One cannot exist on Twilight alone

To Catherine Hardwicke, Chris Weitz, David Slade & whoever has the horrific job of making Renesmee come to life on the big screen,

A Warning not to mess with Twihards:

charcoalvolvoMoon: Can you EFFING believe David Slade and the props department for Eclipse? I mean, do they think we’re blind or something?! That Volvo is CHARCOAL! CHARCOAL!!
UC: I know, I mean.. that’s almost as bad as if Harry Clearwater had famous SHRIMP FRY or something
Moon: Or Newton’s ran a SHOE store and not an outfitters. Helllloooo we’re fans- We’re the readers. We’re gonna know this stuff!
UC: Do they think we’re Vampire Diaries fans or something? Ugh

Guys- learn from Cathy the Cougar’s mistakes. There were soooo many inconsistencies between Twilight the book and Twilight the movie.

  • In the book, Bella’s first day at Forks High School is on January 19. In the film, her first day is in March. This is a MAJOR issue. MAJOR problems could happen because of the different dates. I can’t think of any right now, but I know it’s a MAJOR big deal.
  • Cabinet color fail. But love the 'stache

    Cabinet color fail. But love the 'stache

    Bella’s mom painted the kitchen cabinets YELLOW to bring ‘sunshine’ to Forks. The cabinets in the movie were WHITE. WHITE! What would it cost? Like $3.00 paint them yellow? You could’ve made Rob eat what craft services made for 3-4 days and cut his hot pocket budget back to make up for the lost $3.00.

  • And in the movie when Bella entered Biology class and talked to Eric about getting her playlist for prom, she started to walk then pauses to look across the room towards Edward. In this shot the Armadillo is not on the shelf, and only what looks like a piece of paper is hanging there. Then the Armadillo appears on the shelf only after she has sat down at her desk and Edward moves the microscope towards Bella saying “Ladies first”. What is WRONG with you? Did you remember the Armadillo and then FORGET the armadillo? What? Are yo- NO! NO! How, I don’t even know what you’re say- How Ho- Whadya whayda you talking about, yo- want me to go away- I, I, I can’t, I can’t I I can’t just leave – I just don’t even know what to say….
  • And I was extremely offended by Bella’s outfit in the movie when she goes to meet the Cullens for the first time.  Jeans, a green top & a jacket? How do you think Old Navy felt when they saw that? They stocked up on khaki skirts in every store expecting to sell out because girls would want to look like Bella from the movie. They didn’t even sell one (oh wait- Cathy the Cougar bought one because she felt bad) Old Navy ended up donating them all to some orphanage in Russia. Those poor Russian girls (and boys)… walking around in mid-nineties styles.
  • When Bella sees Jacob at the prom in the movie, he hasn’t grown significantly like in the book. Why!? WHY would you do that to us Cathy the Cougar? Did you not read the book? Jacob is supposed to grow! Jacob is a WEREWOLF! Werewolves aren’t small little baby boys. WHY!?
  • Speaking of the prom, WHERE were the rest of the Cullen kids? This is a BIG DEAL that they weren’t there! A BIG DEAL.

Chris, David, poor chap who will have to make a fake baby look real, we’re fasting & praying that you do better than SHE did…… And to YOU, David Slade…. how dare you make the Volvo CHARCOAL. Chris… I better not find out that you make the Newton Outfitters employee vest YELLOW instead of Orange.

High expectations,
UnintendedChoice

How we really feel after the jump

In case you can’t tell (you definitely need to read this article, if that’s the case) I really don’t care about the color of Edward’s Volvo. I care about my friends, world peace, vintage dresses & that Edward is so breathtakingly handsome I try to hump the movie screen. Black Volvo, Blue Volvo, Purple Volvo, I could care less. I wanna cry in New Moon & miss Edward so badly, and I better see a leg hitch in Eclipse. AND the kiss with Jacob better be so hot that I consider switching teams for a second.  Yes, I’m talking to you, Kristen Stewart. You better bring it so bad that I forget to utter “legal in Georgia” and instead utter “UCsten”

The real conversation:

UC: Black Volvo? Are people freaking?
Moon:
Yes. CALM the eff down. It’s a car he got out of. and WHO CARES. It’s like yellow cupboards all over again
UC
: Ugh… things we don’t care about: the color of cupboards. The color of cars.
Moon
: Get your priorities in order people. I just want the major plot points to be covered
UC
: Things we should care about our friends, world peace, health care reform, and how hot Rob looks. If they decide black is better.. it’s for a reason
Moon
: exactly it’s SOMEONE ELSE’S artistic vision of what the movie looks like not an EXACT replica of Steph’s saga- PLUS Volvo may have said “here’s what we have take it” I care about going grocery shopping right now cause I have nothing in my cupboards and not about the color of Bella’s jacket. One cannot exist on Twi alone…

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Sources (aka people who have WAY too much time on their hands alert) Twilight wiki and Movie Mistakes

Pic Source & Source

223 Responses

  1. LOL!!!
    Were people seriously freaking over white cupboards???
    It’s so nice to have the hype and excitement before the film, I didn’t have that last time.
    But seriously people, pick your battles.
    Like you chicas said, as long as they include those CRITICAL moments we’ll be fine!

    xox

    • Jodie…you have no clue the chaos that broke out on twitter when pics surfaced of the black volvo…you would’ve thought pics of Cougar Cathy blowing Rob hard surfaced!!! LMAO 😀 I totes agree with ya btw…pick your battles!!

      • P.S.
        SO SORRY Jayde17 totes mispelled your name…my bad!! *big hugs*

      • Uh… I’m totally lamespice (or have you gals changed it to lamesauce because I’m seeing awesomesauce all over the place now) anyways… I’m totally lame bc I never saw the freak out over a black or charcoal Volvo. This is the first I’ve heard of it. I’m soooo out of the loop. Last “twitter freak out” that I knew of was the half naked Rob pics from the fountain scene. Maybe I don’t freak out so easily.

        In the words of The Yorkster, “Chillax, people”… it’s just a car.

        M

        PS – The whole thing did make me lmao. =]

  2. Don’t forget that the biology teacher Mr.Banner was suddenly transformed into a hyperactive Mr.Molina. And he wasn’t even funny like Buttcrack Santa. Ok, except maybe for the golden onion.

    Shrimp fry… I think I bit my lip to bleeding trying not to laugh out loud at the office!

  3. “Werewolves aren’t small little baby boys.”

    lol

    Apparently small little baby girls are dating material though.

  4. No matter the color, one can still get the needed alliteration when saying stupid, shiny Volvo.

    And they’re not wasting finite resources.

    • maybe it’s a GREEN volvo people! hydrogen fueled!! theyre updating the saga and saving the world like the cullens would have been down for!

  5. The cupboards were white?! I thought everything in that movie was blue!

  6. I just wish they’d get him a sportier damn Volvo…seriously he might be 107 years old, but damnit he is not a middle-aged mom (and I AM a mom and I wouldn’t drive an almost station wagon, crossover crap)

    • THANK you. I realize that when one mentions “sexy cars”, Volvo is not the first make that comes to mind, but the car Edward was driving in the first movie looked like a hatchback. I don’t want to make out in a hatchback. They do make Volvos that I would want to make out in, and I wish they’d put one in a freaking Twilight movie. If that charcoal one doesn’t have a fold out bed in the back, it’s going to bug me during the movie, no matter what color it is.

      • For the record, I would totally make out in a hatchback.

        • Me too! As long as it was Rob, uhh I mean Edward…

        • I have actually “made out” in a hatchback…in the drivers seat. Picture it, we’re alone, secluded spot, I was driving, so the guy climbs on top, then moves a bit and….and….HONKS THE HORN WITH HIS ASS!!!!

          Never, I repeat, Never make out in a hatchback.

          • I think hatchbacks are popular w/ new drivers. My 1st car was a hatchback, a Geo Metro. LOL. Yeah I guess that’s why parents get it…it deters makeout sessions. LOL.

      • Maybe they should take our advice and just go all the way with “Eddie’s Van”. Fold out bed in the back and everything! I am totally making out in “Eddie’s Van”!!

    • Thank you. I always thought it was way uncool for Edward to be driving a station wagon even if he does have to cart the rest of the Cullen kids around.

    • But seriously, from a car nerd perspective, Stephenie put him in a pretty sweet ride. The Volvo S60R is a really obscure model reference, and the “R” is quite important, as SM makes note. It’s fitting for Edward’s character–all the cars are fitting for their characters if you really think about it. It’s not overtly ostentatious, but it’s uncommon. Stephenie gives a shout out to her brothers, Paul and Jacob, in the acknowledgments (and website) for their car expertise/suggestions. Yay Paul and Jacob for making the books that much more enjoyable! (except for did they really have to let her put in the yellow 911 turbo? how cliche! ugh. (sorry SM, I love me a 911 turbo, but they’re just so overused…i actually cringed while reading))

      To the point, the Volvo C30 they used in the movie…NOT A FOUR DOOR SEDAN! Hello!!!! Such an obvious fail. Anyway, the C30 is lame compared to the S60R and, go figure, totally not Edward’s character. If you can’t get the S60R, and that’s understandable, at least get a car that translates! Good book to screen adaptation means you lose some details, but you keep the overall theme. Edward is not a C30 and he never was and he certainly never will be.

      What I want to see is Jacob’s VW Rabbit! Hooray.

      Oh, and whoever said that regardless of color the line “Stupid, shiny Volvo” still holds its form: so true. Such a great line, too. I always have to read it aloud when I get to it (but with emotion, you know, unlike KStew).

  7. LOL yes who gives a damn about the black volvo, its a volvo, theres no such thing as a cool volvo, no matter the colour or size.
    I may even prefer the “soccer-mum-black-4-wheel-drive-volvo” as opposed to “shiny-silver-gay-coupe-volvo”.
    Rob just has to grab his Dad-case and he’ll be right with you kids…

    • Don’t forget the “Jitterbug” phone!

    • @vi: volvos aren’t cool, they’re safe—& as an immortal vampire who drives like a Cullen Robward errs on the side of safety—believe me, there’s method in this backassward madness—as a volvo driver i’ll reveal this on another day—LOL

  8. Well, not only did the volvo change color, it grew by 50%. And since Renesmee will not be showing up in Eclipse, I smell opportunities here.

    Ow, I truly missed the Cullens at the prom! I really would have loved to see some Alice and Jasper ballroom action. Especially when they gave us the Alice toe-points during the baseball scene. Anticlimax.

    • And what the hell was with Victoria being there???

      Wouldn’t she have not been able to control killing EVERYONE there?

      And wouldn’t have Edward KNOWN she was there?

      Duh, fail.

      • My love who hasn’t read the book ever but has watched the movie with me “several” times said “Wouldn’t your bf know the redhead was there?”

        HA!

        If the love notices it, you know it has to be obvious.

        • @nearly22 – My Husband said the same thing and it went like this ..” But wouldn’t ur other Babbydaddy know that the Chick was standing there? I Thought You couldnt sneak up on a vampire?” My response was ” Thanks hunny for reminding me that The Couger Bootlegged my Beloved Twilight…

    • I concur, sassy, and i wonder wht it looked like she had been crying? vampires can’t cry?

      And what irks me every time i see it is the cafeteria scene. As much as i adore it, it seems like Edward walks right by the table Bella & Co. are sitting at. Would he not have smelt her then? And then gone all crazy lunchtime vampire on her?

      • It shouldn’t “seem” like he walks by them, he actually does. They all do. But upon reading Midnight Sun you understand how “upwind” the Cullens sit. So we can assume that since his walk-by occurs on the same side of B&Co. that the Cullen table is on (while far away), he can’t smell her just yet. If that makes any sense…
        While on this scene, can we please take a moment to remember the beautiful line about how Bella thinks she can see him smile whenever Jessica says “Apparently no one is good enough for him.” ::dazzled::

  9. The SUV is wayyy better but that’s not the point, the point is why would they switch models? colours ok but these are two completely different cars. maybe their just trying to screw with us.

  10. Let’s be honest here, Kristen could put across the best acting performance ever seen in New Moon and everyone would still be hating on her.

  11. Didn’t realise the comment had to be moderated, guess that means mine won’t be approved.

  12. Shrimp fry… Forrest Gump goes Twilight!

    I confess to missing the silver Volvo. They aren’t really giving our sexy vamp that suburban mom-o-van are they?

  13. leg hitch in Eclipse is a MUST!!!!!!!!. Nice post again! mwaaaa fake lesbian kisses

    • If they don’t have that I’ll boycott. That’s a lie. If they don’t have the leg hitch I’ll be highly upset, but I love Stephenie Meyer and PG smut bad enough I’ll rewind it and play it a millondy seven times once it’s out on BluRay if they put it in there. Leg hitches are sexy.

      M

      • If they don’t include the leg hitch, we should stage protests that involve us hitching our legs over the hips of Robward look-a-likes* in front of theaters nationwide.

        *Even if they do include the leg hitch, I think we should still form a Robward look-a-like search committee. I’ll chair.

        • And still do the leg hitch I assume?

        • We could all just get the cardboard cutouts and cut his arm loose, hitch our legs up, and drape that free arm over. Ta-da! That way we wouldn’t have to actually touch a creeper and give him the satisfaction that he might possibly slightly resemble the man we all drool over.

          M

  14. *hand smacks forehead*

    I’m not going to lie, when I saw Twilight the first time, my friend and I groaned at some of the inconsistencies. Like the fact that no one mentioned Jasper’s ability (or that he and Rosalie were Hales). Or that they killed off Lauren Mallory and Ben Cheney (what that his last name?). Or Bella’s psychotic blinking. Or that Edward clearly had stubble for like half the movie. Or every single casting choice.

    But all of this served to turn the movie into a comedy/ogling session for me and not a motivation to storm message boards.

    And I guarantee you I’m going to continue to laugh my ass off during New Moon. Does this mean I have to turn in my Twi-Fan card?

  15. Also the timing doesn’t make sense, if Bella starts at Forks in March, prom is in May, but Edward’s been sneaking into her bedroom to watch her sleep for “a couple of months”. Bu… wha… how….

    I’m glad the makeup people got the memo to whiten & sparkle up Edward’s ears for NM and Eclipse. It was fucking distracting how red his ears were in Twilight. But still HOT.

  16. Also – I want to cast my daughter as Renesme. Hate the name. But she’s got the pale skin, the curls, she’s adorable (yes, I am biased) and smart. It could work, right? Then I get to meet Rob, he’s swept up with how great she is, decides that kids aren’t so bad, and we bring back polygamy as he becomes my 2nd husband. There’s potential…. 🙂

  17. “UC: Do they think we’re Vampire Diaries fans or something? Ugh”
    ok, i know this site is for twilight, but i’m so glad that question was uttered. my daughter got me started on vampire diaries and the one thing that is stressed in that book is the girl’s blond hair and blue eyes. why would the producers make her a brunette with brown eyes? how hard is it to find a blond in hollywood?

    • I watched last night. I haven’t ever heard of it…BUT…I wish THAT girl had been cast as Bella…she is closer to my mental image from the books.

      And Damon…holy hot house. I dig him.

      • I agree Sassy. She has a sweet look to her face, as opposed to a …..not so sweet (read bitchface) face.

      • Sass, I felt the same way. Even texted my best friend and said “I wish *this* girl had been cast as Bella.” lol

        And that Ian guy who plays Stefan, he’s totes Robward-lite. All of the mannerisms, 1/2 the hotness.

        I wasn’t digging Damon either. Something about him reminds me of the O’Connell boys.

        Oh wait, this is a Twi-site, isn’t it? lmao

        • Robward-lite! HAHAHAHA!!!!!

          • I totally agree, that guy was not doing it for me at all! He is too pretty, and kind of reminded me of Zack Morris. I loved Zack Morris back in the day and all, but he’s no Robward 🙂

      • OMG Sassy….I almost hurled (didn’t want to ruin “Blanket Rob”) watching that show!! I HAD forgotten about the horror and then YOU go and mention it here at the ALL THAT IS SACRED LTT…..good thing I heart you!!! That show was sooooo bad…..except that I remember…one really really hot guy…not like Robward, but nonetheless, he was eye worthy……now please… allow this swiss cheese brain of mine to forget what I saw last night and live happily ever after back in my world of Twi…

      • I watched too. i think they’re trying to parallel a lot of the things in Twilight. Maybe that’s why they made Elena a brunette?.

        The teacher’s name was Mr. Tanner-a nod toTtwilight??

        I thought Damon was hot too. poor Stefan-he’s no Edward.

        • No…a nod to Full House.

          • Sorry I’ve never seen Full House. Tanner,Banner. They want it to be as Twi-like as possible without getting sued.

          • How can you not have seen full house? How rude! =)

          • I’m putting it in my Netflix queue right now!

            This has nothing to do with anything but Full House reminded me of it. When I was at the Remember Me filming near Grand Central people kept asking who we were waiting for. This group of girls told everyone we were there to see Bob Saget. It was pretty funny seeing the looks on peoples’ faces at this crowd of women waiting to see..Bob Saget.

            And that is my Bob Saget story for today.

        • I’m still pissed that the Stefan dude has a “family ring”. Cullen Crest much? I know in the VD books, I know, I sunk low, that they had a ring, but not a FAMILY ring. Ugh, they are trying so hard.

      • I thought the same thing!!!!!

        Damon or Stefan, both HOT!! Fun Fact, Ian Somerhalder, who plays Damon, was linked to Ashley this Spring.

        • http://twitpic.com/hb6jl

          I love Ian Somerhalder since I forever, but he is not as hot as Rob!

          • And we also love him for this:

            What do you think about the Twilight comparisons?

            IS – I haven’t seen the movie because I don’t want to subconsciously compare them, but their success paved the way for our existence.

            Which has the hotter vampires?

            IS – Robert Pattinson is a handsome sucker!

            HAHA!! Yes, Ian, yes he is.

      • I totally agree! SHE would have been a great Bella.

        I was McLovin the Diaries last night. But I’m seriously easy to please and easily amused.

    • Hi person with my first name, except that people call me Jane Trigs now cause it’s funny!

    • It’s probably quite hard to find a blonde in Hollywoo with matching collar and cuffs!

  18. Its not about the book. It is about the movie. The script will change daily. Stars have written into their contracts if they don’t like a word or a scene or a story line they change it. http://bobbygee.wordpress.com/

  19. They should skip the Volvo altogether and go with the Vanquish. Now that is Edward we want: The Vanquish, Ray Bans, crooked smile. Please. That puppy doesn’t stand a chance.

  20. Having watched the movie AT LEAST once a day since the DVD came out….I feel comfortable saying that it is not all in the details, (I still don’t remember the details) its in the EMOTIONS!!! Or in Twilight’s case the LACK there of….there are way toooo many misses in that department…btw I am admit to being one of those “with WAY to much time on their hands” as I contributed the movie mistake about the missing Armadillo..there I said it and I am PROUD!!! So don’t mess with me today….not enough sleep or coffee…..I am just saying……

    • I have only seen the movie a whole two times and I usually catch EVERY mistake in one…but I missed the Armadillo.

      And I was drunk when I read the book so I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t know the inconsistancies.

      • LMAO…Oh to be drunk….and reading Twilight….I miss those days….hey sassy..you’ve been so great filling in the “blanks” for me (a full time job I might add) what is the “leg hitch”…I admit that I have had some fun thinking what it could be…. 🙂
        BTW where is Opedial??? I am worried about her??? Also while I am on a roll…literally….totally dizzy this a.m.. I was thinking that if your going to fly in to go to NM w/me , you should plan on spending a couple of days/weeks…to talk me through the movie details…

        • HAHA! Well, I don’t know where you are but I would be happy to come see it with you!

          “Leg Hitch” I can actually answer this…sort of…in Eclipse when Edward goes off hunting Alice has Bella over for a ‘slumber party’ (which is where the black and gold brocade bedding first comes into the story)…well, he comes back from hunting and they start to chastely make out and then Edward gets a little adventerous and basically hitches Bella’s leg up onto his hip. The first time he has sort of ‘given in’ to his need/desire.

          Is that about accurate girls?

          • *fans self* Yeah, that about sums it up Sassy.

          • UC, Moon, Sassy, Jodie, Oedipal and all my new Twi-friends….I have been reading and re- reading all the posts and I have decided not to comment anymore…..I can’t follow most of what is here because its having to do with the other books and I don’t want to be a pest always asking so many questions. I wouldn’t even say anything but EVERYONE here has been so nice/welcoming/patient, I didn’t just want to “disappear “without any explanation. I HEART YOU ALL SO MUCH..and I will be still here everyday reading and laughing right along with you!! I can’t wait for all of you to go see New Moon and then read EVERYTHING you have to say about it…..THANKS for letting me “be normal” for just awhile! xoxox

          • Cyndi…. we understand…. and LOVE you!!!!!! Keep in touch
            x

          • What the hell??? You’re leaving? I’m gonna go into a BellaStew style studdering fit.

            *pouts*

          • @sassysmart……Please don’t ruin your reputation with a repeat of Kstew studdering..especially on my behalf…I will never forget (o.k. its on a post-it) that I have right next to me that I wrote on the day UC & Moon posted my letter…you know what I wrote?? “How could a complete stranger offer to get on a plane for ME? ” I can never tell you how much that means to me or for that matter all the comments that people wrote. I guess I don’t want to ruin that. On days like today…when I just keep losing peices of myself, am so confused and can’t keep anything in my head, ….I don’t want people looking at my comments and saying “what the hell is she talking about?” Do you understand? I love it here, I felt some confidence coming back..but it doesn’t last and I know I its just a matter of time before I really screw up…..and what if I don’t even know I have and it is out there for all to see? It was so much fun while it lasted and I will miss it all more than you know….its time for me to accept the reality of the way things are and will remain. Promise you will give all the details of NM!! I HEART YOU BIG TIME!!! Don’t forget me ok??

        • Oedipal moved and I think the place she’s living in now doesn’t have good internet, so she’ll be scarce for a while. I heard from her just the other day. =)

          Also, MS, I left you a message in yesterday’s comments. I didn’t realize that you’d changed your name OR that you were a Yankee like me! Hope you had some extra blankets last night. BRR!

          • Thanks Sassy and Jodie..ohhh just the thought of the leg hitch …how I want to be able to read NM and Eclipse and BD!!!! I am missing out on soooo much!!!

            Yes Jodie…Oedipal helped me with the new name, she came up with Midnight Cyn (for Cyndi) and of course I didn’t “get it”..so I changed it to Sin…we both had a good chuckle…yes was freezing last night…even Blanket Rob wasn’t enough, if you can imagine that!!!

          • @MidSin – Maybe if we bat our eyelashes and ask real nice we can get real Rob to come keep you warm on these chilly nights.. Just make sure he doesn’t flick his cigarette ash all over you…

        • Drunk and reading Twilight, holla!! I recall several evenings of boozing that coincided with my first read of the series. After I got home, I’d wind down with the books until I fell asleep. Actually I was often fighting the sleep. Then in the wee hours of the morning, I’d be turning over and remember where I left off. Not even the hangovers of doom could keep me from bolting upright and continuing to read. Because I HAD TO KNOW what was next.

      • I may or may not have made up drinking games while reading twilight.

        1 shot for “incredulous”
        1 shot for “chagrin”
        2 shots for “irrevocably”

  21. OMG UC, the stuttering. Total win.

    But about the Volvo in the book. How the hell did they get all 5 Cullens in that thing? Emmett is HUGE, and Jasper and Edward aren’t no itty bitty things.

  22. Well put, I couldn’t care less about the colour of the volvo, or that Edward even drives a volvo, or what colour the kitchen cupboards are, as long as everytime I watch it he ‘just wants to try one thing’ I’m happy!

    • Oooohh yes. I must admit they totally spoiled us with the kiss! That was a major improvement compared to the Bella-recovering-from-almost-puking book kiss.

      btw, am I the only one who thinks initiating a kiss with the words “I wanted to try something” is not very romantic. I would have expected Edward to have picked a better moment and not to sound like he finally had the opportunity to conduct a little experiment.

  23. I am just not a passionate fan I guess. I don’t really notice the little things. I honestly don’t care THAT much. Just get the basic story right and don’t make me hate the acting…that’s all I ask…that’s all I want for my $10. Is that so much to ask?

  24. Although I hope they stick to the book for the important things, one thing I wish they’d change is Renesmee. Like cut her out altogether. Ditch the pregnancy/ lame Volturi confrontation altogether and write a completely different ending.Please, getting pregnant on your honeymoon. Uggh. At 18.Uggh. After having had sex for the first time with the man you’ve been lusting after for two years. Uggh.With a monster baby that rips you apart from the inside. Ugggh. For me, this is where it stopped being a love story and just became a mess.

    I wish they could make the movie of BD from one of the really good fanfiction versions of it. To me they’re so much better.

    • I love you.

      For me, it could only work if they completely rewrite it, or if they get Tarantino to direct it.

      • Love you back. I know not everyone feels this way about BD, but for me it was such a disappointment, especially after loving the other books so much. I’m only looking forward to the honeymoon scene.

        Tarantino-now that could work!

        • Yea, we’re definitely in the minority. Everything went down the drain after the first morning sickness. I felt like someone had slapped me.

    • Yes, Pleeeze,

      LYLS- the last chapter makes me cry everytime!

      I’ve almost read it as many times as BD.

    • You’re not alone…….The first three books I couldn’t wait to get on to the next book. I was left with wanting more. When I got to the end of BD, I wanted to throw it across the room. Bella was supposed to make sacrifices when she became a vampire – no children, no more of her family, lose Jacob forever, experience an inability to control her newborn thirst – but she got it all handed to her on a platter.

      The big focus on the so-called face down with the Volturi consumed the latter part of the book, and that amounted to nothing in the end. There was little focus on the Bella/Edward love story after she turned, because the Volturi drama consumed it.

      Several months later I’m still mad lol.

      • What Edward/Bella love story? You mean the 3 books of angsty whining and pining over something that’s apparently unavoidable? (okay, that’s mostly just eclipse)

        I thought the most loving scene of their whole relationship was in BD when they make her eat human food and ask what she’s hungry for. “Eggs” and then she and Edward share a smile. That’s love.

  25. This post is all one big Twi-Dork Confession.

    I was just disappointed that Edward wasn’t wearing an off-white TURTLENECK sweater and light TAN leather jacket at the restaurant. Hm. Yeah.

    • I’m with you on the clothing in the restaurant scene, but I will let all inconsistencies and gripes w/the movie go because they had the sense not to put him in a sleeveless button down shirt. Thank God.

      And yes, UC & Moon win the dork of the day award. Yay!

      • I agree! I don’t care what he was wearing in the restaurant as long as he didn’t have that sleeveless button down shirt anywhere in the movie. Was Steph drunk when she wrote that?
        I bet that was another thing Rob said no to the Cougar Cathy.
        She probably thought that would be so COOL.

      • I wish I could take credit for coming up with all those inconsistencies & mistakes, but I have to give credit to where it’s due- to the people who have WAY too much time on their hands in the sources I listed below…. THEY get infinite Twi dork of the day awards

        • Ok UC..did you just like insult me??? Is Twi dork award a good or bad thing….???? Do you know how many times I had watched Twilight before I noticed the missing Armadillo??Then I had to make a note of it…why? Cause its what I do…lol…I watch a bit…grab a post it..make a note…read some of the book..make another note..and so on…Imagine my confusion the next day when I read pink post it saying “Armadillo missing” didn’t have a clue…and the process starts all over… IT WAS ALOT OF WORK…

    • LOL! I agree! I dissected the movie so much!

  26. ladies – also note the volvo picture above is not only charcoal, but its the volvo SUV, not the coupe. WTF?

  27. hey! ok, i hadn’t really noticed the white cupboards until i read it here, but really.. why would they change something so basic? It happens all the time in the movie (like their clothes) they changing something in the scene or a whole scene that really touched you in the book, and wouldn’t even occupy that much more time.. really.. i just watch the movie.. because we don’t have the books to long for.. lolol

  28. Keeping it short and sweet today: I love you guys. A lot. That made me laugh (a tonnnn) on a day when it was most needed ❤

    P.S. (so much for short and sweet) people really freaked about the cabinet colors in Twilight?! I wouldn't be able to tell you the color of the cabinets if my life depended on it…

  29. Bwahaha to Twi-Dork Confession!

  30. oh and.. i’m a little scared about how they will do the part when Bella is “playing” with her shield in the near fight in BD. What do you think?

  31. Dear U.C.
    I thought I was dreaming…actually I no longer dream…true story….but if I did..I would have sworn you where there when I was trying to explain to the hubs what the hell I am doing on the computer all the time for the last couple of weeks….how else would you have heard me say, “Are yo- NO! NO! How, I don’t even know what you’re say- How Ho- Whadya whayda you talking about, yo- want me to go away- I, I, I can’t, I can’t I I can’t just leave – I just don’t even know what to say….

  32. ” I have nothing in my cupboards”
    Moon — Does it matter what is IN your cupboards? I thought it only mattered what color they were.

    The first day of school thing did bother me a bit, but all the other stuff? I didn’t even notice. What’s to notice when Rob’s on the scene?

  33. Rosalie drives a red BMW convertible in the book. in the movie its a mercedes!

    Do they think we wouldnt notice just cause we are girls!

    • HAHAh i SOOO noticed it was a mercedes! come on!

      • THANK YOU!!!! I am so glad to know that more people (girls) noticed that!

        and I am sure Emmet’s jeep is not supposed to be that UGLY!!!!

        • What I don’t get is why Emmett wasn’t driving his own Jeep?! What was up with Jasper doing the driving when they went to school in separate vehicles?!

          • Totally Agreed!

            I think they were just trying to save money by not getting another car for Jasper.

            If it gets to Breaking Dawn and Edwards Aston Martin V12 Vantage is changed to some old james bond aston martin, I will be SO TICKED OFF!!!!! Or worse, if it ends up being a Ford or something…

            Deep breath, and relax

    • It’s not just a mercedes, it’s a downgrade in car awesomeness! She drives an M3 in the book! You can’t even begin to compare a CLK 350 to that car…the mercedes would simply die of shame.

  34. I just love how this has turned into the Cougar Cathy and Old Navy beat down week. So brilliant! I am with you UC as long and the leg hitch and the hot forest kiss aren’t effed up I am so ok. If Mr. Slade get’s those right Edward can drive a Pinto for all I care……well, maybe not, but you know what I mean!

    Happy Friday!!!!

  35. OMG, you guys just cheer up my rainy morning! I laughed so hard at this article. The truth i, these things are important!

    The things that I want to definately be in there are:
    -The soul discussion b/w Bella and Carlisle as it is a major wall as to why Edward will not change her.
    -The line when E/B are reunited…”Carlisle was right.” See above ref for it’s importance.
    -The proposal. I heard the compromise was altered. Hello, this is a MUST scene.

    Ok, I think that is all. We have already seen the hot reunion which I wanted to see come to life.

    Is it November yet?

    Cartnee

  36. Oh, thank you for bringing the funny this dreary Friday morning – srsly, I’m lauging at my desk over the ‘How Ho- Whadya whayda you talking about, yo- want me to go away- I, I, I can’t, I can’t I I can’t just leave – I just don’t even know what to say…. ‘ SO painful to watch!

    I WAS thinking that maybe the date change for Bella’s first day of school was due to the dances. In the book, there was the girls’ choice dance and then prom. For the movie, I assumed they moved the date up because they were skipping right to prom, which is usually toward the end of the school year.

    Really, shouldn’t there be a panel of Twifans (I mean the cool, realistic, sanity-possessing fans like Moon & UC) who are consulted about these things? And paid for their services? Paid with a currency we can appreciate, like minutes alone in a closet with Robert Pattinson?

    • SERIOUSLY!!!!!!!!! sign us up, we’ll be legit about the saga and make sure everything’s all hunky dory. pay us in rob minutes!! please

  37. I love you all. that’s all

    Also.. it’s Forks-like weather again in PA….. sigh..I need to get myself a vampire…

  38. yeahh the armadillo thing…
    well and i wouldn´t be mad if the ´recast´ melissa…
    in twilight the movie i hate that edward and bella can´t stand a normal conversation… it´s just like… random lines and stuff.

  39. I notice inconsistencies, but they don’t bother me unless it’s something I deem “important” to the story. The first day of school thing bothered me, but only because to me it was part of a bigger problem I had with the movie – the shoving of several months contact between Bella and Edward into what seemed like just days in the movie.

  40. Meh. I’m with you, I can barely muster up a care, I’ve got bigger fish to fry with Harry Clearwater today. Just sayin.

    However, you would not have had to read the books very much or even completely to know that the Volvo was silver. It may have been mentioned about 111 times….

    But, I am also with you , I need to cry my way thru NM, there has to be the best leg-hitch in history in Eclipse, and Isle Esme had better be gorgeous….

  41. The only thing that really bothered me in the movie was the disappearance of the Bella’s backpack (before the “say it out loud” scene) and her blue eyeshadow (biology classroom scene no.1)
    Really ,Cougar Cathy, were YOU drunk that day. No one is wearing sky blue eyeshadow anymore (since the 60’s) and Bella is not wearing make up at all. It didn’t make her prettier either. It was just there, bothering me.

  42. I love how none of us want to make out with Edward in a hatchback or station wagon (ew), but we’d all like to blow Rob behind a Dumpster.

  43. As for the Volvo, there are way more issues here than just the color.
    The book has him driving an S60R, which is actually a very sporty and fairly fast (even before modifications) sedan. It would seat 5 comfortably.
    The movie has him driving an S30, basically a Mini Cooper. I agree, the entire clan could NOT fit in there.
    What is shown above is the XC90, which is an SUV, besides being charcoal colored, WAY off from the original car.

    My real life BF is a car freak, it rubs off.
    I keep hoping the one pictured is one they’re using to shuttle people to and fro on set…

    • go, Velo, tell it like it is—<3

    • I say the hale with the car at all….for me its the cool way Edward tells Bella to get in the car and how he just “looks” the shit out of those 4 a-holes….ohhh to have a guy like that…I’d take him in the ole red truck…dent and all…picture it…in the back, under the stars….ok…really need to get a life and a cold shower……

    • @Velo: C30, not S30 (see my comment waaaay above).

      ps-Volvo’s site describes the C30 as “the fuel efficient and compact Volvo.” Does anyone think that this fits Edward’s personality? (or make out ability…how can he effectively use the old “We must have run out of gas” line if it’s a fuel efficient car?)

  44. I can overlook a lot of differences between movies and books……they happen for whatever reason. But I will not overlook a leg hitch when Rob…I mean Edward is involved, it’s just not going to happen.

    Forks weather here as well and still no vampire in sight……..sigh…..

  45. Wait, I’m confused. On Popsugar they showed a video with a SILVER Volvo. I couldn’t care less what color the volvo is as long as it’s not blue in one scene and then silver in another…and come on – with the continuity problems in Twilight, that’s entirely possible 😉 Well, with Catherine it’s possible. I have more faith in david slade…..

    Here’s the vid. I know it’s popsugar and all – but that IS a silver Volvo in the clip, no?
    http://www.popsugar.tv/4848537

  46. OMG- I never even realized or thought about the fact none of the other Cullens are at the prom till you just said it!!

    I just started rereading Twilight last night and it’ll only be the second time I’ve read it since I first did in March before I saw the movie, and I noticing a the discrepancies, like the aforementioned yellow cabinets.

  47. I am more disgruntled that it is a still a hatch-back.

    sicknast.

  48. Forks like weather here near Washington, DC. Thanks for making me laugh today. I will only require some chocolate to make it through te day.

    PS I AM PISSED ABOUT….I never get pissed about much of anything so yeah, that’s all.

  49. this was hilarious, i noticed all those things in the movie too plus more. i can’t help but feel so loyal to the books because i love them so much and i have to constantly remind myself they change stuff in movies for artistic purposes, flow of storyline, marketability, and stuff like that. not gonna lie though, (for all you harry potter fans) i am still shocked that they randomly threw in the weasly house burning down with bellatrix/fenrir. i mean WTF that wasn’t in the book at all, and its not like it was something small like having the cullens cook for bella, it was MAJOR. ugh.

  50. ‘In the book, Bella’s first day at Forks High School is on January 19. In the film, her first day is in March. This is a MAJOR issue. MAJOR problems could happen because of the different dates. I can’t think of any right now, but I know it’s a MAJOR big deal”

    I actually do think this is a big deal because E&B have the TIME to go from secret-love-at-first-site to falling in love realistically… whereas the movie turned their tale into the Readers Digest version…

    • I’m a total dork here…but, honestly what drove me the craziest was all the special moments between Bella and Edward not in the movie. I understand it’s a two hour movie, but could we not get some of them??? All the conversations to and from school, Edward spending the night, the lullaby – doesn’t mean as much when it’s just played on the piano in the movie (it’s like “oh, Edward can play the piano, cool”) and the meadow scene. Darn you, C. Hardwicke! Maybe it was just me, but I just about died when Edward places his ear to her chest to listen to her heartbeat. It was such an intimate moment. And, as mentioned in earlier comments this week, all we get from the meadow is them just laying there, looking like their legs have been shot through a blender. It was just terrible. If I don’t get special B&E moments in New Moon and future movies, I’m leading the pitch forking protests and riots up to the gates of Summit.

      • Exactly! I’m 97.5% positive that Non-readers did not truly ‘get’ E&B from the movie unless they read the book later and then get all high and mighty…haha

        I love the movie in the since that I droll at the sight of many things while watching but I could only do that if I separated myself from the book.

        UC, I love the sarcasm in the post today but (*using very mild sarcasm here*) you tore open a wound in my heart that I thought had healed into a slight sliver crescent….heh.

      • i totally agree! its like they talked a couple times, she declares he’s a vampire, she interrogates him about his vamp lifestyle, and boom they are in love complete soulmates. thank god i read the books b/c if i hadn’t i would have been saying wtf the entire time. i hope that the slightly shiteous twilight movie was due to lack of funding and hopefully new moon is a million times better due to the fact they banked it off of twilight.

        • The timeline in the movie and me thinking, “WTF” is what led me to read the books. Too much didn’t make sense to me, and I had to find out what I was missing!

      • I actually found the lullaby pretty underwhelming in the movie. Sure, it’s kinda nice, but I really couldn’t imagine Edward humming Bella to sleep with it.

      • Was it just me (I’ve only seen it ten times) or did neither E or B say “I love you” in the movie? Don’t they say it in the book? Or at least she says it or something?

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