My FanFic Storyline Ideas – Vol 1: JediWard


Dear Twilight Fan Fiction writers-

Yesterday, while on Twitter I saw a trending topic called “Jedward” which as it turns out is some weird incestuous looking brother singing duo but because I’m not “down with the kids” like Billy Black, it made me think some FanFic writer created a hillbilly Edward hybrid. I tweeted it cause I think I’m funny sometimes and as it turned out I wasn’t the only one and someone else thought it was “Jediward” a Star Wars version of Edward. And THAT got me to thinking. What would Star Wars look like with Twilight characters subbed in? Now, I’m sure I’m going to get crucified by White Yorkie and the Font for attempting or even entertaining such SciFi/Fantasy heresy but I just have to explore the complete craziness of this idea.

With this in mind I present to you our latest series: My Fanfiction Storyline Ideas! Because I think of some pretty absurd ideas and feel like it’s my duty to share them with the word and please writers if you feel like taking up this mantle of absurdity, feel free. I just come up with the ideas if you can make it reality than more power to you and more laughing for me!

Click to enlarge and possibly frame

Title: Star Wars: May the Forks Be With You!
AU, Non canon Twi and Non Canon Star Wars (too hard, I tried), Scifi, Romance, Angst

A long time ago, in a galaxy far far away… a rebellion begins against the evil Volturi Empire to take back the Republic and destroy the evil Darth Aro and his massive Death Star space station. Captured by the Empire while on a spy mission, Princess Bella who has the stolen Death Star blueprints hides them in escaped droids Eric2-D2 and Mike3PO.

EEEDDDWWWAAARRDDDD I am your sisterrrrr!!

Later on the planet of La Pushtouine, Edward Skywalker purchases Eric2-D2 and Mike3PO and accidentally uncovers a secret message from Princess Bella asking Charlie-Wan Kenobi to help as he’s her only hope. Inspired to help this girl Edward finds Charlie-Wan and they set out to find the Rebels to deliver the message and rescue Princess Bella. In need of transport and a secret passage they hire space pilot without a cause Jazz Solo and his Wookie co-pilot Chewbacob to lead them to the rebels.

Follow the cut to see what happens

Along the way Charlie-Wan begins to teach Edward about the forks, a mystical power that can only be harnessed by a trained few like the Jedi who use the forks for good. Charlie-Wan is ultimately killed in a showdown with Darth Aro that leads to Princess Bella’s rescue. Realizing he needs more training to become a Jedi, Edward Skywalker seeks out Master Carlisle-da to teach him the ways of the forks.

Who are you calling a nerfherder?!

To ultimately become a Jedi, Edward Skywalker must face Darth Aro in a duel to the death using dazzle sabers.  Will Edward be able to harness the forks to overcome Darth Aro and restore peace to the Galaxy? Will Edward and Bella confront the powerful but awkward feelings between them? Will Edward, Charlie-Wan, Jazz and Chebacob escape the crazy creatures at the Mos Angeles Cantina by lulling them into submission with a karaoke quartet?

You’ll just have to wait and see…

So as you can see besides having an overactive imagination and access to photoshop I have ideas FOR YOU! And if this doesn’t tickle your fancy don’t worry, I’ve got story ideas for days! Stay tuned!

The forks is strong in this one,

So what did I miss? Who’s gonna be an Ewok? Should the Dazzle Saber be like diamonds in the sun?

Thanks to Rob’s Buttons Babe for the first image.  The rest of these crazy images are mine!

*Obviously this is a joke, please no Star Wars freak outs*

Our internet game is still ridiculous: The Forum, LTR, Twitter

167 Responses

  1. Good Morning everyone..celebrating 32 yrs. w/the hubs today,,!!!

    • Congratulations!

      la-la-la, la-la-la-la…

      that’s awwsome. Still in love? do you need to borrow Ed & Bell’s cottage? 😉

    • Congrats!!

      • @Ambushed & SuperH…Many thanks..keep in mind I was a child bride…I can say we are still in love…I even put Blanket Eddie away (actually in the wash) for the occasion! Although I think I slipped up already…hubs says first thing this a.m. as he delivered very large mug of coffee “Happy Anniversary”..I respond “Bite me” …oops!

        • Bite me could be construed in two different ways. Happy Anniversary!

          • Lord Bless him…he just laughed…I REALLY did mean to say..(of course in Bella’s BEST sexy voice) ..”kiss me”…but after back to back viewings of Twllight and NM and no sleep…”Bite me” just rolled off my tongue..

        • Congratulations Midnight Cyn and Mr.Cyn.

        • So there actually are people who imprint/fall in love at 2 years old – I am learning something new here everyday..! 😉
          May you have another happy 32!

          • Oh yes its true!! How did you know we were only 2 when struck by the love bug???Wat that’s another movie…lol…thanks for all the well wishes…(but unless we both get “turned” and fast, I don’t want to see what I look like in another 32 yrs!)

        • BHAHAHAHAHA! That’s awesome. Congratulations!

    • Happy Anniversary, Cyn!! Congratulations!

    • Happy Anniversary MidCyn and Mr. MidCyn! And we all know you got married as a child. Mr. MidCyn must have imprinted on you early. Can’t blame him! Mwah!

      • ((Hugs)) Ang…yes I was not much older than Renestupidnamee when the love bug bit…(yeah still stuck on the whole bite me thing)!
        (Still trying to come up with a way to get the hubs to stand outside in the cold for a few minutes or lock him in the fridge just long enough to add a chill when we finally lock lips!) LOL..

        • Follow up…Not sure whether to be insulted or thrilled..(Twilight what have you done to me???) Hubs just came in to refill coffee again and leaned over and gave me a kiss………ON THE FOREHEAD……Now I could be insulted that it was on the forehead OR I could believe in the fantasy of Edward kissing Bella with such passion on the forehead at the hospital…..scratches head…if I go with the insult..then its hall sex for him (for the benefit of you youngsters..that means when you pass your SO in the hall you say..FU)…or I could go with the thrill…which has a much better outcome… 😉

          • Go with the thrill — its your anniverary, you both deserve a little sumpthin’ sumpthin’ — know what I mean 😉

            And congrats on 32 years!!! Gives hope to the rest of us that marriages CAN last!

          • Absolutely the thrill…not an insult! Seriously, Edward has made the forehead kiss hot!

        • @ Ang..I know you meant “Edward has made the forehead kiss.. cool..very cool! LOL….

    • Happy Anniversary! ❤

    • Congrats, Cyndi! 🙂

    • Congratulations to you both. I can tell Mr. and Mrs. Cyn have a lovely and interesting relationship. Do you think you can talk Mr. Cyn into writing a letter to LTT discussing his side of things, you know, just for balance?

      • LOL..Oh its been interesting to say the have NO IDEA..especially PRE-accident!!! The stories I could/won’t tell…and there is not a chance in Hale that the hubs would EVAR write a letter since he really doesn’t have a clue about LTT!!! Now that I think of it, it is the first real secret I have never told him!

        Again, thanks so much for all the well wishes from my friends! I ❤ you all for sharing this day with me/us!

    • Congratulations and Happy Anniversary!!!

  2. Star Wars – Twilight

    Moon, I think you are gonna to cause heads to explode in the SW Fandom.

    Nice manip of jediward. ( mmmmbeardward)

    • YES! This feels so right on so many levels! I always thought there was something non-articulate about Jacob, and as Chewbacob he would only have to growl (sorry Taylor, take one for the fans!) so that would kind of be in character. Plus Bella could whack him out of the way and call him a “walking carpet” – that would totally be in character too!

      Plus the big plus with Jediward is he actually WON’T marry Bella in this version, so her BFF may turn up and get dazzled instead in this version…(Bagsy-me that part!)

    • trust me i told someone whos a big SW fans and they about died. JOKES are fun though people, embrace them!

  3. Those pictures are priceless.
    And Chewbacob, Charlie-Wan, Darth Aro, La Pushtouine? Win!

  4. BAHAHAHA! So much win! I couldn’t stop my guffawing, I know everyone I’m working with (including my boss) knows I’m not working right now and I don’t even care, it was totally worth it and completely unavoidable.

    The pictures! So brilliant!

    Mike3PO! WIN! Although C3PO is pretty camp so maybe he should be Eric instead?

    PS: Let it be known I hate the other version of ‘Jedward’ – Simon Cowell has so much to answer for.

    • I’ve never even seen Star Wars (yeah, I know) and this is still awesome.

      If I wasn’t having a technofail I’d post the ‘Oops I did it again’ Jedward vid from the X Factor – youtube it people, it’s as creepy as male identical twins singing Britney sounds like it should be.

      • I cannot believe Jedward have been namechecked on LTT! AND trending on Twitter what’s happening to the universe?

    • i clicked on it to figure out what the HALE jedward was and i was CREEPED out. who likes that?! they’re obviously doing each other.

  5. The best effing plot ever!
    Someone (not Cathy the Cougar) should totally make a movie.

  6. “Will Edward be able to harness the forks to overcome Darth Aro and restore peace to the Galaxy? Will Edward and Bella confront the powerful but awkward feelings between them? Will Edward, Charlie-Wan, Jazz and Chebacob escape the crazy creatures at the Mos Angeles Cantina by lulling them into submission with a karaoke quartet?”

    This is so Danger Mouse!
    I really hope someone remembers Danger Mouse. He was my hero.

  7. This is just too. awesome. But you did forget about Tylero Calrissian.

  8. Bahahahaha! This is brilliant. Absolutely brilliant. While you had me at “Charlie-Wan Kenobi,” may I just say “dazzle sabers” for the win! I think we may have replaced “sparklepeen” as my favorite euphemism.

    Not to ruin it for anyone who hasn’t seen Star Wars (for shame), but I also like Edward and Bella as brother and sister. Jasper’s way more suited as Jazz Solo than Edward would be.

    But, here’s a question: who’s going to be Jabba?

  9. Moon, I tried..really I did..but I can’t wrap my mind around things like “Later on the planet of La Pushtouine, Edward Skywalker purchases Eric2-D2 and Mike3PO and accidentally uncovers a secret message from Princess Bella asking Charlie-Wan Kenobi to help as he’s her only hope”….it just doesn’t compute….its just too hard (twss)….I think I need a new CPU…!!! 😉

    • it was too complex for me, too… am trying to guzzle down coffee and try again later…

      May the “Forks” be with you!

      • LOL..May the Forks be with you also…I have tried the coffee (3rd mug now) and still trying to decipher.. once I hit ” Edward Skywalker purchases Eric2-D2 and brain or lack thereof strayed away like it was trying to figure out a complex math problem…. ;(

        • Maybe if you read that paragraph aloud while watching the actual movie, everything will kind of fall into place…? 🙂

  10. Last week you combined Rob with Pride and Prejudice, and this week you mix Edward with Star Wars. I can now die happily.

    I will put you in my will, obviously.

  11. I haven’t read the whole post yet but I have to say the “Click to enlarge and possibly frame” pic… forget the possibly. That is brill!!!

  12. The “Edward I am your sister” pic is possibly the hottest Edward I have seen in a while.
    Thank you to Moon and her photoshop

  13. Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaaa. To say I love this post would be to understate it. I fluffing adore it. I want to whisper sweet nothings in its ear. I would kick Jacob out of bed for it….unless he dresses as an actual Wookie.

    Bella would look so much better in the bikini thing with the hair muffins than in ANYTHING that SM has put her in.

    Big Daddy as Jabba? SO hilar I can no longer speak. Not being rude here, I call my own weight loss attempts Operation Jabba, Mark 1, 2 etc.

    Enough thumbs up to crush you Moon!

    Now if only someone would mix Bagpuss & Twilight…I could die happy.

    • Bella as Emily? Jacob as the stuffed wolf that only wakes up after the shop closes? I smell a winner.

      • Beautiful. Wipes tear…

        Oh & if The Font & Dwight Yorkie (I’m British) don’t like it, you know what? They can EAT MY JORTS.

        I’m old enough to have seen Star Wars the first time round, in the cinema so I loved it before they did. And this post is only right & proper. If they don’t approve it’s only because of that stupid whY chromosome they both have.

  14. Nnnargh hgraoo rrhaa! Hnaarr oorrawarr! Arrawarrgh graa! Arrrarroowwrrerr! ChaCha!

    (That’s the sound Chewy makes. I googled it. That means I like this but don’t know what the hell to say because I haven’t seen Star Wars since I went on that date to see one of the new ones and made out the entire time in the back row. Not a good idea, btw. Armrests get all up in your business. That wasn’t with the current Mr. Fang. It was the pot smoking eighteen year old I was with when I was fourteen. Well, that’s enough about my lame existence. I have no idea why I’m putting all of this in parentheses but I’ll just get over it and close them now.)

  15. Edward would def. make a better Luke than Han. I mean, what about when Han’s getting ready to meet his frozen doom and Leia is all, “I love you!” and like a badass he just says, “I know.” Edward would have totally gone all emo and, “I love you! I love you more. Irrevocobly!!! IRREVOCOBLY!!”

  16. This is so genius, Moon. I don’t even have the words to properly express how impressed I am. My love for Moon and UC is eclipsing (huzza!) my love for Twilight. I’m going to go start writing this fanfic now.

  17. LMAO! Wow, Rob makes a hot Luke Skywalker! I think if the cast were Star Wars peeps, I’d actually watch it! LOL!

  18. As an avid fanfic reader/writer, this is hands down the best thing I’ve seen on here yet. I do not believe I’ve laughed this hard at anything in forever. The sad thing is, I’ve seen fan fiction written like this and it never ceases to amaze me the story lines people come up with.

    By far my week is complete! Poochimama called me first thing this a.m. and the ONLY thing she could say because she was laughing so hard was “LTT, LTT” which is code for ‘Get your ass to letters to twilight right now or else you’ll regret it…’

  19. Brilliant, Moon!

    But what about the Emperor???
    –Buttcrack Santa?

    little bottles, evil laugh…

  20. Stepping on soapbox for a moment:
    The Robsten will need very large Light saber (twss) now that there is a “bounty” on their heads…seriously.. I read this very disturbing “article” during the night:

    “If you’re in London and happen to spot Rob and Kristen — together in the British capital — and are able to get a picture, we’ll pay you for it.
    If you have a pic — and are able to prove that it has been taken over the past few days — please email tips@(deleted on purpose)
    If we publish your pictures, we’ll pay you at least £50 for using them.
    We’ll pay more depending on the quality of the snaps; what Rob and Kristen are doing in the snaps; the age of the photo (the newer, the better); and the amount of pictures you send in.”

    This really upset me..bad enough they have the paparazzi
    after them 24/7…this “tabloid” (said with much distaste and disgust) decides to set “fans” on the loose to hunt them down!
    I think this is a very dangerous line to cross…not all “fans” are stable, can we say Pattinson pants lady?? and with the economy the way it is..every pyscho out there..(no not referring to anyone here lol) will grab a camera and “go for it”….
    Does this bother anyone other than me??
    Stepping down carefully off soapbox.. 😉

    • That is super-creepy and disturbing. I guess celebrities have bodyguards for a reason, though. We have a free press, and as long as we do, being the target of the media – no matter how extreme they might be- comes with the territory of being in the public spotlight. I just would never have the conscience, though, to work for one of those dirty mags/tabaloids or sell a photo to one of them. Ew.

      • I think this whole idea really upsets me b/c I used to live in a place where tons of celebs came..(twss) and the reason they did visit there was the local folks left them alone to walk the streets/shop/eat out etc., Now take that same scenario and post a WANTED sign on every corner offering people money for every picture they get and those same ordinary ppl become stalkers…cause as they say “money talks”…its just digusting..IMO

        • MidCyn- can I just say that I love how you include “twss” in every post, even the tweed-serious ones? You make me laugh!

    • Hey, you know pattinson Pants lady has been by here before. She’s stable, she just likes funny pants…..

      • Most humble apology’s to Pattinson Pants disrespect intended….Only thing I could pull out of pee brain… ;)!!

        • Yeah, PPL seems pretty cool. Rob even gave her pants a thumbs up!

          *mumbling* Lucky crafty bitch…

          • Afternoon JodieO!! Your right..she was crafty!! We should come up with something totally out there and maybe we can get a nod or sumpthin..P.S. .I am so excited for you..I can hardly stand it!!!
            How is your weather? Nasty nasty here…lost power once last night..right as Edward went in for the kiss..I thought for a moment that the myth was true and the Earth moved or something!! When it came back on it screwed up my TV and just about everything light colored was sparkly..Truth..Oldest daughter was (forced into) watching it with me and was like “Wow..its really cool like this..” LOL…

          • It’s rainy and windy and nasty. YUCK! I hope it stops before I have to fly out!

            That sucks that you lost power, but it sounds like a fun time watching the movie. Hee! Didja get my email?

  21. The inner fangirl in me is so in love with you right now. I only love Star Wars because of my son, who quizzes me daily on my knowledge of characters, weapons, ships, etc. And I always get schooled by the boy. Maybe in Volume 2, you could work in Padme Hale or Billy the Hut or Felix Maul.

  22. W.O.W.

    that there’s some funny stuffs. I would like to personally invite White Yorkie and The Font to come and TRY and crucify you over this. THEY CAN’T. It’s too hilarious and they know it!!!!!!!

    May the Forks be with you. I am totally saying that today!!

  23. omg. you know SO MUCH ABOUT STAR WARS.

    You are so much geekier than I realized!

    • I know! I thought Moon was the one who said ‘May the Source be with you…’ Was that you, then?

    • AHAHAHA i am a nerd and i have an older brother who was/is into this stuff so i saw these movies a bunch growing up. and i even saw a few of the “newer” ones at the midnight showings when they came out. and well, besides, they’re just plain awesome! AND a good source for studying character archetypes! HELLOOO AP english

  24. Gah! This is madness! Madness, I tell you!

    Okay, really, it’s brilliant, but I still have to cry foul. Bella and Edward CANNOT be brother and sister! I realize that the sparklepeen is much more hilarious as a lightsaber than as a blaster, but you’re rewriting Lucas here. And we DON’T rewrite Lucas. At least, not when it comes to Star Wars. If you wanna spoof the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull and NOT put Indy in a refrigerator, that’s fine by me.


    PS Laurent Calrissian. Janego and Alecba Fett.

    • did you read my authors note about it not being canon? try bending twi characters to sw not exactly easy to work out and besides its a joke!

      • I did read your author’s note. I read the whole post. Did you read where I said it was brilliant?

        I understood it was a joke. My comment was, too.

  25. Instead of “That’s no moon,” it will be “They’re not bears!”

  26. This is SO brill! I love Star Wars, but this has some hilariously awesome potential. Can we throw in some tweed on their robes to make it “serious”? The people from the Hillywood Show need to get their hands on this! (Twss)

    PS I’m watching the Today show, and I could have sworn this team USA women’s hockey player just said her son was named Cullen. And her last name is Potter. Cullen Potter. Holy cow.

  27. i want Jasper to be an ewok. They can just make one big costume out of his already nappy and matted hair wigs.

  28. Would Big Daddy be Jabba the Hut?

  29. I’m kind of speechless. This is really incredible, Moon. I am so impressed with your Star Wars knowledge and photoshop skills.

  30. I love Star Wars, but this!! This was freaking brilliant! I’m laughing so hard I’m crying 😀

  31. I dont know why, but I keep picturing Alice as R2-D2, I mean he was a cheeky bastard, right?? and hyper! Alice would be a perfect fit! AL2-D2 and Jas3Po could be robots in love…

  32. “Darth Aro” would be a good band name.

  33. LOL!!! That was brillz.

  34. LMFAO. It’s like a star wars madlib, but with twilight names.

    Love it!

  35. This is all just so wrong, it’s right. Ewoks = wolfpack. Bless their furry little heads.

    • Yes, in this version the wolf pack get to be fuzzy and adorable instead of testosterone-driven and obnoxious..when they are not trying to fry you alive, or poke you with their little spears, of course!

  36. have you called rob bout it? what did he said? did he ask for cigarettes and booze as payment?
    WE MUST GET CHRIS “I dont know how to spell his last name” TO MAKE IT A MOVIE!

    if you find a story like this in fanfiction please tell me! 😀

    it was just awesome… seriously? Jacob is Chewaka? pure genious… Mike3PO? best dang thing in the twi-wars universe…

  37. Brillz! Can someone please post a photoshopped pic of Michael Sheen with the darth helmet on? Pretty please?

    Heavy robot breath…”Use the ‘forse'”..heavy robot breath…”Edward…I am your father…” Heavy robot breath…”Spanish influenza almost killed me but then I got this nifty suit…”

  38. *Mumbles…*

    Should be called Moon Wars.

    And the sequel can be New Moon Wars.


  39. This is brilliant! One question though: the first picture brings a question to mind – If Edward is going to use his dazzling force to conquer the Emperor, does that mean he will also leave a wake of pregnant Imperial soldiers behind…?

    • Of course – that must have been the prequel to the Clone wars. There was no cloning, they just let Jediward loose on the soldiers they had and – presto! – they multiplied in his tracks!

  40. Jane as the Emperor!

  41. WIN.

    mayjah win.
    That is all.

    ❤ Ash

  42. I tried a lightsaber from my Star Wars action figures – too small (twss). Will try Lord of the Rings action figures swords when I locate them. I feel that Edward deserves a sword! He could kill anyone who tries to sneak into my bedroom window.

    Yes, I am a nerd who collects action figures.

  43. Guess what? I am not bothering to read this messed up shizz. You know why? FF is YUCK!

    I Love REAL BOOKS!

    PurityRingsAgainstFFUNITE! (Yes, The Font and White Yorkie, I like to write my chants all as one word. It’s a Twitter thing)

    Crazy ass bitches, stay away from the FF!

  44. This post is so win.

    Now I feel less guilty about going to see New Moon in the $3 theater that serves beer. I’m not sure how the two correspond, but they must in some way.

  45. haha post= win

    my fiance is always torturing me about reading “the fic”. he constantly says “seriously, haven’t you read them all yet?”

    i have told him about tattward, doucheward, domward, nakedward, paintward, and he laughs his ass off.

    he actually gave me a funny idea for a lemony comedic AH fic. he said bella and edward should meet working at a tollbooth and that he should be a manwhore and his nickname would be “coinslot eddie” and there would be some lemons up against the tollbooth window. i might attempt a funny one shot or something. (so don’t go all nikki reed and leak my idears) haha

    • Hahaha! Coinslot Eddie! I love it. Please write this. I’m pretty confident that it’d be the first tollward ever.

  46. I love Star Wars. Especially Return of the Jedi.

    I also love Twilight.

    I do not love fanfic. But this was hilarious, Moonie. Dudes are gonna be killing each other to get a chance at that piece.

    (That piece=YOU.)

  47. I am all kinds of hot for Jazz Solo, but where is Emmett?

    I do hope you come up with a fanfic combining Twilight and Lord of the Rings. Great post Moon, as always you tickle my funny bone!

  48. I don’t even know what to say. This was an infinite WIN of EPIC proportions.

    Pure genius. You’ve still got it!!


  49. Im a little late in the game here, had trouble all day with my internet connection! But this was totes worth reading and so funny!! 😀

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