Open Weekend Post: My new, much funnier than me, bff

Dear Saturdayers,

I just made up a word and put “Dear” in front of it so I could turn what would normally be just a regular ol’ blog post into a “letter,” thus fitting in with the theme of our site. See that? Pretty brilliant, huh? Blogging 101, y’all!

This past week I fell in love. In love with a Chinese guy named Vince Mancini. He makes fun of Twilight and puts Moon & I to shame. I love those people. Not only do they reassure me that it is, indeed, normal to poke fun of Twilight because that’s what “outsiders” are doing, but they make me feel so bad at my attempts to be funny that it forces me to be better. After I almost quit the blog out of depression, and after I email such a writer offering them my spot on the blog (“the pay sucks, but the people are nice,” I tell them), I get over it and move on. Until the next funny guy comes along. Anyway, I found Vince this week. And fell in love.

Just read what he had to say about Bill Condon being brought on to direct Breaking Dawn. Oh, and the picture is the one he posted on his blog. Yes. An outsider saw that. Vince writes:

(It's one thing for US to see pictures like these, but to know that people OUTSIDE of the fandom do too!? Shudder..)

“If you watched Kinsey or Dreamgirls or Gods and Monster (for which Bill Condon won an Oscar for best adapted screenplay), you probably thought, “Gee, that’s great, but where are the snorkeling vampires, the c-sections, the wolf-on-baby love affairs?” Well you’re in luck, because Summit has officially announced that Condon will direct the final chapter in the Twilight Saga, Breaking Dawn, as translated from Stephenie Meyer’s original elementary schoolese.

Yes, it takes a certain grace and a subtle sensitivity (as opposed to my own brand of overbearing, ostentatious sensitivity) to bring to the big screen a book with such plot points as:

The baby has telepathy, by the way, so everybody can read its thoughts while it’s in the womb, and it turns out to have an essentially adult mind. …In a moment that demands to be shown on the silver screen, Edward gives Bella an emergency C-section with his teeth.

So basically, an Academy Award winner is directing the sparkly vampire version of Little Man. How could that not be awesome? I can’t wait to see how Kristen Stewart decides to play the scene in which her unborn vampire baby severs her spine. Ten bucks says she plays it like really bad heartburn. She’s such a subtly sensitive actress.”

SO FUNNY, right!? (I know, right!?) That’s not even all of it. Read the entire thing here

Then, In a post about how Kellan Lutz & friends will be joining the rest of the cast for Breaking Dawn, the man I hope to make my new best friend says:

“Bite open my C-section scar, Press Release:

Summit Entertainment has confirmed that Peter Facinelli, Ashley Greene, Kellan Lutz, Jackson Rathbone, Elizabeth Reaser, and Nikki Reed will all return as members of the Cullen Family in The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn. These cast members join Billy Burke as Charlie Swan.

Oh God, joining Billy Burke as Charlie Swan would be a dream come true. There are perhaps no sweeter words in the English language than “join Billy Burke as Charlie Swan.” My entire childhood I sat in class daydreaming about the day when the arena would go dark, the spotlights would come on, my entrance music would start to play, and announcer would shout, NOW JOINING BILLY BURKE AS CHARLIE SWAN… I’d run out, the crowd would go wild. I was the best they ever saw. Gay Vampire Scarf Baseball would never be the same.”

Seriously read this whole thing & leave him some comment love (preferably asking him to be my bff)

So hilarious.
Looking for more to waste your time with this Saturday? Check out his post about Dakota Fanning and of COURSE you must read the one about Robsten!

Happy Saturday! I’m off to the shore- which just means the “beach,” but Philadelphians & Jersey people don’t call it that. I’ve lived here for 27 years and I still don’t get it!

Love,
UnintendedChoice

PS: The most amazing part of this entire letter is that after I wrote it I went to find my new bff Vince’s twitter account and noticed he no longer looked Asian. So I did some more research (aka read his about page fully) and realized that the Asian guy in the picture + the fact that he used to be a Chinese food chef does NOT necessarily mean that Vince is Chinese. IN fact, the guy next to the Asian guy on the about us page is NOT Michael Cera, as I first thought, and seems to actually be Vince. Oops. Let’s blame it on the 12:38 am message on the clock. Or the 1 glass of wine I had at 5:30 pm. Yeah…

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTR, The Forum, Twitter

It’s Casual Friday on LTT & we have some contest winners!

Dear LTTers,

Fridays are some of my favorite days around the blogs because it’s like we play “Casual Fridays.” We take off our tweed, put on our jeans & baseball cap and stop being so serious (ha!). No one wants to work. Everyone wants to play. And it’s no different around here. So let’s not waste any time and just JUMP into announcing our WINNER of the Contest we’ve been running all week to win a Tshirt of your choice from our brand spankin’ new LTT-LTR merch store!

And the winner is..

Cathy A with her Kristen Stewart: They’re Not Bears entry!

In 20 years, KStew may have escaped the mullet but not the fandom of Bella Blinking Swan. She finally relents and embraces the Bella Swan persona fully (name change included) .Now a blonde and with dual identity, Bella Kristen Swan Stewart received a degree in Zoology and makes it her lifetime goal to inform every man and woman on Earth that THEY’RE NOT BEARS!! with a bucket of fierce of course.

Congratulations Cathy! We hope you picked out the design you want on your tshirt! You’re going to be the HOTTEST gal around!

Runners Up

We had a hard time choosing between the one that ultimately won and Cathy’s 2nd entry:

In 2o years Rpattz will be the DILF OF THE CENTURY. Here he is on a father and son bonding trip to the local Goodwill. Notice he enters through the front since he has (UNFORTUNATELY) retired from his backdoor dumpster days..hence Rpattz junior’s existence *ahem*

This one is OH so Amazing! (and probably OH SO going to get us in trouble for posting it after we found out we will be interviewing Stephenie about this very book!) via whiplashes:

Bree Tanner in 20 years

Fangbanger & Moonjenn worked together to give us this look at Angela in 20 years. I think they might be on to something here…

Thanks to all the Runners Up! It was a hard decision! And congratulations Cathy! We will be emailing you today so watch for that!

Honorable Mentions after the jump! Continue reading

Twilight Moments that have shaped us (Oh, we’re interviewing Stephenie Meyer)

Dear LTTers,

There are those moments in life that shape you- Graduations, Weddings at young ages, anniversaries, pregnancies by vampire husbands, beautiful children’s births, children biting their way out of your womb, Children moving out of the house, your ex boyfriend falling in love with your newborn child…Moments that are Epic– Getting our first commenter on LTT was one like that. To this day we still refer to Christa as our “Fanbase” & our #1 fan. Then there was the time when Sam Bradley commented on a post where we made fun of him. That was before we realized that wasn’t a big deal and could draw his moles from memory.

Big day!

Then there was the first day we suddenly had over 200 readers on the blogs. And then we met you. And you. and you. Then Stephenie said she READ US which we’re still questioning and sometimes fear that her mentioning “LTT” really meant “Linux Trace Toolkit” and her bro & webmaster, inspiration for small wolf, Seth, just threw it in there to make a dorky computer joke (Linux is something the geeky cousin tried to get me to understand once)

Then there was RobstenGate in August, seeing Rob on Ellen in November and that moment during karaoke night when I visited Moon in LA last fall and everyone was singing “We are The Rob” and I just FELT it. What’s “it?” I don’t know- you just know it when you feel it. Those moments shaped us.

And then stuff like this happens and we question once again if Seth, the inspiration for the small werewolf, is taking his anger out at his sister for naming the weakest werewolf after him (But Seth, he does get some one-on-one with Bella & saves her life!! (Ugh.. I think… Note to self- re-read Eclipse before meeting Stephenie)) and punks us YET again & makes it all up. But it looks like the little hat spoke. And shit just got real because I just programmed “Interview Stephenie Meyer in an undisclosed location” into my calendar.

Hey guys,

I want to do something different with publicity for this movie release. For Twilight, I did the normal press junket, for New Moon I got to go on Oprah. Both of these were fun, exciting experiences. However, they both had the same drawback—the interviews were designed for a very broad audience, and because of that, most of the questions were about things you guys have known the answers to for years. I feel like all of the basic questions have been answered, and for Eclipse I want to focus on the more specific questions of the readers. To accomplish that, I’m hosting my own mini-junket with a few fansites. It will be held on Friday, June 18th, the week before the L.A. premiere.

Unfortunately, I can’t talk to every single site, and I want to keep this as low key and enjoyable as possible. So I put all the U.S. fansites in a hat (for logistical reasons, we had to keep this in the country) and drew out four names.

The names I drew were:

* Twilight Series Theories (twilightseriestheories.com)
* Twilight Source (twilightsource.com)
* Twifans (www.twifans.com)
* Letters To Twilight (letterstotwilight.wordpress.com) <——HOLY CRAP THAT’S US!!!!!!!!!

Each of these sites is invited to send two members of their staff (or one member and a guest) to our fan-centric mini-junket. You will be contacted shortly by my assistant, who will give you all the specific information. In the event that any of the sites is unable to send representatives, I’ve already drawn four back up sites, which I will post if it becomes necessary.

I’ll answer all of your questions (and your readers questions, if you want to poll them) about the Eclipse Movie, and the Bree story, as well, which will have been out for a few weeks by then. We’ll have lunch, hang out, and hopefully have a fantastic time. I hope you all can make it!

-Steph

WHATTTTTT? Are you SURE!? And have you really read our site? We’re not your “What happens when Bella gets her period” kinda question askers (oh wait- we ask that all the time. Should we push her for the REAL answer “I didn’t think about that one- give me a break” since none of us believe that “the blood is dead” crap? ) And Steph we’ve joked from time to time that you have a thing for Edward and therefore for Rob (but then again- who are we to talk? We run a Rob site) so are you sure…We get to meet YOU?

To repeat the majority of the conversations Moon & I had over chat yesterday afternoon:

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After the jump. Read some of the MANY responses we’ve received since yesterday: Continue reading

Monday Funnies: Twilight, In 20 Years… and the LTT/LTR Store

Dear LTT-ers,

It’s a Monday and you might be on your 3rd cup of coffee looking to wake up and shake off the tireds. But you can’t, I know. In fact you’re probably looking pretty haggard when you catch your glimpse in the reflection of the coffee pot in the break room and wondered, ‘when the crap did I age 20 years?’ You’re definitely not eternally 17. So I was thinking if normal people feel this way than the twi folks have to have a few haggard days themselves. Since we could all use a pick-me-up and helped out with the site In 20 Years that Brooke sent me, I present you some of our Twilight folks… IN TWENTY YEARS!

First up we have Rob…

Hmmm… they usually say men get better with age… but it appears as though Rob’s eyebrows have just grown with age. And he may just have a drooling problem…


Daaamn and we thought present day Kristen was a hardass… look at what 20 years and some smokes will do to you… Joan Jett, midlife crisis movie here she comes!

Then it was Taylor’s turn and a funny thing happened…
I put this picture in, but kept getting this back
Looks like the apple (or the double bacon cheese burger) doesn’t fall far from the tree…

Follow the cut to see an extra special treat AAANNNDDD an extra special announcement. Spoiler alert it may involve tshirts

Continue reading

Twilight Unicorns, Dads & gynecologists

Hardcore Twilight Lover

Dear people who aren’t as excited as I am that it’s Friday but who are probably still pretty excited,

Did you catch how I mentioned on last weekend’s Open Post that one day while in Mexico I was relaxing by myself in a chair in the pool & I looked to my left and saw a woman, who I swear had a tattoo that looked vaguely familiar- (red flowing ribbon? I didn’t want to stare too hard but I considered pretending to take a picture of the iguana hanging out a few feet beyond her), whose husband settled in a chair next to her and whipped out a Twilight book- just like that. In public. Dude. I don’t even think I’d do that anymore. Cause if I did, guarantee someone sees it who’s a non-normal Twihard and wants to talk stuff that normally makes my pulse race, but not on VACATION. While other PEOPLE are around! Or she’d be sorta a fan, and in conversation with her I’d say something that makes it OBVIOUS I know way too much about this stuff…. Either way- lose, lose. No Twilight books in public for me! So it was a shocker to see this Unicorn be so open about it! I really wanted to ask him some questions. I almost got up the nerve to ask him for a picture. Dammit- I should have interviewed him. I was on my 3rd Caprina drink & it was 11 am.. what was WRONG with me!?

Anyway, seeing my Unicorn on vacation got me missing the good ol’ days when we’d spot Unicorns on planes, in our chat sessions, in the beds next to us & in the break room at work. They may be harder to spot these days, but as evidenced by the following letters, they are still out there!

Dadcase Rob Patatinson

We need to get your dad one of THESE- A Dadcase to hold books 1-4. PLUS there's room for the New Moon lunchbox & thermos- perfect to tote your midday snack at work!

Dear LTT,

I had to share my Dad’s thought’s on Twilight… Yes, he has thoughts on Twilight!

First of all, my Dad is almost 60. He reads constantly – good literature, autobiographies, history. He’s been known to preview movies before letting his kids watch them, just to make sure that there weren’t any unexpected and HUGELY offensive surprises. Of course, now his youngest child is 30 so he didn’t really need to worry about what we might discover in these “teen books”!  So…why did he read ALL 4 BOOKS? Because he has two grown daughters who haven’t been able to get over them. We’ve been discreet but little things outing our enthusiasm occasionally slip past our self constructed censors… (i.e. I took a trip to visit my sister in Paris and we just so happened to wait in line with all of the Parisian twihards to see New Moon on opening weekend!)  They all added up to him becoming a little intrigued

So with shock and awe I lent him my precious 4 books. Here is his review (yes, he reviewed them without my prompting! He does things like that!):

“Okay, first, I’ll try not to give away the details as half the interest of a series on vampires and acquaintances is in the unfolding of the narrative.

Second, I surprised myself by really enjoying all four books – there is no way the movies can do justice … but I might sneak a peek at one of them anyway.

4 books:
Book 1 – good start for the first 25%, bogged down in the second 50% making me think this might really be chick romance literature with a few twists, but the last 25% was action filled and full of suspense.

Book 2 – Okay, vampires AND werewolves no less. Interesting, nothing so goofy that you can’t make yourself pretend its plausible – after all, we are reading about vampires …

Book 3 – Another twist! And another! and one or two more – the author keeps adding in “life” and this reader keeps reading to see if nothing else whether she can keep this tale together.

Book 4 – I could hardly bear another book – what else could the author do with this saga, and this book at least looks bigger than any of the first three… Well, she found new directions, and carried through. This one was a page turner 75% of the time. This reader was trapped in a story that simply had to be read, as I had no idea where it would go.

And from this saga, the author is able to speak on themes of love, loyalty, family, “extended family,” responsibility, decision making, trustworthiness, choices, regrets, etc that teens might not want to read of in any other way.

I know it should NOT be sold with a small group study guide … but it could be.”

Truly, this twilight thing IS like a drug! Could there actually be other Dad’s out there reading Twilight too??

Still in shock,
Sarah

A Unicorn…. at the gynecologist?  Oh yeah, read it after the jump! Continue reading

A special Twilight birthday wish, for a special Twilight Girl

Dear Moon,

Happy Birthday! If you remember your birthday at all last year (If I recall you went on a pub crawl, so you may not) we celebrated your birthday on LTT with birthday greetings from the Cullens.

Well, they’re too busy this year impressing men with their ability to fight as opposed to letting us women peek in our their most intimate moments together, which is why we liked their story in the first place (no I didn’t just watch the Oprah Eclipse trailer for the first time & noooo I don’t think they’re pushing hard to capture a male audience. Why would you think that!?) so I thought I’d check in with some our favorite Twilight actors & LTT-characters for birthday wishes for you. Well, let me be clear- I have no interaction with these people… but if I did, I’m SURE this is what they’d say:

Jackson:

Moon for your birthday I promise to shower & look like my picture to the left for at least 24 hours. PLUS, I’ll even put down the guitar and come over and watch all my episodes from The OC with you. Then I’ll act out the baseball scene from Twilight. And show you what else I can do with my bat.

Rob:

I know that every time I’m photographed out and about some where in LA you lament, “UH why was he THERE? He needs ME to show him where to hang out in LA.” Well, for your birthday I’ll let you be my LA travel guide. We can start with brunch at the little cafe down the hill from your house where UC loves to get coffee (you know- the one across from the pot smoker’s coffee shop- if we wanna stop in there later, I know a girl who can score us some weed), and then we’ll hit the thrift shops that the paparazzi don’t know about, followed up by a trip to Amoeba Music to check out their record collection (Slightly obvious, but I figured you would’t HATE it if we happened to get photographed together). Then you can show me some of LA’s best, unknown beaches and after laying out in the sun Tyler & Ally style we’ll go back to your place for a little dance party- since I know you love those- but it’ll just be you and me. How does that sound? And I’d like to see your record collection so if you wanna lead me up to your bedroom and show me where you keep the music… well, then.. I wouldn’t mind lounging on your bed while you educate me with your fine music skills….and if you want to lounge on your bed also… I won’t mind. I’ll even pretend not to notice the Edward Cullen pillowcase starting up at me from the head of the bed… After the records are over I hope you don’t mind if I pick up the guitar in the corner by your closet. I wrote a little something with you in mind… I might mumble it while lounging on your bed, if that’s okay with you. It’s okay if you get emotional. It’s okay if you stare intently at me- I’ll be staring back. If you need me to hold you I’ll do that too, but I promise you… I have bigger plans in mind….I always treat my travel guides with the utmost care & respect. And after all, we both deserve a “happy ending” [Uh, is it getting hot in here? And did I just say that about a Moon/Rob fantasy?)

After the jump, find out if Moon gets her birthday wish- a Fake Lesbian story starring her, Nikki & Kristen! Continue reading

Open Weekend Post: I can’t escape

Dear weekend LTTers,

You know how I went away all last week and left you for the glorious beaches of Riviera Maya, Mexico? For the first time in a LONG time I literally unplugged- my iPhone was off & in the safe- I checked my email 3 times mostly because I missed Moon & had funny stories to tell her about our mutual friend who got married at the beach and was the reason we went on this glorious vacation, but besides that and the occasional flipping to “Channel 38” (The porn channel) when the mini bar guy would come in to do a refill, just to make it real awkward, we were kickin’ it old school without internet, TV or any multimedia and it felt GOOD.

That’s not to say I didn’t miss you all. I did. In fact, I tried NOT to miss you. I tried to forget I have these blogs and forget I have these internet friends…. but- everywhere I turned I was SMACKED in the face with, what else? Twilight.

It was 1 hour into our flight when I finished my Sudoku puzzle in the US airways magazine and flipped the page to THIS:

(It was only playing on flights to Europe. I would have DIED if they played it for us!)

Literally seconds later my iPod started playing THIS:

Which is what I called THIS audio clip

Once my hubby & I got to the resort we tried to track down some grub. What did we see? Oh, Oregano, the Italian pizzeria, of course:

After eating that first day we hopped on the beach, relaxed next to the friends & family of the bride & groom and as I stretched out in the sun what did the mother of the groom pull out of her bag?

And later that day, as I lounged on a chair in the water next to the swim up bar, what was the guy reading in the chair next to me?

Uh huh. TWILIGHT. There was a UNICORN in MEXICO. A Mexicorn!!

As much as I wanted to, I resisted and did NOT bring Eclipse along with me on the trip. I want to read it before the movie releases next month, but this time I settled in with some fiction about death called The Book Thief. With a chapter title, of course, called: Eclipse

The groom to be- aka BFF James look-alike (remember him? He was the one who started Haiku’s for Kstew- yes ladies, he’s officially off the market) deingcided  he wanted to be embarassing to his friends and family with his bathing wear for the entire week. So he stocked up on all sorts of speedos. Mid-week he broke out the best of them- an American flag, USA-represent, teeny tiny, brief speedo. Which of course he wore with… what else?

JORTS

Did I ever mention how I’m the worst friend ever to Moon? For our 1 year anniversary back in December she had her jewelry designer friend CUSTOM MAKE me this amazing necklace. Guess what I got her? That’s right. Nothing. I think maybe I sent her an email. Anyway, I wear this necklace all the time. Normally I wear it with the side that says Moon To: UC facing front just in case anyone sees it. The other side says LTT/LTR and that’s harder to explain. But no one has ever asked me about my neckalce. Well, that is until last week, when I got asked multiple times a DAY what my necklace meant. My husband kindly informed me that my response of “Oh, it’s just an inside joke between a friend & me. We call each other these silly names” sounds really childish and stupid. I swear the woman who asked on the last day knew what it meant. She looked at me like she knew my secrets….

On our last evening, as we hung out in our favorite bar- a nice Mexican magician blew our minds with these amazing tricks. He was GREAT. I helped him with his last trick. He brought out these dirty cards & told me he found them in a coffin. He did the trick, blew some minds and at the very end, started talking in a sinister voice and smiled slowly… and as I watched FANGS formed in his mouth. These weren’t like dollar store fangs either- this dude was legit. I’m pretty sure he was actually a vampire.

That was it- my vacation away from it all- being unplugged, disconnected- utter relaxation… and I thought of Twilight… and as a result of YOU guys around EVERY corner!!!!!!

I missed you all!

XO,
UnintendedChoice

Where have YOU thought of Twilight lately.. when you should be thinking about something else?

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTR, The Forum, Twitter

My “Twilight: Is This Really Happening To Me” Moment

Dear LTT gals, ladies & Bobbygee (wherever you are, *sniff*),

I miss you. I’m here in sunny (please be sunny next week, please be sunny) Mexico just thinking about you, missing Moon, wondering what The Font & White Yorkie are confused about in the Twilight world & just all around really wishing you were all relaxing in paradise with me. Sorta.

Before I left for the land of never-ending margaritas, nachos on the beach & fresh lobster for dinner, I received an email from LTT-reader turned real-life friend turned girl who is going to make my gardens look pretty (her family owns a local nursery I love. Oh and by “gardens” I, of course, mean the 2 plastic pots I have sitting on the stoop outside of my apartment), Yellow911T, with the following message I just had to share:

This is normal: There are Virginia Blue Bells blooming all over the yard at our new house and it was looking a little too much like “the meadow” to resist. I borrowed cardboard Edward (Cardward? Boardward?) from my sister a had my fiancee take this picture for me. He was really embarrassed and worried that the neighbors might see us. Oh well.

I.Freakin.Love.Her (and seriously- those flowers are outside of her house!?).

What I love the most about it though is that it’s… just normal. For us anyway. Twilight has infiltrated so much of our lives. We all know that by now- nothing should shock us!

Then we go this email from a reader with the best story proving that exact point, and I had to share this as well!

The merging of two great things....

Dear LTT,

Very recently I went through one of those things in a young woman’s life that is both traumatic and earth shattering. I got dumped. By a guy I REALLY liked and thought could be “the one.” We had tons in common; he wasn’t a vampire (cause we all know how difficult that makes things), we both love Star Wars, and we had great chemistry. BOOM. He even admitted on our first date he has seen the Twilight movies with his 13 year old niece, he didn’t love them, but he saw them because she loves them. Nice right? I thought so too. So after awhile of courting (he was Edward old fashioned, he even like butterscotch candies) I felt safe enough to say “this guy is my boyfriend and everything is FANTASTIC!”

Man, was I wrong. Shortly after my announcement to family and friends that we were exclusive, said “boyfriend” told me he didn’t think I was “appropriate” for his type of life style. What this really meant was that he, being old fashioned, didn’t think my “fast” personality was right for him. That I wasn’t a “good” girl. I was devastated. Not only am I a good girl, I’m a great girl. Sure, I occasionally partake in alcohol, cigarettes, Twilight movies, and sexy make outs (trying to keep it PG-13), but that doesn’t make me “fast.” So I did what all girls do when they’re grieving (no not a three month montage to Lykke Li) I went out with my girlfriends to get drunk. Is it constructive? No. Does it help make the sad thoughts diminish for a few hours? Yes. So we go out to the local bars and who do we run into……the very, very recent ex.

That was the last straw. He looked at me with those judgmental eyes, I stared back with my drunk KStew bitch face, and I knew what I had to do. I had to find my back up, my second in command, the old stand by, I needed to find my Jacob Black. And three shots of tequila later I did. One of my oldest, dearest friends walks into the bar and walks right over to me. We are incredibly close and on occasion, have been known to “hook up.” So while the ex looked on I weaved my magic with my version of Jacob Black and before you know it we’re having a steamy make out session Twilight Fan Fic worthy. Still aggravated about being dumped cause I wasn’t a good girl, I asked, “do you think I’m a good girl?” To which he replies “anyone who leg hitches like that isn’t a good girl.” Word for word. I almost died. DIED laughing. Here we are in this intimate moment and I’m laughing my ass off and say “did you just say leg hitch, while my leg is wrapped up around your hip?” He says “yeah so what?” So what? Well now my attention was completely turned to David Slade, Eclipse, Edward, LTT comments, and most of all the question “is the guy I’m about to sleep with a unicorn?” Turns out….he is. He’s actually a Twilight-word-using unicorn. If I hadn’t completely sobered up at this point I would have thought I was dreaming. But I wasn’t. This ridiculous situation was actually happening.

After realizing a Twilight-word-using unicorn had his hand up my shirt a mixture of arousal/disgust washed over me. I didn’t know if I should be offended that my leg hitching made me “bad” or excited cause maybe I could rope this mythical creature and keep him forever. Turns out, unicorns aren’t all they are cracked up to be and his fondness for Ashley Greene annoys and confuses me. SO needless to say I used that unicorn and then sent him back to the depths of RPatz’s hair forest until I need to use him again, but I’ll never forget the night “leg hitching” was used to describe an aggressive sexual foreplay move in real life and not just by the craziness that is Stephanie Meyer.

Love,

TeamJorts

Oh girl- The ONLY thing that would have made this story better was if you were actually WEARING jorts at the time!!

So I must get back to my vacationing in the land of Tequila Tomas (he says hi). As Twilight follows me EVERYWHERE, I’m sure I will come home regaling you with stories of Mexican-Twilight adventures. Get ready!

Love,
UnintendedChoice

What is your “Twilight: Is this really happening to me?” Moment?

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTT, The Forum, Twitter

Twilight and LTT become more than just a book and more than just a blog for Freya

*I hope you have some water proof mascara on and a hankie handy cause Freya write US  (that doesn’t happen very often!) a special letter on her one year anniversary*

awwww memories!

Dear Moon and UC:

It’s my one year anniversary commenting on LTT!  I finally came out of lurkdom on April 19, 2009, and commented on a post on Kellan.  I’d been hanging out on LTR and LTT for about a month, since the Twilight DVD came out, and I saw how cute Rob was when he talked on the commentary, and I proceeded to Google everything Twi-related.  Which, of course, led me to you.

I have to get a little Twintimental and Twilosophic here, which is not my normal way, but I have to say, Twilight and LTT have changed my life.  Literally.  I knew when I put my first comment out there that I was stepping into an established society of commenters.  I felt like it was already a clique as people commented back and forth all day long, not just talking about Twilight, but also about daily life.  I was worried, because I had never commented on a blog before. But Kellan was oiled up and dirty and reading Purpose-Driven Life and Moon referenced the Song of Solomon—I couldn’t help but ask Kellan to reenact passages from the Song of Solomon with me.  And low and behold, out of the 27 comments that day (can you believe it?  So few!), both VickyB and Moon responded back to me, laughing at my joke! (Moon, the first few times you or UC commented on anything I wrote, I fangirled a little.  I won’t lie.) I became a commenter in that moment.  Then the Forum came along, and I really started to interact with the lovely ladies of LTT.

Then came Twitter, and I was a goner.  I could Tweet all day long, look at pictures of Rob, and keep abreast of all the Twi news.  And in the course of that, I really got to know some people. I began to associate names and faces with the funny, witty comments.  I began to share more and more of myself.  And it rose above being just about those “vegetarian vampires” or Rob’s hotness, and instead became about the relationships that I was lucky enough to develop.

Who doesn't write their 1st novel in silver ink?

When I first read Twilight (and subsequently New Moon, Eclipse, and Breaking Dawn in rapid succession), I had decided to be pragmatic.  I gave up on having a dream in life.  I didn’t have time for love, friendships, or my own creativity.  There was work, and blankly staring at the TV, and that was pretty much it.  I felt numb.  Then (as dumb as it may seem), I read Twilight, and fell a little bit in love with Edward.  And like an involuntary itch that you have to scratch, I found the need to write something.  In the course of three months, I wrote an entire novel.  I will never publish this novel, but it was an amazing experience, because I knew that I COULD write a whole book, if I wanted to.  That was empowering to me.  And I felt more alive than I had in a long time.  Then I began to get to know people (now that I wasn’t holed up with my novel every night), and I started to really want to be friends with people I was meeting, not just to talk about Twilight.

Some of my best friends now are people I met here, and I couldn’t be more grateful.  I’ve done a few meet-ups with some fantastic people—Brooke Lockart, Marta, Stage Manage This, It’s La Push Baby, Jordan the unicorn, and Krazy Kidd are people I’ve all been fortunate enough to meet in real life. I’ve got big vacation plans for this summer to meet up with even more fabulous people I’ve met here.

I could have never predicted, last year when I first hesitantly wrote my mini-letter to Kellan, how much I would need friends this year.  That I would need people who lived outside of my life, who could listen, sympathize, and laugh with me.  People to talk books and music and makeup with on any given day.  People who would give me a new perspective and enrich my life.  Letters to Twilight has given me people who seem hand-picked, just right for being my friends. They  have been the key to my sanity when my world seems insane, the refuge from all the things I can’t control right now.

So, to my LTT friends, thank you for being good friends.  For all the talks, the gifts, the encouragement, and the love, I thank you so much. My world would be bleak without your friendship.

Yea, thanks guys!

To the cast of Twilight, thank you for being so ridiculously good-looking.  Not to mention funny, bright and interesting enough for me to YouTube you, Google you, and find this place.

To Stephenie Meyer, thank you for listening to Bella and Edward and making them come to life in the pages of your books.  Without them, I wouldn’t have had the impetus to make some changes in my life and to reach out to these people.  You are to credit for creating this community in the first place.

To Moon and UC, thank you for being so incredibly funny and devoted and for becoming my friends, as well.  I know you never anticipated this being what it is now, and that it’s evolved almost organically.  But the fact is, without your willingness to slog through every day, whether you felt like it or not, this all would not be.  You’ve brought together hundreds of people.  You’ve spawned countless friendships.  You’ve given us a spot in your lives, and in turn, have received a spot in ours.  I love you ladies.

My love for Twilight may wane, my love for Rob cool to passing interest, but for the very real people here, I hope that our friendships last a very long time, indeed.

Love,
Freya

dangit Freya now my eye make ups all jacked up but I lurve you anyway! We’ve said it a billion times bit we’re glad we can be a place where friends meet and friendships are born. Twilight is just the catalyst for all this and we couldn’t be happier because of it. So have you made any friends through LTT/LTR or that Micheal Buble forum you’re apart of or the NKOTB fan club you were in back in the day? Tell me about i!

Our internet game is still ridiculous: The Forum, LTR, Twitter

Appreciation for the supporting cast

We love the Twilight supporting cast- we really do. From Butcrack Santa to Tequila Tomas, and Big Daddy Lautner to Michael Oregano we can’t get enough of them. Even if they were killed off in the first movie, don’t really exist or aren’t really ‘cast’ members- they are in our hearts. We’re not alone in our love for the smaller parts of the Twilight cast:
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Dear Twilight,
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I would like to express my appreciation for your supporting characters who don’t get as much time in the limelight as the main cast:

Thank you for staring at me, my young friends...

Aro– Thanks for being a traditional vamp. You’re an intriguingly odd blend of hand wringing, “My Precious” coveting, Golum mixed with Paul Reubens from the Buffy movie. Your cat-playing-with-a-mouse demeanor just kills. I may have even dabbled a little in Team Aro on occasion (just briefly and ’cause I’m old). But alas, Aro, I don’t think you’d be on my team, ifyouknowwhatimsayin.


Jane’s Eyebrows- Above that fabulous smokey eye is a well groomed, but very prominently wide eyebrow. It’s comforting. It takes me back to my early childhood in the 80’s where eyebrows were encouraged to run wild. It was a simplier time for eyebrows, back then. Brooke Shield’s -before-she-was-peddling-Latisse caterpillers were “the Rachel” of the eyebrow world. True, we have Rob’s free range eyebrows, but they are an entity all to themselves. Jane’s eyebrows are a waxed, 2nd cousin to Robs. If Rob is Team Eyebrow’s pitcher, Jane is the teams first baseman.
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Anna Kendricks Boobs– Seriously, you could bake cookies on that rack and everyone appreciates a good boob. Daily, I am awash in a sea of clevage (Snow, are you a stripper? No. Are you a mammogram tech? No… I just live in the OC) and all I can say is Nice Tits. Go Team Boobs!
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Carlisle’s Scarf Collection– Carlisle, I’m jealous and I admire your appreciation of neckware. You’ve seen centuries of neckcessories come and go, from Ruffs, to Cravats, to Ascots, to Neckties, and now scarves. I bet you have some cashmere beauties tucked away. Caius likes scarves too. Were you two, like, scarf buddies back in the day? Team Scarf? (OK I just pictured the opening scarf scene from “Basic Instinct” and now I’m a little creeped out). Anyway, I’d love any of your cast offs. Mmmmm I bet they smell delicious.
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Jacob’s Teary Wolf Eye– Oh how you made me howl with sadness and oh how I was Team Jacobed in that moment. The “Academy” should give a nod to The Eye. The Eye made me feel. The Eye can ACT. (OK, maybe I’m projecting here because my dog gives me the same sad eye, hang head, dejectedly skulks out of the room whenever he catches me putting on non-dog walking shoes. Guilt is powerful). Oh Sad Wolf Eye, how you break my heart.
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Ashley Greene’s Painted on Bikini Pictures– Many of us have that pesky 15 5 pounds to lose. I lost 4 lbs. following the What Would Ashley Eat diet. On “What Would Ashley Eat”, or W.W.A.E. for short, One simply asks herself when, say, choosing a salad dressing, would Ashley pick Bleu Cheese? HALE No. She’d probably use lemon juice and salt &pepper. Lemon is a great diet aide. You don’t get those fierce hollow cheeks without suckin some sour. For that 9 PM snack, when dinner just wasn’t quite enough, instead of reaching for crackers (would Ashley? No), grab some almonds and a big glass of tequilla organic fat free milk. I’m thinkin there is another component to this diet, like What Would Ashley Throw-up, but I’m not going to go there.
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Appreciating the supporting cast like a good bra,
snowwhitedrifted


Don’t forget Angela’s camera! And what about that kid who almost kills Bella with his car? And MRS. Cope! Poor flustered by 17-year-old Edward-Cullen, Mrs. Cope! What secondary “Characters” do YOU love!?

Our internet game is still ridiculous: The Forum, LTR, Twitter