Ashley Greene, Kristen Stewart and Dakota Fanning praying in the name of Rob in Italy

Dear Ashley, Kristen and Dakota-

I see that Kellan finally wore you down and you had a meeting of the girls accountability group of New Moon and decided to induct Dakota Fanning into the fold… how sweet of you gals!

Say 'Facebook!' No say 'Rob DO ME!'

First, Ashley decided to document the occasion because of course my BFF is like me and will inevitably scrapbook the moment for posterity to remember the day Dakota joined the league of girls “Praying and Fasting for a better New Moon.” The movement originally started by our dear Lula and continues till November 20 when we will find out if our prayers have been answered. Obviously you girls know how important this is so you started off the meeting with a round of prayer…

Kristen Stewart was just at a Women of the Word conference (obviously) and decided to begin after feeling the leading of the Holy Spirit and it went a little something like this…

KStew: Dear God we come to you today in front of the paparazzi and the crazy psycho set stalkers to say we are so thankful to be sweating our boobs off  filming here in Italy and want to welcome our newest sister in the Lord the Meyer, Dakota Fanning. Let her light shine to all she comes in contact with, though not Rob because he should only be seeing MY light, but anyway we ask for a hedge of protection around Dakota from all the whacky Pattinson pants girls and scary Twimoms, keep her safe and away from their Chico’s daywear grasp…

Dakota: Dear God, thank you for these special girls and may we all become closer than fake lesbians now that NReed is out of the picture… oh and an extra special blessing for my agent and manager for making a teen girls dream come true by taking me away from Oscar potential scripts and getting me this two-bit part and bringing me this much closer to Robert Pattin-

*interrupting* KStew: Uh that’s enough Dakota, don’t want to wear you out the first time, ASHLEY your turn, NOW!

Ashley: Huh? uh.. OH! I’m up… Dear God, after this whole accountability thingy is over please please please let us find an open Sephora store here in Montepulciano because all of us are out of concealer! Seriously, look at us, we’re out in public praying on a rooftop looking haggard, we NEED some MAC ‘studio stick’ coverage stat. Oh and please impress upon Jackson’s heart that he should ‘kiss groupies goodbye’ and shack up with me instead. Uh and thanks for Dakota, her presence helps give this little dog and pony show we call New Moon some much needed credibility.

And we all said AAAAAAMEN!

Then the always classy Kristen gave the watching paparazzi a little one finger blessing…

Jesus loves you too!!

Spoken like a true prophetess! Don’t miss KStew on BET’s Sunday Best and next year on tour with Juanita Bynum bringing the word like only SHE can!

Your sister in the Meyer,
Themoonisdown

PS Don’t forget to check out our daily letters to Rob and see UC get him drunk!
Oh and chat about it all over at the forum!

Robert Pattinson and Emile Hirsch work Kristen Stewart

Blonde Kristen bosses his around

Dear Kristen,

Did you about DIE when you saw who went out to dinner last night? Yep- Emile Hirsch (your co-star in Into the Wild, of course) and Robert Pattinson (your lover uh special friend?) You were probably shakin’ in your fugly hipster shoes, wondering what they were talking about, right? Don’t worry… we sent our spies in with a tape recorder and they caught the entire conversation. Enjoy!

Love,
UnintendedChoice and theMoonisDown

Brunette Kristen lets him lead

Scene: In a dimly lit restaurant called Michaelangelo in Cannes, France. Emile Hirsch sits across from Robert Pattinson. Rob picks up his fork and puts a ravioli in his mouth. Emile picks up his fork, like he’s about to indulge in a piece of chicken parm, but stops and says,

Emile: So how you likin’ Kristen? The girl can hang, ifyouknowwhati’msayin’
Rob: (almost choking, realizing the conversation they’re about to have…) Uh, she’s great. We’re good friends. How did you like working with her?
Emile: Well man, to tell you the truth, she knows how she wants it to be done. We had to take our time on everything. “Slow and easy wins the race” was her motto
Rob: Really? she was more timid with me. Allowed me to lead
Emile: WOW we must be talking a different gal cause she was insane. Always commanding me how to do it and which way was best. Fast, slow, again- time after time. Totally wore me out
Rob: (somewhat defensively) Well, I mean.. I see saw that side of her…. especially when she was drinking… she got a little aggressive.
Emile: you guys drank on the job?
Rob: (a little confused) Uh, we did one time.. It was someone’s birthday, I think….
Emile: Well we didn’t drink. It was natural every time. She wanted to remember everything- be “totally in the moment,” she said
Rob: (obviously hurt b/c Kristen must’ve been drank a lot) I think being drunk loosened her up… I mean… she said it was fun.. but maybe… I dunno… maybe she….
Emile: (cutting Rob off) Wow, man! This sounds like a totally different Kristen, every time we were in front of cameras she brought her A game
Rob: She let you use a camera? I tried that once, but she freaked out- something about something that happened with Paris Hilton one time
Emile: (blank scare… and silence….. )
Rob: (awkward rambling now) It was a good thing anyway, because then Oregano knocked on the hotel door… and she flipped out and couldn’t find her clothes. which was ironic because it was her first time doing it completely naked- she usually keeps at least one article of clothing on.. she claims it’s some sort of “protection” thing.. (although I really just think she’s a “never nude”) It was a mess dude. Taught me to never eff your costars!
Emile: (silence) Uh wait, what are we talking about here?
Rob: uh… hooking up with Kristen?
Emile: (silence)
Rob: (sensing his discomfort) I mean, I didn’t know for sure that you guys did.. She never told me- she doesn’t talk about her exes like that (well, except for Oregano) so when you started talking about it, I just rolled with it and pretended I knew… sorry… It’s kinda awkward isn’t it? Wondering if she compared us…. I mean-
Emile: (cutting Rob off) Dude, you asked me about working with Kristen. I was just talking about acting with her!
Rob: Uh, what? Ummm. Hmm?… oh look- there’s a Russian chick with big boobs…!

Welcome to our first LTT “Role Play.” Don’t worry, we DID joke about putting on lingere and said “let’s cyber” at least 3 times. And we even have a “safe word” (cinnamon). Also- we felt way 2nd hand embarrassed, yet we suffered through it- because that’s what good bloggers do- role play awkward situations between two somewhat sorta greasy actors….

After the break see an amazing video of Emile & Rob. Watch out! It’s really amazing: