Breaking it down: Eclipse Trailer, sperm donation and the Notebook

Dear LTT-ers,

SURPRISE, we broke down the Eclipse trailer, I mean what else did you expect us to do? We finally got something new from Eclipse and had to share our joy and horror and excitement and totally wild ideas together!

If you haven’t seen it yet (what the crap have you been doing?!) Here it is…

0-:25ish
UC: okay… let’s DO THIS! we’ll watch 20ish seconds and then stop and talk about it…
Moon: dont give away stuff at the end! I haven’t seen it yet!
UC: i won’t okay ready?
Moon: yes
UC: go
Moon: OHHHH black summit logo, black like their hearts (i kid, i kid!)

Hmmm wanna go get a sammy and some ice cream? Maybe some chips and salsa?

Moon: ISABELLA?!
UC: isbella…..
Moon: OOOHHHH shes in trouble! That’s her full name!
UC: STOP the trailer!
Moon: OMG!!!
UC: stops at the voluri
Moon: the volturi show up right as we stop
Moon: so lets talk about the meadow
UC: so yes- um  did Rob eat like… 10,000 bags of cheetos?
Moon: lemme watch again
UC: or did they have the dry humpy time and his shirt is all frumpled cuz he looks huge
Moon: he’s all rumpled from laying around in the meadow
UC: haha his belly! seriously it’s like.. sticking out like he is bloated
Moon: he doesnt even care anymore
UC: he’s got the girl, eaten a couple extra deer
Moon: he’s like letting it all go
UC: she looks curvy. and good
Moon: letting it all go like a real relationship
UC: they’re all.. swollen… like.. they had some major humpage in the meadow
Moon: they’re going to brunch a lot, reading newspapers, eating fattening foods cause they’re so in love…

One Vampire to rule them all, One Vampire to find them, One Vampire to bring them all and in the darkness bind them

UC: Let’s move on
Moon: to the elvin lords?
Moon: the volturi look like they’re in middle earth, surprised jane didnt speak in elvish to them

Follow the jump to break it ALL down and maybe think about your contraception plan

Last minute Twilight Halloween Costume Ideas

Dear LTT-ers,

It’s Halloween today! Did you forget like me and need a costume for that party you’re going to? Do you want to pay tribute to your love of Twilight in a subtle, non-fangirl, non bouffant and bella’s jacket sorta way? Well have no fear we’ve come up with some last minute costume ideas for the Twilight/LTT gal (and maybe their unsuspecting boy).

Forks police officer
All you need is a stick on mustache, a can of Vitamin R and grab that Sheriff badge from your kids toy box. Instant Charlie Swan! Bonus points: bring your friends: Waylon Forge, Billy Black and Harry Clearwater. Extra bonus points for a bag of fish fry and lugging your flat screen TV around

Fake Lesbians
This is a costume where you’ll need a close gal pal who is in on the Twilight gossip.  Wear big nikes and tight denim. Sport a very surly attitude. Chair smoke ALL night. Never leave each other the entire night. Hold hands. Kiss if the mood is right. Bonus: bring along a third wheel boyfriend (feel free to call him an Italian spice), walk in holding hands as a threesome. Don’t pay attention to him all night.

100 monkeys
Wearing the bananagers banana costume, sneak into a zoo after it closed but right before the party. Find the monkey/chimp/gorilla cages. Let them all loose, befriend them, invite them to the party. Load them in your car and take them to the party. Give the primates instruments and play bad music all night. Write impromptu songs about Halloween candy and trick or treating or how much you love the girls on “slut-lo-ween.”

Want some more last minute costume ideas? Follow the cut!

Billy Burke Appreciation Day!

I want YOU to appreciate ME!

Dear Billy,

Your fans have spoken!

I took to the twitter-webs (one of your favorite places) to ask our lovely followers who we should appreciate this Sunday and we got the message loud and clear. They wanted to appreciate YOU, Billy Burke! Can we blame them really? You are the man who plays Bella’s pops Charlie AND you were Jack on My Boys, one of our personal faves. There really is too much to appreciate here but how about we give it a whirl this Sunday…

We appreciate:

Your Tweeting skills

What other celeb uses Twitter to call out journalists, lame-o tweeters and to just plain #drunktweet? You, that’s who! Never let your agent/manager cramp your twitter style! Keep on tweeting country songs and bitching out dumb folks who @reply you and we’ll keep following!

Your Copstache

I’m gonna have to let the other girls wax poetic about your stache because I, like Bella, grew up with a dad who rocked a stache so I in no way think it’s sexy but apparently the other ladies about these think your copstache is the best thing since sliced bread and I’m gonna let them talk about it in the comments, but just know your stache is one of the best “props” Charlie has and might just give a bunch of gals naughty thoughts.
c
c
Your gun cleaning, Vitamin R and lil Halo-

I can’t lie you had some of the best lines and actions in Twilight. But we all know the humans rocked Twilight the hardest. But how you play Charlie is so spot-on… in fact dare I say your version of Charlie might even be better than Stephenie’s version of Charlie. SHHH!!! Don’t tell!

Follow the cut to see what else we appreciate about Billy and add your favorite things