Taylor Lautner and Selena Gomez come out. Officially.

And they called it puuupppyyyy looooveeee

And they called it puuupppyyyy looooveeee

Dear Taylor-

Looks like someone had the DTR* talk recently!! I can’t say how excited I am for you two… you’re so cute I just want to squeeze you like a couple of cabbage patch kids!

As a girl with an ass ton of guy friends I can say with some authority that I believe a DTR talk has occurred because unless you two are underage drunk in broad daylight on the sidewalk in front of the paps, no one goes for the under the boob side grab. Not even good friends.

Have your fun and kick out the jams with Selena now because puppy love is fleeting but Wolfgirl love is forever.

Your older wiser faux sister something
Themoonisdown

*for the uninitiated or those no longer in High School, DTR= “define the relationship”

Picture Source: Lainey Gossip

Weekend at Oregano’s

Come on ride the train and ride it... CHOO CHOO!

Come on ride the train and ride it... CHOO CHOO!

Dear Micheal (I won’t call you Oregano for this one)-

We saw the pictures on Lainey (where else?) today and just wanted to thank you for making Kristen smile! It seems like a long time since that ol sour puss has seemed genuinely happy and excited to doing something, even walking down the street with you! I looked at these pictures and thought, wow, she’s really pretty and having a great time with you! Unlike my usual reaction of annoyance with her.

So I was thinking what was the big deal about this weekend? Why are it so great? And I came up with these ideas… Cause this is what I sit around doing Michael, making up shiz like this… my life rules. Obviously… BUT back to the list!

01. Kristen is now 19 and you guys can party in Canada. I’m sure you two kids need a little liquid courage to get the good times rolling

02. Kristen spends all week staring at a buffed out Taylor and the Wolfpack and was ready to pounce when you showed up

03. Rob was outta town! And so was Nikki! For once you had her all to yourself, no conspiracies theories, no fake on screen vampire boyfriends, no fake lesbian lovers… just the two of you!

04. You brought up Kristen’s special bong for a visit. My how she’s missed it!

Looks like you're rehearsing your new musical "The Oregano and I"

Looks like you're rehearsing your new musical "The Oregano and I"

05.You two watched all the episodes of Will & Grace that you play Jack’s son. JUST ELLIOT! (does the *just jack hands*) Who could keep a straight face when Megan Mullally and Sean Hawes are on screen?!

And all those add up to create a recipe for a GREAT weekend! Am I right, Kristen? Am I right? (nudge nudge, wink wink!)

I mean Micheal, you must have some special motion in your ocean ifyouknowwhatimsayin’ to make her smile THIS much! I underestimated you Arangano… never again!

Nothings gonna rain on your parade!
Themoonisdown

Swoon-able Edward and Bella

Dear Edward and Bella-

Sometimes we get so caught up in Robert and Kristen we forget the main reason we’re here: YOU TWO. The love story, the butterflies in the stomach, the hot and cold, the angst-y feelings, all of it! We love it, we want it! And most of the time we could care less about those two nerds who play you guys we just want more Bellaward!

Really, they shouldn’t do this to us… I don’t know if my heart can take this much awesomeness WHILE being put to the sweet stylings of Muse covering “Can’t Take My Eyes Off of You.” Simply fanvid perfection.

PS 1:06, BEST. awwww!

PPS like this song? Got another one that ALWAYS makes you think of Twilight? Enter the contest!

A Unicorn’s Perspective

We were thrilled when we received our very first letter from a male reader. Yep, a real, live Unicorn. Jordan owns all 4 books, a “Team Edward” keychain and has convinced females to read the series. Um, our hero? I think he’s our mascot for today. Congrats, Jordan. You are today’s mascot. Today’s “Twilosophy” will be in the form of a letter from Jordan:
a
Yeah, this is Rob on a unicorn. Thanks FB flair

Yeah, this is Rob on a unicorn. Thanks FB flair

Dear woman who have fallen in love with Edward,

a
This might end up being really hard to write about without sounding completely gay, but my man-card has pretty much been permanently revoked at this point anyway, so screw it.
a
It absolutely makes sense to me why so many girls (and their moms, for that matter) are such big fans of Edward, almost as if they are legitimately frustrated that Robert Pattinson isn’t just Edward brought to life. And it’s not just Edward and how dreamy he is, or whatever, but it’s the way he looks at Bella, and the way Bella seems to just be transformed by being around him. It’s the effect they have on each other.
a
It’s a love that’s pure, unfiltered, dangerous, sexy, scary, and uncertain. That kind of feeling for each other, the intensity that flares every time they lock eyes – it’s almost blinding. Nothing else matters. It’s just magical.And honestly, I’m glad that so many women have fallen for him and wish that they could be the one to see his skin sparkle, or to stand at the top of a massive tree after being carried up on his back, or lay in a field of grass and just gaze at him.
a
I hope Edward and Bella’s incredible romance makes all those women more discerning and more willing to pay extra attention for that magic, and more likely to turn guys down who find it easier to tear them down than to lift them up.
a
We are in desperate need of more relationships like theirs. Maybe not to the extent of worrying about whether or not kissing your significant other will end up getting you bitten, but we all need to see interaction like theirs. The way they look at each other, it’s almost as if they’re the first member of the opposite sex that the other one has seen. Really, in a certain way, that’s precisely the case. Not biologically, but emotionally, because neither of them have ever seen another person the way they see each other. And they’re completely immersed in that – just stunned, and wondering how it is possible that someone could exist who can make them forget where they are and make them wonder why they ever thought anything else had any significance at all.
a
Maybe I’m delusional, but I refuse and soundly reject the notion that all of what I just mentioned, all of those feelings, have to be confined to the movies. Those feelings and those indescribable moments of wonder and of ecstasy are out there, waiting for those of us who believe in them to find them. Here’s to never accepting otherwise and being brave and hopeful enough to continue the search.”
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We <3 Unicorns!

We ❤ Unicorns!

Jordan

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So, we officially know you’re out there guys. We wanna hear from you. NOW! And to “All the single ladies,” click on Jordan’s name above to read his blog.  Maybe you can convince him to experience those “feelings and those indescribable moments of wonder and of ecstasy” with you. (Note: we have no idea who he is, how old he is and if he’s single, so we will not take responsibility if it doesn’t work out. We will, however, take responsibility if you fall madly in love as a result of “meeting” through our blog and are expecting to both be maids of honor at your wedding.)
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More Unicorn goodness here

Resolutions we promise to keep longer than a week

Dear Fellow Twilighters-

So it’s that time of year where people are looking back and getting nostalgic and making resolutions they will inevitably break in the new year… so we thought, what the heck? Let’s join in on the fun and write our twi-solutions! Seriously, we’re not going to stop with the twi-words.

welcomesign

Freaks coming to a town near you!

In 2009 we promise to…

1. Make a pilgrimage to Forks, WA and maybe drag along some pals to terrorize this lovely town.

2. Bring you coverage and live ‘Letters’ from the red carpet premiere of New Moon… are you listening Summit Entertainment marketing dept?! You need us, we’re professionals! Seriously, email us.

100monkeysny

you call this music?! why yes, I'll torture myself for your reading pleasure!

3. Torture your eyes and ears with as many 100 Monkeys videos as we can find/take/make.

4. Convince Stephenie Meyers to finish Midnight Sun in a timely fashion (like by Feb. 1st or something)

5. Make Kristen Stewart aka Sour Puss smile at least 3-4 times by our hilarious commentaries.

6. Bring you even more shirtless pictures of Kellan while making inappropriate comparisons between him and that hot guy from your youth group who was nice to everyone.

premier

Us, New Moon premiere!

7. Start to v-log occasionally (UnintendedChoice might even perform a hit like “All I want for Christmas is a Twilight Calendar” live on video)

alicehottopic

More girls! More Alice!

8. Actually start featuring more Twilight girls on this site! We love you Ashley Greene and Alice and Anna Kendrick and Angela and sometimes Kristen Stewart! Enough with these boys, girl power!

9. Keep bringing you all the best in Rob letters and mild obsessions over at LetterstoRob.com

In 2009 we promise NOT to:

1. Bore you with any more news/links of Rob Pattinson’s 2 week old haircut. Time to find something NEW to post about mainstream media! You are boring us. Try finding him playing that guitar he took back to London with him. Now THAT would be newsworthy! DUH!!

2. We promise to KEEP our promise to NEVER call Robert Pattinson: BOB. ever.

3. Not to leave you alone in your OCD– Obsessive Cullen Disorder… we’re in this together people!

Lastly, our most important resolution and promise for 2009 is:

To meet Rob Pattinson and have him fall madly in love with us.

robert_pattinson-peoples-sexiest

Feel the love in 2009!


simple enough…

XO and all the best in ’09!
-Us, themoonisdown and unintendedchoice

Do you have any twi-solutions?