree, but Bella blurted out, “Ew! Butt crack!” Everyone laughed. I pulled the sagging Santa pants up and finally got the present unstuck and gave it to it’s owner. The rest of the party went fine, but I didn’t get up from the couch the rest of the night. When Charlie was about to leave to take Bella home, he patted me on the back and said, “Good job, butt-crack Santa.” Bella giggled and they went home.
A.N.: Now, wasn’t that a good holiday Pick-me-up? Now click that little green button below and give me a nice, tasty review!
Once known for their ability to write a hit song about an every day object found in the puffy-painted canvas tote of a fan club member, the 100 Monkeys have seemed quiet as of late. Or has it just been our incredible lack of care for Jackson Rathbone as compared to the other cast members like we were accused of in a recent fan letter:
Hooray- a way for you to make up for your inexcusable neglect of Jackson Rathbone- have you been covering the 100 City tour? did you have pictures of the black eye? did you write about the Hard Rock Las Vegas brouhaha? have you shown us awesome Last Airbender trailers? noooo it’s all about Kellen in underwear ads and Taylor’s father for some unfathomable reason.
Anyway here’s your chance to make it all up. Jackson and the 100 Monkeys will be in Philadelphia April 8th at the North Star and it would be lovely if you would attend and tell us about it.
Coco
secret
Unfortunately I was busy on April 8th ogling pictures of Kellan Lutz in his undewear and photoshopping Big Daddy Lautner getting stuck in the drive thru window of a McDonalds and couldn’t make the show. However, maybe in a few years I’ll think about attending one again after my ears heal from the last time I saw the band in Philadelphia.
secret
However, in keeping with the theme of “Whatever happened to” and in no way writing this to appease Coco (even though I love nothing more than to bend over backwards for someone’s bitchy request), I did some research on the band. The Monkeys now have a pretty cool-looking website and seem to still run around town with Marty the Bananager. They are reconsidering his role in the band as the banana suit smells so bad that it’s actually keeping the girls away. This spring the band is on a 100 city tour and Jackson latest “look” is turning me- normally a lover of hippie, dirty rock boys- into a lesbian. Their music is just as bad- if not worse- than when I first saw them a year ago. Believe me, I just spent the last 5 minutes listening to clips of their songs on the “100 Monkeys Jukebox” praying for something I could tolerate. I came up empty handed.
secret
On the new website, there is a “Chatter” section where their fans can discuss the latest color of puffy paint to use on their canvas Monkey bag & share with each other (and hope that the band will take a peek too) the most recent art inspired by the band. For example:
This beautiful masterpiece
Or this- the best Jackson has looked in 2 whole years:
(I actually like this- shhh don't tell)
And I’m so happy to have finally found Moon’s birthday present:
Where the EFF have I been? I’ve missed some GREAT videos over the past year or so.
Starting with this BRILLIANT video from the fall that apparently 1,000,000 other people saw:
Spider Monkey with Grandma Bella? Carlisle’s voice!? Jasper’s hair? The Radiohead knock-off at the end and “They do in my world?” AMAZING!
This video from forever ago makes me sad & now I want to READ the book again!
And we may have posted this before but if we did not- SHAME on us becuase it’s so brilliant. And watch it again if we already posted it because.. well, it’s SO Brilliant:
I love weekend videos! Happy Weekending!
Love,
UnintendedChoice
If you are new or haven’t been around in awhile, a few weeks back Moon & I decided to stop posting on the weekends & instead post an “OPEN POST” on Saturdays that stays up until Monday morning. That way you can chat if you want, enjoy something short & funny and then get back to important stuff…. until the Twilight world picks up again. Then Moon & I will be back to wasting your time on the weekends! If you’re super bored…. I’m gonna pick a random post for you to read or re-read. How about from…… May 17, 2010? I have no idea what this is: Bad case of Lovin’ Dr. Cullen
You’re finally out of those teen years and into what I refer to as the “old years” everything after teens just doesn’t really matter so much as you’ll find out. But alas you’re only 20 and you’re in that weird year that isn’t teen and isn’t fully adult. But it’s been a big year for you. Leaving behind your teens and entering adulthood has been pretty tumultuous to say the least. To celebrate let’s take a look back and see what all 19 had to offer…
After outting you and Nikki Reed as fake lesbians one of our friends Kim made this amazing video to celebrate your love and we laughed till we cried.
And as quickly as your love blossomed with NReed your love for that Italian spice Oregano ended. In a last ditch effort to salvage the relationship and and Micheal Aranago embark on a not staged at all paparazzi documented piggy back romp through the streets of Vancouver. Goodbye Stewgano, we barely knew ye.
While Rob was off in Cannes he runs into your old Into the Wild costar Emile Hirsch and UC and I roleplay what that conversation must have been like. We also come up with our own safeword for future role playing. We also have amazing fun real lives outside of this blog, I SWEAR!
Obviously out of my mind I plead with you to bone Robert Pattinson while you’re filming New Moon in Italy. You probably took my advice. Or you didn’t and played some softball with the locals.
What else happened last year? Let’s remember and wish KStew a happy happy 20th after the cut! Continue reading →
This weekend’s Open Postis hosted by none other than TWEED DAY. Yes- THAT’S RIGHT!!! Today you don’t need an excuse to put on your tweed and have a good time. It’s actually a national holiday (who cares for which nation) Directly from a very random website:
When : Always April 3rd
Tweed Day celebrates one of two things. Either it celebrates the warm, fashionable woolen clothing that originated in Scotland. Seemingly always in fashion, Tweed keeps you warm and looks good, too. It should come as no surprise to learn that tweed is more popular in the north, and not often worn in the south.
Or,…it celebrates the birthday of a corrupt , New York City politician.
Are you saying “what the?” like we are? Read all about it here. We don’t really care about the traditional celebration of National Tweed Day. Today let’s celebrate our favorite man in tweed, Edward Cullen:
Sigh… so Grandpa-ish yet so hot. Thanks Claudia for the heads up!
But OH! We’re not done. Because this weekend is a holiday weekend and sometimes we feel generous on holidays, this open post is hosted by SOMEONE ELSE too. It is hosted by angry men who have lost their women to Twilight…
(Seriously I know this song is SO bad, but just get through it- it’s worth it!!)
When I first saw this video I was just STRUCK with how similar the lives of Twilight lovers are. Sure we look different, act different and ARE different… but at the end of the day… we’ve given up a HUGE chunk of our lives and dedicated it to this VAMPIRE story… much to the dismay of the men in our lives! I laughed so hard because I seriously think my husband has had the exactly conversation or complaint of me like in this video at least once a day for the last year and 1/2 (without the awful music!)
Hoppy Easter, enjoy passover or just have a good weekend!
Love,
UnintendedChoice
Thanks again Claudia & thanks to Jennifer for the video!!
You’re just TOO good, too full of lol’s and wtf’s for us to let you pass by without breaking it down. All 5+ minutes. Yup, we’re breaking down the Eclipse sneak peek and away we go…
Moon: ok here it is!
UC: let’s mother effing DO THIS Moon: Wait, DUDE the little chocolatiers promo AGAIN!i love it.ok, I’m ready UC: DAMN RILEY IS HOT Moon: dude im so glad they got someone on etsy to make the clacker thingy that marks in the time for a scene UC: aww david slade- so small, gay… short.. Moon: ps same cinematopgrapher as NM just saw that. so there will be SOME sort of continuity
UC: KELLAN HAS MAN BOOBS, I stopped it ON HIS BIG ASS BOOBS that are bigger than mine Moon: THERES SO MUCH What, where are the boobs!? UC: Haha he stands up like 29/30 major boobage Moon: why is kellan wearing an off the shoulder top? UC: I HAVE THAT SHIRT Moon: like he took his sweatshirt and cut off the neckband UC: he was at an 80s party earlier that day Moon: he should be jazzercising or getting “physical” with Olivia Newton John and not kicking nomad vampire ass UC: he needs a bra Moon: you think he does that exercise from Judy Blume novels? “i must i must i must increase my bust” at night since like vampires dont sleep and he has nothing else to do UC: yes, and it works but not for me. He has a perfect woman. with a big bust herself and he’s jealous she’s not always there… for him to caress the chest so … he grew his own Moon: hahaha he can feel himself up c
wait, Victoria's after BELLA?!
Moon: i just want to hear xaviers voice again. he better have a big part in the press for this UC: um i think he will. look at his face it’s hot UC: okay… this is seriously beating a dead horse…poor horse…but can we once and for all get it out of our system and LAMENT over Kristen’s awful wig? Moon: HAHAHA and bryce’s while we’re at it. I feel bad she had to do an interview wearing it Moon: at 38 she and david slade are having the most intense staring contest. i bet she won UC: i THINK that Taylor just found out WHY victoria is upset he’s like…. “Bella is the reason that victoria is mad. SHe basically KILLED james” he had like a lightbulb go off in this interview.. Moon: he’s like DUDE thats why??!! and he turns around to ask kristen off camera and shes like DUH, haven’t you read this crap yet? So they cut to her and Kristen’s has to explain it UC: nope- he’s too busy with his ka-rah-tay to have actually read the books c Follow the cut for threesomes, Rob running on the hampster wheel and the REAL story behind Eclipse Continue reading →
Letters to Twilight 