Taylor and a cougar… and other random stuff…

Hi. It’s me. I am sick. I thought I could pretend like I’m not and just go on my merry-old way, but it turns out it’s pneumonia and I’m supposed to “rest.” Whatever. So today is a random hoj-poj of stuff I want to post or talk about. Enjoy! And stay away from me, unless you want time to “rest” too.

Dear Taylor,

I was just perusing the interwebs looking for news and I happened upon this article in News in Film about you that I have NO idea if it’s true or not, but it gave me a big chuckle.

When Taylor Lautner ripped off his shirt countless times in The Twilight Saga: New Moon, women of all ages swooned for the new found muscled figure he had cultivated between movies.  Nothing was more creepy, however, than Lautner’s recount on “The Jay Leno Show” about the time a 40-ish woman, accompanied by an embarrassed daughter, told the 17-year-old actor she wanted him to autograph her panties.Which is why the new possible starring vehicle for Lautner hits close to home.  According to E! Online, the sought-after teen phenom may be up for the lead in a remake of Vision Quest, a cheeseball 1985 movie about a high school wrestler who falls for an older woman.  Matthew Modine starred in the original alongside the feature debuts of Linda Fiorentino and Madonna.

Twilight producers Wyck Godfrey and Marty Bowen are developing the onesie to fit Lautner, as well as a Taken-style action movie set in Cancun for him to bust out more stunts and ab shots.  He’s also signed to play Max Steel in an adaptation of the Mattel action figure line.

My favorite part of this story, though, is that Empire mixed up Taylor Swift and Taylor Hicks, calling the latter and American Idol winner Lautner’s “current squeeze.”  I guess I’m not the only one who mixes up the Taylors on occasion.  Just last week I called him Johnathan Taylor Thomas.  What ever happened to that guy, any way?

Okay SO many LOLs- the jab about busting out more stunts and ab shots in the Max Steel movie, and the mention of my main squeeze from ’91-’99, JTT! But the biggest of them all?

may be up for the lead in a remake of Vision Quest, a cheeseball 1985 movie about a high school wrestler who falls for an older woman.

Seriously? If this is true that role was MADE for you! Young guy falling for an older woman? Hey- I bet Chris Hansen would even be willing to do a little cameo!

Can’t wait to see you and some cougar getting it on,
UnintendedChoice

Follow the jump for more randomness!

Happy Labor Day from the hot Twilight cast

Dear LTTers in countries other than the US,

Today is Labor Day in the United States. That means instead of working we’ll be stuffing ourselves with hot dogs and throwing up on volleyball courts. (Yes, just like Memorial Day and July 4th– we’re not very creative). For LTT and Moon & I, this means we let other people do the work for us (you may have noticed a trend all weekend long…… we started the celebration early!)

Again, the gals in Rob’s Flat daily chat in The Forum have given us the goods with a whole other slew of Twi-cast Porn:

Daaaanngggg ladies!

Happy Labor Day from your lazy friends UC & Moon! We’ll be back in full force tomorrow! Promise!

Love,
UnintendedChoice

Talk about your volleyball score on The Forum
See who did our work for us over on LTR

Twilight has the hottest cast

Dear very understanding LTTers,

You know when you have one of those nights as a vampire blogger when you know you’re going to have a late night dinner with friends, so you prepare ahead and draft up a quick idea of a great “Twilosophy” for the next morning, send a quick e-mail off to a group of vampire experts to consult for ideas & funny one-liners for the post you’ll work on when you come back from the late night dinner, no matter what time of night it is? Have you been there? Did you also forget to consider the amount of wine you’d consume at said late night dinner?

What does one do in this case when you get home after consuming 7 bottles of wine between 6 friends in 3 hours and the draft you so wonderfully started writing before you left for the dinner apparently isn’t as great as you’d hoped and only contains 3 run-on sentences and a rant about Rob Pattinson needing to come out of hiding?

Panic. That’s what you do.

Until you remember that you saved a very special post for the very special day when you would make a very special move and dance in the kitchen of your friend’s home to Lady Gaga while singing into an empty bottle of wine while being swung around by your friend Ryan who is declaring, not so subtly, “UC- can you see the Unicorns? [he means real unicorns] Do you want to ride a unicorn!? Rob Pattison has the head of a unicorn. Look- it’s Rob Pattison with a unicorn head. And he is biting pillows.” [True story. All of it.] To all of you girls in the Rob’s Flat Chat over on The Forum, you saved my ass with your amazing Twi-Cast Porn.

Twilight has the hottest cast, and you girls made them so much hotter!

Enjoy these while I enjoy my hangover,
UnintendedChoice

Many More after the jump!

Ready, set Bake-off!

Dear LTT darlings & unicorns,

On Friday we wrote a letter about the fake-sorority we’re starting. We had you suggest names for this sorta, kinda sorority, and DIED of laughter at the hilarious things you came up with.  We narrowed down our favs & want you to help us decide in a poll:

Thanks to ’86 rabbit, Jena, MegO and Proselyte3 for your suggestions! We both have a favorite, but we won’t say unless our choices win!

Oh, but there’s MORE. Much more. Another sorority THREATENED us! GASP. Check it after the cut