Eclipse Soundtrack Tracklisting! Insert excitement here! Every hour on the hour (ish)

Dear Eclipse Soundtrack Folks-

Um, by now I’m sure you know our crazy love for the soundtracks and breaking them down like a nutjob to the infinite degree, so of course you know we’re waiting with bated breath for you to release the hounds the tracklisting today. BUT being good followers of Stephenie Meyer you’ve mastered the art of the cock block and want to guarantee repeat visits, you have decided to release ONE TRACK an hour starting at 8AM Pacific Time (holla WEST COAST!) today on MYSPACE. Now, MYSPACE?! That’s another letter for a whole other day (or year), but COME ON!!! So now this is how it’s going to work, I’m going to be updating this letter through out the day to include all the latest announcements and artists on the sound track and hopefully give you some samples and scene ideas I think they might use the song in…

Until then let’s start with what we know and then some guesses…

Lead single…

Muse: Neutron Star Collision (Love is Forever) – Besides having the best name ever and being SMeyer’s ladyboner band, I’m secretly hoping they use that picture of the Edward Cullen Neutron of the Shire as the single cover. Here’s a total cockblock of a sample of Neutron Star Collision (Love is Forever) (say that ten times fast! you will be tested June 30).

Why yes, what a lovely piano tinkling sound.
*updated: supposed leak of the song HERE doesn’t sound like the same key, but I’ll let you decide*

Some other Muse tunes to hold you over since we know what they sound like… Starlight, Knights of Cydonia

Jesse & Joy: Magic & Desire – This was reported by Eclipse Movie (and some others but we love our bb Eclipse Movie) that Jesse and Joy, a latin band would be contributing a song to the soundtrack. This makes me wonder two things… where is this going to end up in the soundtrack? Maybe a Jasper/Maria scene? Or is this song only on Soundtracks in Latin America, since we learned that certain tracks only make it onto soundtracks in specific world areas. We shall see!

Jesse & Joy – Mi Sol
Love the totally emo graphics the video maker used. ANARCHY!!!!

This is quite beautiful and now I’m even more convinced whatever “Magic & Desire” is it will be included on a Latin America only version of the soundtrack. If Jessie & Joy had been more Rodrigo y Gabriella flavored I might be more inclined to think it could be for a certain scene but now I’m not so sure. Unless they do an english language song (like ‘And then there was you’ below) Dang, listen to these guys! They’re great!

Other Jesse & Joy: Adios, And Then There Was You

*UPDATED*

1. Metric – “Eclipse (All Yours)”
UC will be jumping for joy with the news that Metric will be on the Soundtrack. Her fake lesbian lover is Emily Haines.

Metric can kinda go either way with the up beat stuff or the more ballad-y songs… should be interesting and good call on just being obvious and titling the song Eclipse. Lest we forget what movie this is for…
Other Metric: Help I’m Alive, Twilight Galaxy (heh, someones a fan!)

2. Muse: Neutron Star Collision (Love is Forever)
OMG! didn’t see this one coming…see above…

3. The Bravery – “Ours”
The Bravery are super upbeat and rocky, this is a fun inclusion though they’re not rock in the traditional sense this could be something at the graduation party or maybe a cool chase or driving scene

Love this title!
More from The Bravery: Unconditional, Believe

4. Florence and the Machine – Heavy In Your Arms
So quality. I just saw Florence on Live at Abbey Road sessions the other day and can’t wait to hear “Heavy In Your Arms” she can really howl… speaking of…

Howl from Florence and the Machine

She such a strong female it almost makes me want to think about someone like Leah or maybe when Bella grows a pair…

More FATM: You’ve Got The Love, Hurricane Drunk

5. Sia – My Love
Now we all know everyone’s love affair with her song “Breathe Me” which was probably the best ever synch on 6 Feet Under a few years back but call me crazy I want to see some whacky Sia… or like Zero 7 Sia!

More Sia: Gimme More (cover of Britney) Destiny (zero 7)

6. Fanfarlo – Atlas
If I wasn’t freaking before I defs am now! Welcome to one of my favorite bands! UGH! Amazing. I usually don’t fan girl out over Twilight (says the girl who writes a blog about Twilight), but we’re talking the MUSIC, and it’s GOOD music!

UPDATED:

Atlas performed live earlier this year. (Thanks Lula!)

My fave Fanfarlo song The Walls Are Coming Down

More Fanfarlo: In The Aeroplane Over The Sea (cover of another of my faves: Neutral Milk Hotel)

7. The Black Keys – “Chop And Change”
Oh the Black Keys you are great…

(For Carter)

8. The Dead Weather – “Rolling in on a Burning Tire”
Dayum finally some (probably) hard ass music. Jack White kills in yet another side project band. We all know from David Slade’s tweets he had a director boner for them while filming in Vancouver, so good on him for making it happen. And besides anyone who names an album “Whorehound” is good peoples.

Alison Mosshart is a badass bitch throw her in with Jack and some others from Queens of the Stone Age and the Rancetouers and this is a SUPER group!

More from The Dead Weather: Treat Me Like Your Mother, I Cut Like A Buffalo

9. Beck and Bat For Lashes – “Let’s Get Lost”
UMMMM as we saw from  the Bon Iver / St. Vincent track from New Moon this collaboration could be redonkulous. Though I haven’t been a huge Beck fan for the last album or so I LOVE his album Sea Changes and couple that with my lady lover Natasha Khan (aka Bat for Lashes) and we have the makings of something that could be awesome!

Natasha will creep you out in the best way possible with What’s A Girl To Do?

More Bat for Lashes: Her cover of Use Somebody (one of my faves)

Beck

The Golden Age

More Beck: Girl, Sex Laws

10. Vampire Weekend – “Jonathan Low”
If UC would be peeing her pants over Metric, I will be peeing my pants over Vampire Weekend. Heck yea Ezra is my lover! I’ve kinda always hoped they’d end up on a Twilight soundtrack but knew it might be a slim chance because of the kitsch factor with the name but HALLELUJAH we have some Vampire Weekend!

Now VW can go both ways (TWSS) and I love them for it. They have a very, (I’m reluctant to use the word) ‘world’ ish vibe to their music that is very danceable  but then they can lay on the sweet jams. Because I love them so I’m giving you some extras here!

Giving up the gun

Probs my fave VW song ever… California English Pt 2

More Vampire Weekend: Cousins, Kids Don’t Stand a Chance, Walcott,  Cape Cod Kwassa Kwassa I told you I liked them. Now don’t go stealing my bf Ezra!

11. UNKLE – “With You In My Head (featuring The Black Angels)”
Brit band of greatness…

Be There

12. Eastern Conference Champs – “A Million Miles An Hour”
Hey, Philly folks here’s a band from your neck of the woods and one I don’t know much about so let’s take a listen…

The Box

More ECC: Sideways Walking

13. Band of Horses – “Life on Earth”
Who wants the sads? These boys bring them with their music. Need a fix before June 8th, their new album comes out next Tuesday!

The Funeral
One of my fave songs from back in the day, used to listen to this when I drove to work.

More BOH: No One’s Gonna Love You

14. Cee-Lo Green – “What Part Of Forever”
WWWHHHAAATTT>>!! CEE-LO GREEN?! Shit just got REAL interesting! For those not in the know, Cee-Lo is the other half of Gnarls Barkley and original member of Goodie Mob and boy can he SANG. Not just sing, SANG. Shall this be some sorta romantic soul moment? Engagement anyone? ORRR ORRR maybe the big kiss off between Bella and Jacob?! God that would be gut wrenchingly awesome!

Who’s gonna save my soul (Gnarls Barkley)

Cee-Lo is soul through and through but it’s soul that’s taken a ride on a space ship.

More Cee-Lo: Under the Influence, I’ll be Around, Going On (Gnarls Barkley). Spend the Night In Your Mind

15. Howard Shore – “Jacob’s Theme”
Dude, this is the guy who wrote the Lord of the Rungs score, I think we’re gonna be in good hands!

The Shire

I REALLY loved Alexandre Desplat’s Jacob’s Theme so I’m interested to see if Howard keeps any of the same tone or theme or does a whole new theme… we do get a different Jacob in Eclipse after all

Who will NOT make the cut…
100 Monkeys – They couldn’t write a song that wasn’t improvised, so every song they tried to record was different and NO ONE wanted to hear a song about a wolf threesome, Mrs. Cope’s menopause or what’s for lunch in the Forks High School Cafeteria. For serious.

Anyone from the Brit Pack, Sage, Mitch Hanson whoever, etc etc – For obvious reasons, do we even need to go into this?

Robert Pattinson – because he’s a big pansy and can’t put on his big boy Marks & Spencer underwear and give us a flippin’ song! UGH.

I’ve got my fingers and toes and legs and whatever else I can cross, crossed that this soundtrack will be as freaking awesome as the New Moon Soundtrack was. That soundtrack blew ours and every other music lover/snobs socks off and now that Alex Patsavas and the Twilight crew can demand original content from HUGE, awesome, credible artists I really can’t contain myself to see what kind of coup her and her team pulls off for Eclipse.

IS IT JUNE 8TH YET?!
Themoonisdown

Yes, I will be updating this as we find out the artists on the soundtrack and giving you the 411 and some tracks to listen to! Get excited! I am!!!!!! I live for this stuff! Any favorites or speculation you want to throw out there? What artists do you think are perfect for Eclipse?

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTR, The Forum, Twitter

News Dump: All the Twilight News fit to print, Monkey smell, Bree’s back and bitchface

Turn off your smell-o-vision

Dear LTT-ers,

It’s time again… tons of tid bits of interesting info but not enough time to write letters about it all. That means it’s time for a news dump. We’ll let you know what we think about the news and you decide from there if you care that much about 100 Monkeys or how Tyler Houseman’s promo shoot turned out.

• If these pictures had a scratch-n-sniff function this post about Jackson and 100 Monkeys playing at Bamboozle would smell like BO, ear hair, vomit, a melted Slurpee, an ash tray full of wet cigarettes, a used sweat towel from Jr High gym class, and melted Depp hair gel. Yup, EXACTLY what it would smell like.

• Bill Condon is announced as the director for Breaking Dawn. No word on whether it will be one or two movies or 3D or not lame but he writes fans a letter and does get a few things right, he addresses us all as twihards, Twilight fans and Twilight Moms. *RECORD SCRATCH* ummm… BILL? We’re gonna need to talk about this later

• David Slade got into the #goo stuff Monday night and tweeted till he got the munchies and left. IN THE FUTURE disable all communication devices before lighting up. Just ask La Stew.

Wait, she wrote a book about ME?!!

• You know that girl baby vamp that no one really care about, but is apparently a big enough deal that Stephenie decided to write a whole book about just her, while Midnight Sun remains unfinished? Yea there’s a new picture of her as Bree.

• Probably one of the causes of Slade’s online hissy fit, Lainey Gossip posted lots and lots of gossip and speculation about what REALLY went on behind the scenes of the Eclipse reshoots or as officials are calling them “pick ups.” Personally, I’d like to think the cause of all the hub-bub is actually because of the helicopters Punk’d Images hired to get these grainy ass photos of Bella and Jacob out on a dock somewhere… speaking of wasn’t I just talking about Vancouver and docks?

• The New York City paparazzi show us that they’re big fans off LTT by yelling the most amazing comment ever at Kristen while on the Met Gala red carpet… witness and then crazy Krisbians you can yell at me in the comments

We’ll leave it up to you to decide whether that’s a curtain or a table cloth around the bottom of her dress

Biiiiiitch please, I gotta tattoo

• Promo shots for Eclipse are starting to circulate around the nets of The Cullens, The Holy Trinity and The Wolfpack. For what it’s worthy Leah has the best bitchface and rack hands down.

• NOKIA Theater was announced as the place for the Eclipse premiere, and then it wasn’t and then everyone was confused. And then it was back at Grauman’s Chinese Theater like it was supposed to be all along.

• Robert Pattinson still loves to choke a bitch out. And wear incredibly tight, ball hugging, high waisted pants. We love it. We don’t.

Yup, that’s the news… I’m still thinking about Bree and being called a Twi-hard by Bill Condon…

IN THE FUTURE the news will be beamed to our brains. THE FUTURE IS NOW!
Themoonisdown

So what do you think about Leah’s bitchface? Amazing, right? And her hot ass tatt. Has anyone gone to a recent 100 Monkeys concert? Did I get the smell right? It’s been quite a while for me.

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTR, The Forum, Twitter

WAIT, Catherine Hardwicke could direct reshoots for Eclipse??

Coming to a TGIFridays this June!

Dear Eclipse,

I’m worried about you. Like, A LOT! First off it’s no secret you are my favorite. Sorry Twilight, New Moon, Midnight Sun (psst you’re 2nd!) and Breaking Dawn, but Eclipse just does it better. So I’ve got even more invested in this one than I usually do. But now there’s news (via Lainey) that there might be reshoots taking place in Vancouver in the next few weeks (quick to the Twi-mobile!) which isn’t totally disconcerting (ok, just a bit) since a lot of movies have to do this but the BIG gossip is that someone other than David Slade might direct these reshoots and that someone just might be CATHERINE HARDWICKE!!! (click that!)

Yes, the Cathy Hardi that gave us famous lines such as “Hold on tight, you little spider monkey.” Ugh, I retch just thinking about it. Yes, the Cathy Hardi that gave us the infamous slow motion ghetto Vampire run that made every person in the history of ever laugh out loud. Yes, the Cathy Hardi that gave us Edward’s sweaty-sparkling-pock-marked face. Yes, the Cathy Hardi that had milked the supposed “Rob and Kristen Twilight Audition Tape” for all it’s worth, which in reality is probably just her and Solomon Trimble running lines on your couch in Venice Beach.

A still from the "audition tape"

So forget the whole, “what about the directors vision?” “what about being true to the spirit of the story?” I’m downright scared half these reshoots are going to take place in a TGIFridays with the crew getting paid in all they can drink mucho margaritas and potato skins. Will the tent scene actually take place in the handicapped stall of the women’s bathroom while Edward and Bella get their leghitch on in the vinyl booth for a party of 10?

You see Eclipse, these are the things that will keep my up at night until it’s announced/leaked/rumored who really puts the finishing touches on you. Speaking of that it’s almost May and you come out in JUNE and they’re reshooting now?! HOLD ME, Eclipse, HOLD ME!!!!!!!!!!

In my happy place,
Themoonisdown

PS I need one of those cougarita’s right about now
PPS Time to start fasting and praying in earnest people. Earnest!

Seriously? Reshoots? WHY? Catherine? David? Chris? Moon and UC who should direct this stuff and who else needs me to pour them a cougarita?

Our internet game is still ridiculous: The Forum, LTR, Twitter

Will Bill Condon direct Breaking Dawn, The Musical? I sure hope so!

If you only knew...

Dear Bill Condon,

Oh Bill Condon… oh Bill, Bill, Bill… if you only knew what you were getting yourself into… alas that is a letter for another day. We have more pressing matters to discuss today…

Of all the rumored directors being vetted for Breaking Dawn: Gus van Sant, Sofia Coppola, Fernando Meirelles and a few others your name seems to just keep coming up. Especially yesterday when we learned that you may be in talks/negotiations to direct BD. And I gotta say I’m super excited! For the general public they probably best know you from your film adaptations of the musicals Chicago and Dreamgirls*. As a HUGE nerd fan of musicals this has my head spinning. Because I’m sure, like me, there are tons of people out there thinking Breaking Dawn will be turned into a musical. A musical version of Breaking Dawn? YES PLEASE!!! Just imagine it…

We open with a wide shot of Forks with an incoming rain storm in the background. Charlie slowly drives the streets in his cop car singing a  “Patrolling in the Rain” type of song under his breath. Then the skies open up and it begins raining. Raining glitter, of course.

glitter, lots and lots of glitter!

Then we catch up with Bella singing about that dumb ol car as she gases up the Mercedes Guardian at the gas station and then uses the gas pump as a prop jump rope and sings “Only a Human, not yet a Vampire” as a man taps dances around the car inspecting it.

Later on we have the wedding scene which I imagine as a sort of Guys and Dolls Nathan and Adelaide getting married scene only set in the Cullens backyard while we cut to shots of Jacob running through the forest singing “Get me to the church Cullens on time.”

Then to celebrate their marriage we have a huge ensemble number, a re-imaging of “We’ve only just begun” with the Cullen family, Wolfpacks, humans, townspeople raising closed umbrella’s for them to walk through and then as they leave for the honeymoon, instead of throwing birdseed or rose petals the guests throw, what else? Glitter!

In honor of Stephenie Meyer’s ultimate cockblock, for the honeymoon  scene instead of fading to black the musical version of Breaking Dawn will have something very similar to “Contact” by Angel in Rent, where we don’t actually really see anything go down but we know it’s a big metaphor for sex. Yup, Stephenie you will still have your fade to black in the end.

Yup, twihards made this Bill. GET READY

Bella giving birth closes the first act . I imagine this like the scene (I think, theater nerds help me out) in Carousel when Billy is stabbed and instead of it being literally blood spurting, instead a red sheet slowly gets pulled out to symbolize her bleeding to death as Edward holds up Reneesme all Rafiki-holds-Simba-up-in-Lion-King like and then hands her to Rosalie as he launches into a gut wrenching soliloquy about possibly losing Bella all while Jacob cowers in the corner singing to himself quietly.

End of Act 1

Follow the cut to see what I dream up for Act 2, it’s a real show stopper, trust me

The ‘ol switcheroo – Eclipse editor changes, what does it all mean?

Now playing: Editor roulette!

Dear Eclipse (is this your first letter?),

You’ve got a LOT of people up in arms… well make that Summit Entertainment has got a lot of people crazed and scared from the recent news about an editing switch on you. The Hollywood Insider (Entertainment Weekly) just reported that Art Jones, the editor for Eclipse has been replaced with Nancy Richardson the editor from Twilight. So of course this has everyone in the Twidom wondering what in the HALE is going on with you, Eclipse. What does this mean for the movie? Is it good, is it bad? Are we doomed to never see some Wolf on Vampire action?

So of course I went straight to my source for all editing information and news, MY BROTHER! As is our tradition here at LTT, he has a super special fake name which is pretty awesome. He is: Hatchet! Oh editing jokes, you are hilarious. So I went to the Hatchet cause I knew he’d level with me since he is a film editor himself, he has experience in such matters. I emailed him the post and said “give me your HONEST opinion, what does this mean?” And here is his response…

The Hatchet says*…

Well, I’d say it means the studio is not happy with the cut, so they brought in a new editor to look at the material with fresh eyes. Bad news for Eclipse?  Not always… Bringing in a new editor can really help make a movie better, but only if there’s good material in the footage they shot. However, it explains why there’s been no footage shown or even a teaser…

I’d love to know what’s actually going on behind the scenes, but I am only assuming there’s trouble in paradise.  There could be a rift between the studio and the director (aka creative differences), the film could not be testing well, or many other reasons. Remember, Summit has a ton of money on the line here both currently and in the future.  They have every right to make whatever personnel changes thy think will better the final film.  Replacing editors is somewhat common in Hollywood, but its interesting that this switch was publicized.

Bringing Slade in seemed like a move to give Eclipse a darker edge (which I’ve been told is the tone of the book).  I wonder if the studio is scared of it being too dark (aka not appealing to younger viewers) or simply wasn’t pleased with what Slade was bringing to the table any longer. If Slade was fired from the film, Art Jones, his editor, probably found himself in limbo.  Should he stay or should he go?  This is one option.

If Slade is still at the helm of Eclipse, it must have been hard for him to replace Jones, because the director-editor relationship is the most intimate of all of a films collaborations. And especially since Slade and Jones have had a good history.

Hollywood is a crazy place and the story behind this switch could be more or less dramatic than I’ve imagine.

However, I feel that if the movie was in really serious jeopardy, they’d bring a better editor than Richardson. She doesn’t exactly have an amazing list of credits and it sounds like she’s coming in because the studio feels comfortable with her (because of her work on the first film) and might just want someone to do their bidding.

Summit, if you want a real editor to come fix your film… Call Me!
Hatchet

Further proving our letter to David Slade earlier in the year when we asked where and when we were going to finally see some of his promised sneak peeks of the new film. So it looks as though some folks are’t so happy with the first cut of the movie but why is that? Could it be Slade’s darker style of film making? The studio wanting to cut a lighter version for it’s audience (you don’t need to, FYI!)? Or was it something else entirely different? We’ll never know until E!’s true Hollywood Story: The Twilight Saga comes out in like 1o years… so we came up with some fake possibilities:

Feel free to edit this hairline out, thx

• Was Bella’s wig just too unbelievable, even for a bunch of middle aged suits who probably don’t notice things like hair?

• Everyone one had their shirts on. Not enough shirtless men running around?

• Did Carlisle’s “Killers” shirt make it into the cut making him look like a crazy psycho murderer of local teen boys instead of the gentle town doctor?

• Was the tent scene a little too intense and we see Taylor copping a feel on Bella in the sleeping bag while Robert is preoccupied with the zipper on the tent door?

• Was Riley aka Xavier Samuel just too hot it was overshadowing the other dudes, whatever their names are Smaylor and Edmund?

• Everyone was breathing too regularly. Not enough gasps or lip biting to differentiate this as a Twilight film.

Yup, 2nd editor... 2 times the charm??

• Slade and Jones hadn’t picked a new color palette for Eclipse. Twilight had blue and New Moon went for earthy browns and green but Eclipse was just normal. FAIL.

So without being in the inner sanctum we’ll never know but thanks to the Hatchet we have a little better understanding that this isn’t necessarily a doom and gloom scenario. It could end up being a really good thing. Or it could end up tinted red. We’ll just have to see come June 30.

117 Days,
Themoonisdown

Give the Hatchet a big hand for lending his expert editing opinion! So what do YOU think? Does this make you nervil? Would you not go see Eclipse if it was “dark,” Do you have any speculations as to who they changed editors? SPILL!

Our internet game is still ridiculous: The Forum, LTR, Twitter

*Note: this is purely hypothesis and the Hatchet has ZERO connection to the films in anyway and this is speculation based purely on personal experience in the industry. Please take this as such. THX!*

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News on Breaking Dawn Production aka NO news on Breaking Dawn Production!

Dear Twilight and well, Breaking Dawn I suppose…

Today two posts came out referencing news behind the production of Breaking Dawn. While a few months ago we all thought making BD was a foregone conclusion and Summit was just waiting for New Moon to shatter box office records to make it official it’s been almost a month and a half since New Moon’s release and still no announcement. Since news on the twi front has been about as sparse as smiles at a KStew photoshoot, so any sort of news to come out will indefinitely make waves. But after reading both posts from the bitchtastic Ted C and a dude in his mom’s basement in North East Philly we learn… exactly… NOTHING. Why yes, it’s like a Robsten rumor… a lot of drama, a lot of words, a lot of retweets, a lot of “maybe’s” but no actual substance or truth. Someone at the LA Times spoke with producer Wyck Godrey and got this bit of totally evasive information regarding the splitting of BD into two films  “…If it’s not organic, I don’t think it will be done, and if it is, it will be…” Wow, heavy.

Breaking Dawn = tons more creepy images made by fans!

So we still don’t know if it will be made into two films (please say yes), whether Summit will hire geneticists to create a human vampire hybrid in their lair of doom (aka studio offices in Santa Monica) to play Renesmee, whether Taylor Lautner will in fact act out imprinting on a newborn baby, if Nikki Reed and KStew can patch up their differences long enough to play convincing as frenemies on screen, will Jacob and Leah spend 3/4ths of the movie running around the perimeter of the Cullen’s house “on patrol” thus reenacting the most boring parts of BD, will there be a behind the scene documentary on the making of Isle Esme which features all the “fade to black” scenes they cut out?

Sooooo many questions and ZERO answers.

Find out what we DO know about Breaking Dawn after the jump

For Kristen Stewart, a guide to keeping men happy

puttin' out the vibes

Dear Kristen,

On the day we finally declare peace in the Rob fandom by linking arms and uniting in one voice to declare “We are the Rob, We are the Fandom,” you go and stir the shit. Of course you would. Kinda makes me like you a bit too- ain’t nothing like rattling a hornets nest with the news that Micheal Arangano aka Oregano might actually be in Vancouver. Yup, the same Vancouver that you and the rest of the Eclipse cast is in (oh and that dude you’ve been seen with- Rob Whateverson- happens to be there too.) I kind of really want you to be seen one day with Oregano doing that lovely-dovey shiz like you all did in April and then the next day been seen all double O style with Rob because then you would be a Lady Pimp, Man Killer, and I would be forced into maybe, quite possibly, LOVING YOUR FACE. If you were stringing both of these boys along, making them fly to other countries, hide under hoods, buy you dinner, comb out your mullet and then get the H out of bed once you were finished with them, I would give you the biggest high five ever. EVER. Just the thought of it makes me smile and want to yell “Girl Power!” (Spice up your life!).

A look of pure want. Wanting 2 boys that is

So since we have no real confirmation as to validity of this other than the ALWAYS valid Splash News *ahem* I’m going to speculate that it’s totally true and Oregano really is up there in Vancouver and the reason you didn’t go to the cast dinner last weekend was because it was Oregano’s day and not Rob’s, so like any good Lady Pimp you sent Rob along to the dinner to be watched over by your frenemie Nikki Reed while you, or should I say while Oregano, attended to your “needs.” I’m so kinda proud! Since you are 19, however, I have a feeling you’ve just recently tapped into your Lady Pimp Man Killer essence so you’re new at this and might be in need of a few tips from some seasoned sluts professionals. So out of the goodness of my heart, and as a sign of goodwill and Rob-peace, I’ve put together a little guide for you with the help of some pals:

Follow the cut to see the rules!

Rob and Kristen spotted in Hollywood, the story

*in light of all that’s happened over the last 24hrs, make your own assumptions, look at the pics, and take everything with a grain of salt and decide if it really matters to you. We’re still fans of the books and movies and that’s what matters!*

Dear LTT-ers, gossip hounds, lookie loos, Robstens and Nonstens-

Here’s my story as it appears partially on Radar Online.

First you must know that we are mostly “don’t get a crapsten,” around here. We’ve presented both sides of the Robsten vs Nonsten side and have left it up to you to decide. And once again in light of what’s happened we take that stance again. So without further adieu here are the deets as it happened.

Last night fellow fan and pal Ashley and I went out to the Hotel Cafe to catch the Bobby Long show cause well he has amazing music and ya never know there’s always a chance! We roll up to the venue grab some prime standing location next to the front of the stage near the front door emergency exit. So we’re cooking along, beverages in hand, meet the lovely Emmelouwhoo and settle in to enjoy Bobby’s music. A few songs in around 10PM we hear someone pounding on that front exit and a few of us glance over there in time to see Marcus Foster walked in followed by Rob Pattinson in that unmistakable black beanie (and apparently Kristen who we didn’t see till later) and don’t catch anything else cause I turn around to confirm with Emmeloowhoo and Ashley that I was not in fact having Bella style visions of Rob flashing in my head. And they can confirm that it was indeed Rob in the flesh. We saw him for about all of a second as they made a quick step to the right of the door behind a very small curtain. At this point I was looking for my Comic Con preparedness kit because we all needed a paper bag for hyperventilating because I was standing one person away from this curtain.

A few songs pass and we notice that the crowd wasn’t freaking out, so we surmised that it was either because this is LA and most folks hardly get star struck after living here a few years or in fact they really did sneak in almost undetected. Now as much as I will rep for LA, judging by our own silent freak outs, I don’t think most of them would have stayed that nonchalant had they known Rob was maybe a foot or two away from them.

It was nearing the end of the set and a few songs at the end Bobby glances over to that little curtained off area and a little look of recognition passes and he smiles and give them the nod. At this point we knew Bobby was ending his set so we made the executive decision to divide and conquer and head for the front. It was pretty obvious he wouldn’t leave through the crowd of people and that he would head straight back out that front exit.

Ashley and I headed for the front and hung out against the wall. It was us, a valet dude, a hobo and two German chicks. No paparazzi, no nothing. Then things started happened. The door opened and Marcus rushed out right into the street and hailed a cab. At this point we knew he was headed out. Marcus gets the cab (about 1030) as close as he can which is probably about 20 feet or less from where we were standing and they would definitely have to walk in front of us. Then Marcus walks back to the door, and out comes Rob!! Yes, I saw Rob Pattinson and he walked in front of me. If I had reached out my hand I would have touched him. He walked half bent over (like in the photo) and booked it for the cab. NO bodyguards! We had a few seconds to look at him and then shocker of shockers right behind him by a few feet walks Kristen Stewart! At that point we are both shocked because we did not see her walk in. She walks fast by us doing that patented KStew hair thing and awkward walk to follow Rob and Marcus out to the cab. Marcus jumps into the cab first, followed by Rob who half flies in and then Kristen jumps in and they speed off crouching down. Because I am half shocked I get one pic of them jumping into the cab and one of the cab speeding away towards Sunset. Sorry for the shizzy quality but I didn’t want to use the flash and it is from my blackberry. As much as I would love to scoop it with a better picture, that’s really not my style and I thought a lot about even posting that one (ask the gals who went with me).

Now that is the whole story. Take from it what you want, make your own assumptions but mine are as follows…

• Rob, Kristen and Marcus came to see Marcus and Rob’s friend Bobby play a show

• There was NO touchy-feel-y business happening from what we saw of them leaving or from behind the curtain. I feel as though if they had been doing anything behind that curtain the very immature girls next to us would have flipped out and we would have seen something through the flimsy curtain

• That curtain area is less than the size of my arms outstretched. Any shenanigans could be because of that and if Rob and Kristen were touching than Rob was definitely SPOONING Marcus too as it is TINY!

• They left somewhat separately. A known paparazzi trick is to walk far enough apart so they can’t be shot together, but there were no paparazzi

• Rob practically ran from the door to the cab leaving Kristen to shuffle to the cab by herself

• He gets in the cab first, doesn’t touch her or allow her to jump in first. If they were together I would think he’d wait for her and allow her to get in. Who knows though

• Both of them being together in public at all could point to the fact either they’re together or just don’t care

• A good portion of that small audience did not see this or know anything went down as evidenced by the fact no one was talking about it after the show minus a small group (us and the hobo!)

Our small group thinks they’re either JUST friends (meh) or totally friends with benefits but don’t lean towards any official couple status. Again proof = truth and this is just a picture of them getting into a cab with Marcus after seeing a friend play.

So there ya have it… are they together? Are they not? Does it make a difference to you? What say you?!
Themoonisdown

take the cut to see another picture and video from the show…

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Rachelle Lefevre out as Victoria and we want to know WHY?

Dear Summit-

We have one question for you: WHY?

We’ve never written you a letter before, but I think it’s time to break our silence. Now that we’ve read both the personal statement from Rachelle, your Press Release sighting “scheduling conflicts,” and now the 2nd press release sighting another film, we’d like to know the REAL REASON WHY the character of Victoria was recast. With only one film left to go in Victoria’s character arc, this is one of the biggest surprise moves you could have pulled (and at the 11th hour we might add.)

Now don’t immediately write us off as some simpering fansite looking for something to write about. We know the entertainment business is a fickle and mean bitch. Deals are created, moves are made, everything’s political, believe me: we KNOW! We both have worked and continue to work in entertainment and understand stuff happens schedules conflict, contract options don’t get picked up, and there are ALWAYS two sides to every story, but that’s not what happened here. It is clear from both your statement and Rachelle’s that she was screwed. She admits a scheduling conflict that you were trying to work through it and says she would have dropped the movie Barney’s Version if she had known her role as Victoria was going to be recast. So the question remains and we want to know, WHY?

Follow the cut to see our full letter and some of our guesses as to why…

Kristen Stewart, pregnant with Rob’s lovechild? Or just bloated?

Touching somewhere NEAR her stomach... it MUST be true!

Dear LTT-ers, Robstenites, Nonstenites, and general gossip hounds,

Recently a most outrageous “news” story began circulating around the interwebs. Rag mags, gossip sites and weirdos alike have been reporting that Kristen Stewart is pregnant! Yes, the 19 year old, barely legal, girl from Zathura, the chosen one of Stephenie Meyer, aka Bella is allegedly PREGNANT. Now I’m not one to believe most stuff from the Rag mags until the star themselves confirm it. But what’s the fun in waiting? So I’ve gathered together a panel of obsessed freaks experts on the subject of all things Twilight, Kristen and pregnancy. We’re going to treat this like our very own cable news show so sit back and relax as we bring you all the facts, reactions and advice on:

HARDBALL with Themoonisdown

Hello and welcome to our very first addition of Hardball, today is Friday, July 10th, 2009 and here’s what we know on the Kristen Stewart might be pregnant news front…

The Aussie tab’s insider says, “When [Stewart] worked out she was late, she obviously started to thinking that she could be pregnant. And because of the timing, she thinks Rob could be the father.”

The gossip mag also reports she had a friend buy a home pregnancy test for her and that she is “very nervous about the whole situation.”

As evidence, the mag ran a shot of Stewart with a small round belly on the set of her upcoming film, “The Runaways.”

Naturally reps for Stewart and Pattinson have not confirmed whether there is any truth to the New Weekly’s report.

Click to enlarge the NEWS

As it stands this is what we know: Kristen Stewart is supposedly “late” in getting her monthly visitor. And of course thinks that a one Mr. Robert Pattinson is the father, nevermind her ex-boyfriend who from all accounts she was still with 2-3 months ago. Kristen Stewart has an unknown “friend” buy her a pregnancy test. And finally as physical evidence we have a photo of Kristen from the set of the Runaways with what reporters are calling a “small round belly.”

I turn now to my panel of highly esteemed journalists, Robsten followers, snarky commenters and legal experts for their reactions… Let’s play Hardball!

LOOK AWAY FROM HIS EYES!!

First up from the always on top of it Rob Pattinson site “Robsessed” we have the lovely Gozde. What is your opinion of the news that Kristen might be pregnant with Rob’s love child?

Gozde: Rob can impregnate with a stare, true story, but for this time I say ‘What a Load of Crap’

Moon: As proof Gozde has brought along this lovely picture at right to help prove her point. Can we get that on the screen now? (look to your left) *sees rob* Uh… yea I’m gonna have to say you might be right… I feel my ovaries spontaneously ovulating… NEXT expert! Quickly!!

Kristin: *interupting* “I would also like to mention that after seeing pictures of Rob and Ruby (his pint sized costar for Remember Me) together, my uterus spontaneously impregnated itself, so if there is a babymama, It’s me, spelled with an IN. Just in case you were all wondering…”

Moon: Well, I guess we’ve proven your point Gozde, maybe a Kristen IS pregnant from his stares, it just might be OUR KristIN, instead. Why don’t we toss this to the super wonderful TwiCrackAddict for her take. What do you think TwiCrack, pregnant or not?

TwiCrackAddict: “Hullo? If having a lil’ pooch is evidence of being knocked up, then people must think that my ever-present Food-Induced-Belly-Bump is an indication that I’m pregnant with sextuplets these days. Sorry, I’m just puffy and eat too much ice cream”

Follow the cut to see what else the panel has to say, and IS SHE PREGNANT?? Come back after this commercial break