Birthday Wishes for Robert Pattinson from the Twilight crew

Dear Rob,

Yes. We realize there is an entire site dedicated to you (LetterstoRob, holla) but today is ALL about YOU! It is your birthday, afterall! So happy birthday from us, UC & Moon. We’re just popping in here quickly to tell you we collected birthday wishes or gifts from your favorite castmates from The Twilight Saga. And boy are they awesome! We hope you enjoy them!

Love,
UC & Moon

PS don’t forget to check out the party at the forum in YOUR honor and the very special edition of Letters to Rob!

this could be YOU rob! (click to enlarge! trust!)

this could be YOU rob! (click to enlarge! trust!)

Jackson Rathbone
For your birthday, you get to spend some time in the Banana suit that randomly travels around with my band, 100Monkeys. Don’t question the reason for the banana. Just jump in the suit and have a good time. Oh, and try not to sweat too much. That thing is a bitch to wash so we haven’t done it, ever. But don’t worry- we bought it only slightly used and it’s been around since ’92, so it’s good quality. Happy birthday, banana man!

Kellan Lutz

Friends are friends forever if the Lord's the Lord of them

Friends are friends forever if the Lord's the Lord of them

Today, Rob, I am burdened with prayer for you. I committ, as your accountability partner, to spend at least one hour in constant prayer for you today. I will pray for a variety things such as your inability to get over Kristen, your smoking habit, for your protection from the Pattinson Pants & Pattinson Tattoo ladies and that you will find the strength to do the necessary exercises to obtain a 6 pack such as mine. I’d also love to go clubbing with you later, if you’re up for it. I met some smokin’ hot ladies in Hollywood last night that I bet we can witness to, ifyouknowwhatimsaying (wink wink!). Prayin’ that it’s a kick-ass birthday, man!

Eat your heart out Rob!

Eat your heart out Rob!

Ashley Greene

Rob, it’s clear to me that you need another $103 LNA zip-up hoodie so I’m gonna take you to Kitson to get one! It’s on me.. No, no no, I don’t want you paying. Oh fine, you can contribute your budgeted amount for a hoodie. What’s that $40 or $50..? Oh… three dollars? Are you kidding me? Robbie, I think they charge more than that to walk in the door at Kitson…. Oh well, Happy Birthday anyway you cheap-ass friend. Oh and seriously you like THOSE girls more than me?? Hummmppphh. Maybe I should get you a brain and a pair of eyeballs for your birthday instead of a hoodie.
XO

Hair hair haaaair, long beautiful hair!

Hair hair haaaair, long beautiful hair!

Rachelle Lefevre

Hey Rob, as we all know one of the main things you’re known for is your hair. I mean remember all the hoopla in December when you cut it off? Or all the questions on the Twilight press junket about your hair and how you never wash it and how it has a life of it’s own? Yea, well we all remember it very well cause we were asked non stop about it. Thanks. So for your birthday I’m going to give you free hair tips since mine is so faboo. I’m also going to teach you how to wash it every few days so people will stop asking that question! I’ll also introduce you to this awesome dry shampoo that you spray into your hair to soak up the grease. It’s a gift

Forget those little girls Rob... grrrr!

Forget those little girls Rob... grrrr!

from God himself. And then I’ll let you let me scratch your head and massage your hair follicles to encourage growth. What? You’ve never heard of that? Just go with it babe. Trust me.

Elizabeth Reaser

Rob, I saw how you were looking at me during the Vanity Fair photoshoot. You couldn’t keep your eyes off me, if I do say so myself. So for your birthday I’m going to teach you the ways of a real mature woman! Forget these GIRLS… I’ll show you ALL the tricks you’ll ever need and then leave you wanting more you’ll be prepared for your future girlfriends.

M-I-C-K-E-Y M-O-U-S-E!!

M-I-C-K-E-Y M-O-U-S-E!! (click to enlarge)

Taylor Lautner

Hey man, it’s a big day for you and I know you have to juggle a lot what with you “being” Edward and all the crazy fans who follow you to your hotel and trying to put off the fact that everyone thinks you and Kristen are bumping uglies. Let me give you a pointer: get with a Disney girl and walk around with umbrellas and hug in the rain. Everyone will be too blinded by the cuteness to ever care or think to care about you two doing da nasty. TRUST.

Oh and Selena told me to tell you she’ll let you know what happens at the end of this season of Wizards of Waverly Place if you’ll autograph her Edward body glitter container.

Some Enchanted Evening. Prom: 1990never

Some Enchanted Evening. Prom: 1990never

Stephenie Meyer

Rob for your birthday I want to rewrite Breaking Dawn so that Bella chooses Jacob and you Edward realizes his mistake and he actually marries Ms. Stephenie Meyer Cope, the older more mature woman in Twilight and you take her off to Isle Esme. I’m also going to rewrite the part where you Edward takes my Ms. Cope’s hand and pulls her DEEPER into the water… to read more like my actual NC-17 dream that I had about how the honeymoon REALLY went down. So if you’ll fly down to Phoenix this weekend we can just run through a couple positions ideas I’ve come up with and see what works and what doesn’t. You’ll glower and I’ll show my chagrin and it’ll be awesome! This is really going to be AVN Oscar Awards worthy! I can’t wait!!!

Sunday Morning Worship – Girls of Twilight

Dear LTT Worshipers (mostly the dudes today!) and ladies of Twilight-

In light of all the recent brouhaha over the  release of the Wolfpack official picture, the ET promo clips where we swooned hardcore over Jacob, the whole Jackson and the bat thing and well of course our main squeeze Rob we thought we’d spend this Sunday fawning over the ladies of Twilight. After all we thought it was time to throw you guys a bone for putting up with all our crazy fangirl-ness.

Really can we blame you? These ladies are HOT and deserved to be drooled over… so dear Sunday morning worshipers join with me and sing the praises of the ladies of Twilight…

rachellebluetop
Oh Rachelle how we love thee… and covet your beautiful red hair… trust me I ask for this color every time I sit down in the stylists chair. But no one can pull it off quite like you do! You’re like the classy girl everyone wanted to be in college but somehow couldn’t achieve.

nikkireedblack

Ohhh Nikki… there’s just something about you. Something just under the surface that I can never quite figure out. You seem like the girl that’s friends with all the boys and pals around with them. And I gotta love and respect that cause I’m the same way. I kinda hate to admit it but I feel like if we ever really knew each other we’d be friends cause we’re too similar not to be.

elizabethreaser
Elizabeth Reaser, we don’t talk enough about you here but you bring just that extra touch of class that this production needs. You ARE Esme and we love you for that. Oh and we totally think Rob had a thing for you at the Vanity Fair photoshoot. Seriously, watch the tapes and look at the pics. Just saying…

salute
This one’s for you Armyunicorn! A salute from KStew to you! This probably has to be one of my top 2 favorite pictures of Miss Stewart. It not only showcases her underlying beauty that she usually keeps under wraps but is also one of the most kickin’ wardrobe choices for her. THE SHOES, please! Ok, sorry I know this is for the menfolk, sorry. Look at those stems!

vintageashleyfur
Ashley! What else is there to say about our BFF but hot damn?! And we seriously don’t know what is wrong with the boys of Twilight that they haven’t snatched you up yet. Seriously! Oh and to one of our other Unicorns Jordan, this one’s for you!

Happy Sunday… as you leave please remain mindful of those who wish to stay and worship a little while longer!
Themoonisdown

The Twilight Saga makes me speak my mind

Dear Twilight lovers,

In the style of our dear friend Lauren from Lauren’s Bite, I am going to speak my mind about some recent things I’ve seen or heard, all in 8 words or less:

1. Loving the Jackson-Kristen handhold, need more Rob.

2. Probably shouldn’t have mentioned going to Italy. Creepedherout*

Fan meets Kristen Stewart in bathroom

*yes that was nine words.. so? it deserved it.

3. Hells no they ain’t paying Aro £5mil

michael-sheen-aro-new-moon-volturiSource

4. I’ve got nothing. Couldn’t watch past 1st song

5. Rachelle, be my bff. You are so gorgeous

victoriafanposterfound on New Moon Movie

kristenlambbunny

Kristen says, “Hoppy Easter”

Love,

UnintendedChoice


Twi-Dirt: The interactive Sleepy Saturday Edition

Dear Twilight Fans around the globe,

On this sleepy Saturday (it is currently Friday as I’m writing this, but I’m anticipating a sleepy Saturday) we bring you another round of Twi-dirt- our semi-occasionally-not very often word vomit of Twilight-related news. Today we thought we’d spice it up & instead of our usual hilarious sentence with a link to the news we are going to be more interactive. (We don’t feel there is enough interaction on our two sites- the 800-1,000 daily comments on LTR posts aren’t enough for us) All of today’s dirt can be found (with one teeny exception) within today’s post. This will ensure you don’t have to leave our site, ever.  What else is there to do on a sleepy Saturday anyway?

Enjoy! Happy Sleepy Satuday!

Love,
UnintendedChoice & theMoonisDown

  • “Twilight’s kinda a big deal” and this parody BLEW OUR MINDS!
    a
  • This one is not for children because it’s too hilarious and children shouldn’t be surrounded by hilarious things:
    a
    Vodpod videos no longer available.

The mindblowing continues after the cut…

Cam Gigandet – Our fave nomadic trashy vampire!

Dear Cam-

We don’t talk nearly enough about the nomadic vampires around here… well besides our BFF Rachelle! We thought it was time we paid homage to our 2nd favorite BAD vamp (yes, Rachelle/Victoria will always be our first) and your awesome portrayal of James. Don’t tell anyone but sometimes when I’m watching the movie or reading the book I wish you would have gone a little off script and totally killed Bella. I mean all that whining and blinking and crap gets old after a while. But I guess they wouldn’t let that happen, what with killing the heroine and needing to finish the rest of saga and all. Oh well, a girl can dream can’t she?

So anycrap…

First can we talk about how flipping cute you are in the Gap ads? During Christmas you were the only thing keeping me from going postal in the mall. Whenever I was feeling particularly NOT FULL OF CHEER I would find the nearest Gap and look at your face and then know I could make it through a few more stores…

jamescamSeriously though, can we talk about your wig/look in Twilight? I mean we know they screwed up everyone else’s wigs but yours looked especially white-trashy. And maybe that’s the look they were going for but I was thinking they should have gone more just plain HOT cause you’re a vampire after all and totes cute sauce in real life!

It’s kinda too bad they killed you off… well maybe not, watching Alice rip your head off is just “good programming.”

But if they somehow figured out a way for you to come back and reek havoc on Forks or just sneak in and slap Bella I wouldn’t be mad!

XO
Themoonisdown

PS who else is feeling Cam? Did anyone totally want to DO trashy James?

Moment of shameless self promotion: have you voted for us today in the Dazzle Awards as your favorite Rob Fansite (I mean really is there any other?) And since there was no category for Favorite Cam site, you gotta head over there and pick the next best thing. LTR!!

One picture, two takes: Jacksper’s edition

IIIiiiii'm throwing my arms around jacksper... i mean paris

Close your mouth and open up your heart and baby satisfy me!

Take One:

Dear Jacksper-

It’s awesome to see that you’ve taken up a part time job as an Elvis impersonator to fill all your down time while filming New Moon.

So tell me, do the grandma’s swoon when you sing “Hunka Hunka Burnin’ Love” or perhaps they cry when you croon “Fools Rush In?”

But what I really want to see if you in a sequined jumpsuit doing “A Little Less Conversation” with KStew, NReed and Rachelle as your back up singers. That would blow that 100 Monkeys nonsense out of the water! Trust me.

Watch out Vegas, there’s a new star in town!

A little more bite, a little less bark!
Themoonisdown

Maria! I just met a guy in the Marine's named Maria!

Maria! I just met a guy in the Marines named Maria!

Take Two

Dear Jackson,

I’m trying to put my finger on the vibe I’m getting from your hair, and I’m a little confused. I’m feeling like you’re either going for the “Hi! I’m Jacksper Rathbone, and I look like a skunk” look or are secretly part of the gay Marine core.

Oh, I know what it is!  You’ve been feeling left out that Cam & Rob were asked to do that Vanity Fair “West Side Story” shoot last Spring that you are trying to convince the VF editors that you look the part, as well.  With hair like that, I bet you have killer dance moves, right?

Lovin’ the locks,
UnintendedChoice

Source

Pillow fight!

HAIR! must have NOW!

HAIR! must have NOW!

Dear Rachelle and Ashley-

Seriously girls, we should really just forget this letters thing and be best friends. I’m scheduling mani/pedi’s for tomorrow then we’re gonna come back to my place for a good ol fashioned sleepover with all the LTT/LTR ladies. We’ll eat thin mint cookies (out of the freezer of course), braid each others hair and crank call Rob to ask him if his ‘refrigerator is running.’ Then after a few too many mimosas we’ll make Taylor (our DD, we’re responsible girls!) drive us to the valley so we can T.P. Nikki Reed’s house.

Just think about it…

Best friends forever!
themoonisdown