Cashing in on the Twilight/New Moon connection for a “good cause?”

Dear Twilight cast members-

Good on you guys for lending your celebrity to a good cause! It you’re going to be chased around by paparazzi and idolized by folks all over the world you might as well give a voice to a great cause. And you are! Witness the latest in go gooders…

Angie got back!

Dear Christian,

What a classy homage to the horror that is the fur trade industry while gently alluring to the fact that you’re in Twilight. The forest, the mist, the Twilight font and what else says vampire and dead furry animals than blood splatters all over the PETA ad?

Too bad you play a human.

XO
Moon

PS nice booty lady!
c
c
c
c

Doin' it for the kids!

Dear Kristen,

You make it harder and harder for me to keep up this facade of not liking you when you go and make an appearance at the Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation walk during the middle of a busy press tour for New Moon when you could have been taking a nap or eating cheetos.

Can you break out the mullet or act surly again, please?

XO
Moon

Follow the jump to see Taylor work it for a good cause…

How to be a fun celebrity

We're not fooled by your attempt at fun. Whistling does not count

Dear Twilight cast members who are absolutely no fun (read: Kristen Stewart & Robert Pattinson),

What’s your problem? Can’t you have a little fun? Sure it’s annoying having people run after you so you can sign a book that you had absolutely no part in writing. And some fans (read: most fans) are absolutely crazy, but it’s your life. And it’s not going away. So why not laugh about it? Otherwise, you’re just going to be running away for forever. And while all that running may produce a kick-ass gluteus maximus, who needs tight buns when you’re just hiding away in a dark hotel room all day long? (if you’re doing something with those tight buns in the dark hotel room, that’s a different story…)

If you want to trade positions, I’m willing. (positions in life- I’m no longer talking about tight buns) I’d be such a fun celebrity.. like Fach- Peter Facinelli. That dude knows how to be a celebrity the right way. He joined twitter, started tweeting back & forth with fans and before you knew it, some dude he knows is in a bikini on the street in Hollywood! Peter’s a good time!

I’ve put together a list of ideas on how to be a fun celebrity. Take my advice & your life will be so much more joy-filled, less stressful and you’ll be able to show off that gluteus maximus in public, instead of hiding away in a hotel room.

• 

  Kellan, do you think that photographer would sign my book?

  When you’re running away from the paparazzi and you jump into a cab, kiss the cabbie.

• Tired of people thinking you’re with so-and-so just because you were seen together near the used lingerie section of VanCity’s finest thrift store? Hold hands with your bodyguard. And skip. (if you’re feeling extra funny, slip your new, used panties over the bodyguard’s head)
• Carry around a Twilight book and have one of your cast members sign it right in front of the paps. OR ask the paps to sign it.
• Stop fearing the paps- LOVE on them. Carry around a notebook & write little messages for them. “I like it when you call me Big Papa” (tell Big Daddy Lautner about that- he’ll get a kick out of it) or ‘Breaking News! I’m a hermaphrodite” or something simple like “I love the paps.” If you’re not feeling up to risking ending up as the latest freak mentioned in the National Enquirer, write about a charity- “fightpovery.org”
• Get an official twitter. You wouldn’t even have to tweet often. People would still write you every day and wait for you to say “Damn that steak was good” or “My dirty hair is starting to itch” (psst there is even a setting where you can turn OFF replies from people you don’t follow! Protection from the fangirls!) Plus you could tweet lies like “Headed to 100 monkeys tonight- Man i Love them!” and instead run back to that thrift store because you forgot to pick up matching flannel pajama pants.
• Drunk Tweet. Billy Black Burke (that was not an intentional mistake) does it the best:
  

  Just sitting here in my hotel room with uncomfortable images of PFach and Lutz together in a tandem lotus position. mmmm, dreamy.

  What the…?



I love little boys, and Twitpic

• Once you have a twitter, get yourself a Twitpic account. Photoshop yourself with a mustache. Or photoshop your co-stars with a mustache. Upload the pictures.
• Be touchy-feely with fangirls. Well, the hot ones anyway. I happen to think Kellan should be a lil more choosy with the fans he loves on. Pick the hottest ones (we do exist), get a lil smooch and maybe, if you’re feeling dangerous, even a lil’ more. Or kiss your co-stars who don’t get enough attention. Have you SEEN Christian Serratos lately? Dang…..
• Put it out there on Craigslist like this guy. Don’t be ashamed if you have a strong want for a gorgeous Asian boy. And even if you don’t want a gorgeous Asian boy, pretend that you do. Cause you know that some pap will reply to the ad and set-up a date with you so they can catch you and sell the story. But the joke will be on them. Dress up like a vampire (I hear you may know somewhere you can swipe some clothes & make-up), set up some candles & romantic music, get your video camera ready with a live feed to your tinychat for twitter and open the door and say “Mama taught me how to make you ‘meow’ ” The pap might not get  it, but we all will.

Stop being a sourpuss couple. Be FUN celebrities! Learn from Fach, Kellan, TayTay and whoever is 26 and looking for a lil’ gaysian lovin’ to pass the time!

Happy to help!
UnintendedChoice

Who are your fav fun Twi-lebrities?

Discuss who wants a gaysian lover on The Forum
See if Rob did anything funny over on LTR

Pic Source and Thanks to Fatima for mustache-Kristen!)

Our top ten favorite moments in Twilight, the movie

Dear LTT/LTR-ers and Twihards, lovers and haters of this site,

Today is another big day in the life of us here at LTT. Yes, you might have guessed it but today marks our TEN MONTH anniversary. Now not to get all high school relationship on you but we think blogging solid for ten months is a big deal. Countless hours, love, conversations, text messages, good ideas, really bad ideas (trust me, there are tons), blood sweat and tears have gone into these ten months so UC and I want to celebrate this week. In honor of our ten month anniversary we are going to be bringing you a new top ten list every day this week to celebrate and look towards the next ten!

So to kick off our top tens I’m gonna start us off with Top Ten Favorite Twilight Movie Moments! All the little things, the good and the sometimes cheesy things that we loved and couldn’t imagine living without. All the moments that we wanted to see make it in, the ones we didn’t know and the ones that made us fall in love with the story all over again… here they are

10. The Cullen’s enter the Cafeteria

The set up for the whole movie: who are those kids and why are they different and most importantly WHO IS THAT BOY? Why yes, it’s only the hottest boy to ever grace the United States public school system, that’s who. And he just happens to be a Vampire. Ok wait, she’ll learn that later… let’s not get ahead of ourselves now!

09. Animal Attack

Oh Carlisle you kill us with the delivery of that line coupled with the totally obvious stare down you give Edward. Yup, it was totally an animal that killed Buttcrack Santa and not some crazy psycho nomadic vampire that’s going to develop some weirdo fascination with Bella and stop at nothing to kill her. Yup, totes an animal.

Wanna find out what else made our top ten list of favorite Twilight Movie Moments? Follow the cut…

Happy Labor Day from the hot Twilight cast

Dear LTTers in countries other than the US,

Today is Labor Day in the United States. That means instead of working we’ll be stuffing ourselves with hot dogs and throwing up on volleyball courts. (Yes, just like Memorial Day and July 4th– we’re not very creative). For LTT and Moon & I, this means we let other people do the work for us (you may have noticed a trend all weekend long…… we started the celebration early!)

Again, the gals in Rob’s Flat daily chat in The Forum have given us the goods with a whole other slew of Twi-cast Porn:

Daaaanngggg ladies!

Happy Labor Day from your lazy friends UC & Moon! We’ll be back in full force tomorrow! Promise!

Love,
UnintendedChoice

Talk about your volleyball score on The Forum
See who did our work for us over on LTR

Twilight has the hottest cast

Dear very understanding LTTers,

You know when you have one of those nights as a vampire blogger when you know you’re going to have a late night dinner with friends, so you prepare ahead and draft up a quick idea of a great “Twilosophy” for the next morning, send a quick e-mail off to a group of vampire experts to consult for ideas & funny one-liners for the post you’ll work on when you come back from the late night dinner, no matter what time of night it is? Have you been there? Did you also forget to consider the amount of wine you’d consume at said late night dinner?

What does one do in this case when you get home after consuming 7 bottles of wine between 6 friends in 3 hours and the draft you so wonderfully started writing before you left for the dinner apparently isn’t as great as you’d hoped and only contains 3 run-on sentences and a rant about Rob Pattinson needing to come out of hiding?

Panic. That’s what you do.

Until you remember that you saved a very special post for the very special day when you would make a very special move and dance in the kitchen of your friend’s home to Lady Gaga while singing into an empty bottle of wine while being swung around by your friend Ryan who is declaring, not so subtly, “UC- can you see the Unicorns? [he means real unicorns] Do you want to ride a unicorn!? Rob Pattison has the head of a unicorn. Look- it’s Rob Pattison with a unicorn head. And he is biting pillows.” [True story. All of it.] To all of you girls in the Rob’s Flat Chat over on The Forum, you saved my ass with your amazing Twi-Cast Porn.

Twilight has the hottest cast, and you girls made them so much hotter!

Enjoy these while I enjoy my hangover,
UnintendedChoice

Many More after the jump!

The tassle’s worth the hassle! Twilight stars graduate

Seniors Rule, underclassmen drool! FORKS SENIORS YALL!!!

Dear Graduating Vampires, Humans and I’m sure some of the Werewolves,

We break for the weekend and you all decide to go and graduate on us. I’m a little disappointed I didn’t receive an invitation to commencement but I’ll just assume mine is lost in the mail and head over to Hallmark asap to get you all a bunch of shiz that says “Class of 2009” that you will eventually find 5 years later when you’re cleaning out our old bedroom at your parents house. Return it NOW for cash. Trust me.

Seeing the caps and gowns and fake diplomas got me thinking about when I graduated and how I loved those cheesy quotes that people used in their commencement speeches, on graduation announcements, and as the class motto so I got to thinking about which quote you guys would choose for your graduation. And here’s what I came up with…

Bella Swan - biggest tease

Mike Newton
What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us  (burritos).  ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Bella Swan
Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did….  (so TURN me already, Edward!! GEEZ!!) ~Attributed to Mark Twain, unconfirmed

Angela Weber
Wherever you go, no matter what the weather, always bring your own sunshine. (Cause it always freaking rains in freaking Forks, Washington)  ~Anthony J. D’Angelo, The College Blue Book

Best lines in a movie about vampires and hottest body when not playing a nerd

Eric Yorkie
Excellence is not a skill.  It is an attitude  (So CHILLAX!). ~Ralph Marston

Edward Cullen
The important thing is not to stop questioning (But I hope you enjoy disappointment). ~Albert Einstein

Alice Cullen
If you think education is expensive, try ignorance! Manolo Blahniks ~Andy McIntyre

(I know, I know they didn’t graduate the same year, but just go with it…)

Forks class of 09

Rosalie Hale
Education is the best provision for old age. (So it becoming an Vampire)  ~Aristotle

Jasper Hale
There is a good reason they call these ceremonies ‘commencement exercises’. Graduation is not the end, it’s the beginning (trust me, I’ve done this like 50 times) – Orrin Hatch

Emmett Cullen
Do not follow where the path may lead.  Go, instead, where there is no path and leave a trail (but hopefully no scent for any murderous nomadic vampires).  ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Happy Graduation!

Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world (so is blogging about Vampires),
Themoonisdown

UC brings the awesome over at Letters to Rob
Sign Edwards yearbook in the forum!

Twilight Twitterers

Dear Twitter,

Twilight has taken over your world. Seriously. I’m a social networking whore and have had Twitter since the beginning of Twitter-time when it sucked and was wayyy boring, so seeing it BLOW UP in the last year has been insane. And I think it has a lot to do with the Twilight saga. Even when we first started tweeting for our blogs (Letter2Twilight) it was kinda boring. We’d tweet about a new post, check out tweets from other blogs & media sites we follow and occasionally have some interaction with a follower, but now? Full-blown conversations are had on Twitter (yeah, you thought having a 140 character limitation would prevent that!) People spend hours upon hours in the twitterverse- and trends can be manipulated and are… often. (FYI- it was not a natural occurrence that SamBradley became a trending topic!)

You can thank (or blame) the Twilight world for this.  I bet, in a months time, we see 5 Twilight-related words as ‘trends.’ The Twilight fanbase is p-o-w-e-r-f-u-l.

And now, almost the whole Twilight cast is on Twitter.  I love when celebs tweet because it makes them more “real,” and kinda approachable (even though most probably turn off the option of reading the @replies from people they don’t follow) I was perusing the twitter accounts of the cast, and I realized you can learn a lot about people based on what they tweet. Stuff like: Jamie Campbell Bower is on vaca, has a blackberry and clearly drunk tweets. And Anna Kendrick is apparently not only very new to Twitter, but also to the world wide web, because she tweeted that she just found out that Bon Iver was going to be on the New Moon soundtrack- old news! and Justin Chon I don’t really get. Last I checked he was an actor who has had some small roles here in there, but- is he famouser than I realize?  The kid goes EVERYWHERE- Some days it’s “In Hawaii.” Then “In Paris.” “In London” etc. etc. etc. Traveling like that costs a lot of money, and last I checked small roles pay shockingly little!

Billy Burke slays me. I dunno what the freak he’s talking about most of the time:

Went AWOL again for a couple days. Got lost in the woods and made really good friends with some toothless banjo players. Don’t worry…

my virginity is still in tact.

I wonder how long it will take for it to come out that RPatz and I are dating. Apparently I’m completely captivated by him.

hmm, i see the burning question is already up on the Lexicon. the little hairy monster does indeed have a life of its own. and yes its REAL

Seriously, read his tweets- he’s hilarious and I can only assume quite often drunk tweeting. Love that his publicist clearly has bigger clients that he/she’s worried about and hasn’t noticed yet that Billy sometimes says stuff any PR person would freak out about.

So I’m just writing to say ‘you’re welcome’ on behalf of all Twilight fans. I’ve checked- and I’m not sure there is another “fandom” that uses Twitter the way the Twilight world does. We’re so happy to help you by using your free app while you sit in an office with your millions in venture capitalist money and try to figure out how to make a profit!

You’re welcome,
UnintendedChoice

Do you ‘tweet?’ Do you feel like following celebs makes them seem more ‘real?’ Who else do you follow besides Twi people? And seriously- have YOU seen other ‘fandom’ groups on Twitter to the extend the Twi-world is!?

All the Twilight twitterers after the jump

Storytime with Moon – Comic Con in review

Dear LTT-ers

As you all know Thursday I was able to attend the 2nd coming of Jesus, aka the New Moon panel at Comic Con and I have a little (ok, it’s quite long) story to share with you! So that means it’s story time with Moon!

Sit back relax grab your poison of choice (mine’s a diet coke as the CC folks learned) and let’s get to it!

XO
Moon

Once the news came out that there would in fact be a New Moon panel and presentation at Comic Con the California LTT/LTR gals KNEW we had to be there, come hell or high water. And trust, there was a lot of hell and a lot of high water. But finally tickets were secured and plans made for several groups of Cali gals to converge on Comic Con last Thursday…

Making up part of the LA/OC group Chelsea and I headed down to San Diego Wednesday afternoon to meet up with our SD gals to plot, plan and scheme how we would make this happen. By Wednesday morning there were already reports of 100-ish Twihards in line and by the time we reached San Diego that evening a reported 500 were now in line. So we jumped in the car with VickyB and headed down to scope out our competition…

The sign pointed us towards heaven on earth

An impromptu little tent city of Twihards set up on the outside of Hall H. Since we knew there was no point in waiting in line over night at this point and in all honesty we didn’t want to (we just wanted to be in the room not in the front row), we honked and continued on in search of food and good times

Since we were going to be seeing Rob the next day we first stopped off to get some slutty outfits for our Comic Con Preparedness Kits. No Cullen crest or Team Jacob shirts for us. It was hooker lucite heels, cootchie cutter shorts and whips that we were looking for!

Let me tell you the rest of the story… after the cut!

Where are you Nikki Reed?

Have you seen this girl?

Dear Nikki,

Monday when I was writing that post about Drunk emailing and how much would it cost to get a Twi star at your party, I was reviewing the list and kept wondering who I left out and then it dawned on me: I left out YOU! And so that’s why I wrote “Nikki – WHO?” Cause seriously girl where the h-word are you?! I’m kind of actually doing a Mom Moon and worrying about you and where you’ve been and how you’re doing. If I wanted to pull a real Mom Moon I’d start calling the LAPD, and area LA Hospitals to see if you’ve turned up. Cause it’s July 14th at 5am in Los Angeles, “Do you know where your Nikki Reed is?” Cause I sure as crap don’t.

So of course it got me thinking… where in the world could you be? And what are you doing? I checked IMDB and the only thing you have current is in pre-pro and that’s K-11 and we KNOW that ain’t filming right now and it might even be up in the air if you’re even still in it, especially if that whole KStew falling out rumor is true.

So then I checked to see if you have any fansites cause if anyone knows what’s up with Twi stars it’s their fans! Can I get an amen? And I find out no one’s updated in about a week. That isn’t good news. Then I hit Twitter, cause that’s all the latest and greatest and guess what all (read 2) fan twitters hadn’t updated in days either. Not even your FAKE twitter counterpart has cared enough to tweet about your fake goings on in over a week!

Accidental gang member or Nike enthusiast??

So it’s left me only a couple options as to where you’ve been…

• You were driving to LAX one day, took and wrong turn and got lost in south central LA and were jumped into one of the local gangs… crips or bloods? I’d say crips cause you look better in blue than red. If this is true call us maybe we can initiate a trade off with the crips. You for Justin Chon or maybe they want someone beefier like Christian Serratos?

• You’ve become a hermit spending all your time online at Nike.com designing more ridiculous neon high top sneakers than you know what to do with. My advice? Trash them all and get a nice pair of ballet flats.

• This whole Oregano thing is true and you’ve chosen him over KStew. WOW if that’s true I really want the dish! Give me the gossip now! And so you two are hanging out at Cathy’s house, smoking up and worming your way into whatever movie she’s doing next. I wish I knew Cathy, I’d love to be an actress.

Take the cut to find out what Nikki’s REALLY been up to. TRUST it’s SOOO good!

New Moon premiering in Knoxville, TN

Dear City of Knoxville, TN,

Are you ready? Do you think you can handle the swarm of girls that will be lining up at your doors weeks in advance? Are your Motel 6’s all paid up on their electric bills so they can Keep the lights on for everyone rolling into town? Do you even have any idea what the hell I’m talking about? Oh. Let me start over. Apparently New Moon is premiering in your town. Are you prepared?

I know the article only mentions the movie showing early for a charity event, but already plans are set in motion. Blogs have commented on how odd the choice of Knoxville is (no offense) over Los Angeles but have praised the cast for going somewhere a little less flashy. Airline’s customer service lines have been busy all week with Twihards trying to change their November flights from LAX to, uh, KNOX (?), fighting with the customer service rep over the $200 change flight fee but deciding in the end that “it’s worth it” to see Robert Pattinson, up close and personal, in the deep south.

I, for one, understand completely why the execs at Summit decided to whisk the cast from sunny LA to the Redneck Riviera. Knoxville offers the cast the following advantages for their site seeing tour: Mullets, Wife Beaters, Bluegrass, RC Colas and Moon Pies, Lee Press-On Nails, Fanny Packs, and Chevy Pick-up Trucks with gun racks and rebel flag bumper stickers, versus the following disadvantages of what is sure to be seen in LA: Hipster man bangs, flannel or plaid pearl snap shirts, dj’s who mash up pop music and oldies, vegan food, minx, murses & Toyota Prius’. Are you prepared with Knoxville’s finest rednecks to greet ‘dem fellers from dat der big ocean in da west?

Note to Solomon: reliving the 'best moment of your life' (pic with Kstew) will not be happening again this year

On second thought, how well are your Wal-Mart’s stocked with tissues? Because when the news breaks that the premiere isn’t actually in Knoxville but the movie is just showing a few days early to raise a lot of money for a good cause, the devastating cries from Twihards in their New Moon t-shirts, Pattinson pants & Wolfpack tiny backpacks will be heard from downtown Knoxville all the way to Paris, Texas. Heck, once everyone finds out that instead of their beloved Edward, Bella & Jacob, Summit sent Gill Birmingham, Christian Serratos & a random wolf to represent the event, I wouldn’t even be surprised if there’s a riot amongst the city of tents painted with murals of shirtless Edward.  I bet that once a bus rolls up in front of the theatre the rioters will calm for a moment thinking that Sam Bradley has come to serenade the crowd with soulful tunes, but when they find out it’s just Solomon Trimble on the greyhound crashing the show, the riots will begin again. Are you prepared?

Perhaps you should reissue a statement in your newspaper clarifying that when you say “Although confirmation of the Knoxville premiere of the movie is set” you actually mean a Knoxville premiere (aka first time showing in Knoxville) and not the New Moon premiere that is being whispered all over the web.  That way, you can save your police force the trouble of calming down the riots that are sure to begin when Solomon Trimble shows up as the “star” for the event. You don’t want your city experiencing the 2nd-hand embarrassment of Twihard-girl-on-twihard-girl mud wrestling, winner being the one who gets to ask Solomon to autograph her left breast, if you don’t have to.

Bring home some moonpies for me,
UnintendedChoice

PS: before you southerners call me a “damn yank” and get mad at my poking fun of Knoxville, all those references came from EastFriend, who is a southern girl born & raised. Get mad at her. Just don’t tell her you love UT. Then she’ll be mad at you.

Did you see this posted places and think people were silly for assuming that the actual premiere would be moved to Knoxville like we did?

The Forum is a great place to discuss football rivalries
LTR is a great place to discuss Rob. Actually, anywhere is a great place to discuss Rob, sigh…