We’ve got some winners!! And a lot of funny people!

Dear LTT readers,

It’s time to reveal the winners of our 2010 Valentine’s Day conversation hearts contest! We tasked you with creating your very own conversations hearts that were Twilight and Rob themed. There were no rules other than it needed to fit on a heart. And what you all came up with astounded us! You guys are SO funny and original and sometimes just plain wrong! We’ve poured over the Valentine’s entries for hours and hours and cast secret ballots for our favorites and we’ve finally come to a consensus! And here are the winners of the Letters to Twilight edition of the Valentine’s Day contest!

Drum roll please…

First place winner of Jeweled Ambrosia necklace

Larissa!! Your Chris Hansen heart killed us! So close on the heels of Taylor 18th birthday, Chris is already missing us!

2nd Place Winner of the Dwell Deep print!

Amy – seriously, we both died when we opened this one! Jacob’s weird trilingual-ism and then we read her file title “Indianish” and we knew this was a winner. Good job loca!

3rd Place Winner! Bite Me, Edward notepad from Lobotome

Alice – Not an Addikt If you can’t tell this memorable quote is on a TWEED conversation heart because you know, Edward was SERIOUS when he told Bella not to come in the woods.

Congrats Winners!!!!!!!!!!! Please email us you contact info so we can get you your awesome prize!

There were a ton of awesome entries and so as is our style we’re going to show you who won the secret awards aka NO awards but were so great we just had to share them. I bet you didn’t know these categories existed…

See them after the cut
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Return to Monday Funnies: Bella & The Beast and some teen boy humor

Dear LTT-ers,

Since it’s most folks first Monday back from the Holidays I thought we could all use a good laugh and since there’s pretty much nothing new in the Twilight world let’s have a few laughs shall we…


Bella and the Beast – Someone mashed up Beauty and the Beast and Twilight and it pretty much kills. Too bad they didn’t make Mrs. Potts as Alice.


Way to jump on the Twi train a bit late but still… Guermo from Jimmy Kimmel Live talk show takes a turn as everyone’s favorite Vampire.
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This totally appealed to the 13yr old boy inside me. YOUR MOM!
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Follow the jump for more laughs
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Amanduh is back and her sex is on fire (among other things)!

Dear LTT-ers,

A few months ago UC and I mourned the lose of AmanDUH’s YouTube channel after she deleted all her videos and we thought she was forever gone from our lives. I mean what were we going to do now without her beautiful musical stylings, without her reenactments of Twilight, without her choreography, withouth slightly special faked Edward? Die, that’s what. A world without Amanduh is not one I want to live in!
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I always thought Ashley Greene’s portrayal of Alice was missing something and I think Amanduh NAILED it!

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Covering one of the best songs of 2008 AND 2009…

(I’m pretty sure even listening to this is blasphemous)

Seriously, ALL music videos should be made by Amanaduh and ALL songs should be sung by her… come to think of it all MOVIES she be made by her too. It’s Saturday so you might as well go over to her YouTube profile and enjoy the rest of her musical stylings and show her some love.

YEAAAAAAAA her sex is on fiiirrrreeee!
Themoonisdown

One Year later and our internet game is still ridiculous: The Forum, LTR, Twitter

Best New Moon review EVER! LOL cats, 3 wolf moon, it has it all!

Dear LTT-ers,

Remember how we said we were going to stop beating a dead horse by reviewing the crap out of New Moon?! Well, JUST KIDDING! Actually this is a review done entirely in LOL cats so that alone means it’s the best review ever…

A Preview…

Just wait till they get to the Volturi cats! And the Wolfpack. DIED! Enjoy the rest of the New Moon review here at Microsuede

Enjoy your Saturday!
Themoonisdown

Love LOL cats? Hate LOL cats? Do you can has cheezburger?

Thanks Katelin for sharing and to Microsuede for making us LOL!

Our internet game is ridiculous: The Forum, LTR, Twitter

Imma give you a Cullen smile this weekend!

Dear LTT-ers and Imma Contest Participants-

Yesterday we presented you with the winners of the Imma Contest and promised that all weekend we’d be bringing you the rest of the best from the entries we received. Since there were SO many good entries and since only two special folks could win AND since  we just happened to create fake categories that just happen to fit perfectly with some of the entries and since (this is a lot of since’s)  we don’t have real prizes for all these lovely ladies, we’ve created fake ones to celebrate your amazing-ness. Cause that’s what we do here.

So here we go…

Best entry sucking up to the judges

Team Seth you win one day in fake lesbianship with us. A threesome, if you will. Rob is gonna be jealous. So is Stephenie.

Best entry featuring a dead artist from Sun Records – It’s a TIE!!!

Alice and Bella from Not an Addikt – You win a tube of ointment for that burning ring of yours. Ouch.

AND


@Chelseaheptig you win a lifetime’s supply of Dippity Doo hair gel and a peanut butter banana sandwich made by Edward Cullen himself

Follow the cut to see more Imma entries!
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Monday Funnies, riffing on Twilight

Dear Twilight Movie,

You are so ridiculous sometimes you make the jokes too easy. Even for old dudes who know nothing about Twilight. So when I found this videos I knew we had to share them for Monday Funnies. This is some old dude sings his interpretation of Bella’s Lullaby, written by Edward. It may be back to work time but you don’t have to frown… just hum this whenever you boss asks you to stay late this week


“I want to chomp into you throaaaat… and watch you bleed out on the floor” Yup, I have definitely had that exact sentiment about several past bosses. Now all together!


And now the old guys say all the stuff we’ve been saying for months about the movie, only they voice it over the movie and it’s way more guy-ish. Highlights?
“That looks from the guy-you-alert-the-flight-attendent-about collection”
“Can’t socialize, obsessed with crappy book series!”

Seriously Twilight, the movie you make it too easy sometimes! I really can’t wait (no really?) for November, not only to see New Moon but because we’ll have some new material! Thank God!!

“Sit down have some plaid!”
Themoonisdown

So did you sing this to your boss this morning while through darts in your boss dartboard?

Seriously you CANNOT miss Letters to Rob today. UC’s hubby has a treat for all of us!!
Riff on Twilight in the forum
You have till Wednesday to enter the Imma Contest! Have you entered yet?

AmandDUH’s at it again – Decode!!

Dear LTT-ers, train wreck lovers and video enthusiasts,

Our dear dear Twimom video vixen AmanDUh is at it again! And yes she’s gone back to covering songs and wouldn’t you know this time it’s Decode by Paramore. I about jumped out of my chair when I got the notification she had updated and she doesn’t let us down!

Looks like AmanDUH’s invested in a make up artist for this video. Yup she got eyeliner and what I can only assume is a  tear drop “tattoo” on her cheek. Now where I’m from that means something quite different that being sad. Thats just straight gangsta! Did she get in a prison gang fight at the ladies penitentury and kill one of her homies? DAAAYUM Amanduh’s hardcore! I better watch my back, she’s libel to cuttabitch. But really, I’m just glad she brought back “special” Edward for this video, I was beginning to miss him and his hairline.

Enjoy! And uh don’t turn up the volume too loud she hits a few notes that only dogs will be able to hear.

How did we get herAH?
Themoonisdown

-UC dazzles us with some Rob goodness over at Letters to Rob
– create your own video and post it at the forum so we can all laugh!

Your laughs are directly proportional to your tears with these Monday Twilight Funnies

Dear LTT-ers,

Welcome back to hell after a nice long holiday weekend, at least for our fellow US friends, and for everyone else well, just welcome back. So are you like me and you have work piled up on your desk that you put off last week cause you were “busy with other projects?” When what really happened is you were in a Robert Pattinson fueled daze from OD-ing on all the pics and videos from the set of Remember Me and just couldn’t pull it together long enough to do that report or create that power point presentation for your super important meeting? Yea, me too. Well I’ve got the perfect compromise… need to look like you’re busy catching up, but really want to peruse the interwebs for what happened in the Rob/Twi world over the weekend? I present you with some Twilight themed graphs and diagrams courtesy of Graphjam.com. Keep these open in a separate tab while you check all the usual Twi site suspects this morning and when the boss walks by you can click back over here and he’ll think you’re hard at work with only the bottom line in mind when it’s really Rob’s bottom that’s on your mind (Hit it! remember that one?!).

people-hate-twilighgraph
Obviously this graph was made after they saw one of three things:
1. Attending (by mistake) a 100 Monkeys, Sam Bradley, or other random Twi-affiliated band’s concert (Canvas tote bags, Monkey hats, Goth Maria Von Trapp, anyone?!)
2. The Pattinson Pants lady in her natural habitat (a Twi-conference in line to meet Gil Birmingham)
3. Getting in the middle of a heated Team Edward vs Team Jacob debate after accidentally standing in the New Moon midnight showing line

cultfollowinggraph
I think some of us (especially the OG fans pre 2008) can testify to this one. The more popular the saga gets because of the movie the less they want to be apart of the fandom. The crazy stalkers, the cheapening of the storyline, the lame merchandise, the pop cultural saturation. We just have to keep our eyes on the prize and remember the reason we love Twilight is because of the story. Stay strong yall! Don’t let the CAS get ya down!

bookswith
We’ve all been there, trying to explain to your skeptical friend why Edward and the other vampires SPARKLE in the sunlight. But they’re vampires, they’re not supposed to go in the sun anyway! Ok, ok it’s a FANTASY just go with it!

Oh crap here comes your boss! Minimize MINIMIZE!!

Happy Monday!
Themoonisdown

See what UC’s up to over there with Rob
Commiserate with other folks in the daily chat thread over at the Forum!

She’s at it again! AmanDAH the TwiMom video vixen!

Dear LTT/LTR-ers,

Remember last weekend when I brought you my newest favorite fan video creator? Well she’s at it again and we’ve decided to give her a nickname because she’s too amazing NOT to have one. This lovely gal shall now be called AmandDAH the Twimom Video Vixen, cause yes, this woman is a mom! And she’s not only creating vids of her version of the New Moon trailer with her special hubster but is writing, singing and recording her own songs inspired by Twilight! Oh yes, hang on to your butts cause this is gonna blow that trailer out of the water!

Let’s start out with her upbeat diddy titled “My Vampire”

I keep worrying that her shirt may fall off through this whole video… makes it hard to concentrate on the amazing lyrics…

Starting over
in a new school forks high
eyes on me
dont like the attention

then i spot him out
staring me down
looking mean
looking pale and handsome

hes not a man hes a vampire

Alrighty now let’s slow it down with her next smash hit titled “Beautiful Vampire”

Now if I was the director of a Twilight porno spoof: Bella Does Forks, this is the song I would pick for the soundtrack…

pale white skin
ice cold chill
sheild of mine
vampire eyes
fast
blink of an eye

thirst of my wine

hes beautiful
beautiful vampire

Seriously guys, I really can’t wait to see what AmanDAH comes up with next cause I couldn’t write this stuff… she’s the biggest Twilight fan who’s never read Twilight!

Happy Saturday!
Themoonisdown

LTR
The Forum

Follow the cut for a very special announcement about the Porn-off between us and the Twi Sisterhood
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Taylor Lautner at a hockey game in 4 takes…

Dear Taylor-

I had a great weekend, saw some friends, went to some house parties, got a fathers day gift (don’t forget Big Daddy Lautner this Sunday!) and wondered what you were up to now that New Moon wrapped principle photography… and lucky me Just Jared found you at a Detroit Red Wings hockey game! I totally forgot you were from the North because who else watches hockey around here? You and Big Daddy Lautner (my other name for Poppa Filet o Fish) did not disappoint with your AMAZING facial expressions during that game that were all caught on film for folks like UC and I to enjoy… and enjoy them we did!

taylorhockey01
Taylor: OH DUDE DAD!! That cougar behind me just grabbed my balls in the hall and I liked it!!
Big Daddy: Isn’t that a Katy Perry song?
Taylor: Um Yea, something like that, I don’t know Dad but she pushed me into the guys bathroom and told me she’d “make me a man” for Rob’s phone number, can you believe it?! I was like get in line sister!
Big Daddy: Hmmmph… kids these days… freakin 6 pack abs and mystic tans are wasted on the youth… I wonder if they have a McDee’s in this arena. Taylor go get me a McFlurry!

taylorhockey03
Taylor: Daaaadd… I just remembered Selena broke up with me. I’m really sad… do you have a kleenex?
Big Daddy: Uh, I got this leftover napkin from Wendy’s, will that do?
Taylor: sniff… sniff… yeaaaa but who will I walk in the rain with now? What about the umbrella I bought? Who will I give chaste sweet hugs to on the sidewalk in front of the papparazzi?
Big Daddy: Consider it a blessing she dumped you now Son. She’s a Disney girl, it would have taken 2 years to get to first base and then it would have ended in sorrow after the inevitable dirty webcam pics surfaced. Do you want some cotton candy?

Follow the cut to see if Big Daddy tackles a Dippin Dots vender…
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