Twilight Secrets: Everyone still has one

Dear Twilight Secret Keepers,

I love hearing your secrets!

More secrets after the jump!

Love that last one!

What are YOUR Twilight secrets!?
And if you have some you don’t want to share publically, e-mail them to us! And check out our Past Twilight Secret Posts. Post #1 and Post #2

Thanks to ALL the secret senders AND to Kristin, who made most of these secrets look oh-so-pretty!!!

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253 Responses

  1. Bahahahahahahahaha!!!!
    Duuuuuude, I think these are the most hilarious ones yet!
    I so needed a laugh after hearing some bad news (New Moon is not out on DVD here til April 14 *madface*)
    I DO have two cats named Charlie and Edward (Charlie, ironically, was named Billy before we got him). NOT named after Twilight though. Seriously, naming my cat after a hawt fictional vamp? That would creep me out.

    Here’s a “secret” though:
    When I was on my big holiday beginning of last year I was on my first run through the books. I was on the phone to my brother one night and he said to me “Edward misses you”. My heart skipped a beat and I though “ZOMG!” . . . then I realised he meant me cat.

    • Why is Australia always behind everyone else when it comes to release dates? It sucks (pardon the semi-pun)

      • I have no idea 😦
        We got the actual film release almost 48 hours BEFORE the US but now we gotta wait THREE weeks after them for the DVD!

      • It’s because you are Down Under, and everything travels more slowly once it passes the equator. It has got something to do with the time-space continuum, but I am not sure I could explain it to you in lay language. *pushing glasses higher up on nose*

      • It’s like the water going down the drain in the other direction because of the rotation of the earth. DVD release dates also spin in the opposite direction. On the plus side, you do get to live in the future!

    • lol Jayde! Love your secret!

      Why dont you send some cash to one of us U.S. ppl and we can send you back the movie? then you can get it in March like everyone else! I am brilliant.

    • *Plays Twilight Zone music* That’s just eerie about Billy the cat being renamed Charlie pre-Twilight!

      • Maybe whoever named and re-named the cat is psychic, like Alice? (Hm, as a psychic, would a vision of a cat’s future name come to you spontaneously, or would you have to go fishing after it, I wonder..?)

        • Actually I knew him as Billy and when I saw him I instantly knew I would call him Charlie, but a Twi thought never crossed my mind.
          Although I can be a little psychic (psycho, too) I’ve had a few dreams where things have happened and then I’ve had then happen inRL a few days later. Tia creeeepy.

          • Funny that, how a name can be in a face once you see it! Talking about psychic/psycho dreams, I have dreamt I met Rob in a drug store in Rome, where he was waiting for a prescription to be filled. Do you think this means it will happen IRL too? (Hoping, hoping…)

      • I got Ed pre-Twi; Charlie post-Twi. Charlie was named so because he looks exactly like a kitty I had who died at 6 months old who I had named Pierre but was going to name Charlie.

    • Your secred made me laugh! I still have that with any reference to Edward or Robert.

    • You’re cat was named Billy and then you changed it to Charlie?! No Iz not jealous! Why u ask?

    • I have a cat named Patterson, named many years before Twilight ever came out. Now in my head I think of him as Pattinson. I think this is the first piece of personal information I’ve revealed that someone could use to figure out my RL identity!

  2. I must say that I am guitly of the ‘Alice’ hair cut… And also guilty of getting my hair cut like Kristen’s VMA style (when she was hiding the mullet).

    I also miss the days when only a certain proportion of the population knew about Twilight. Though I may not have found LTT/LTR, which would be a massive shame.

    • Forgot to say that these ‘Twilight Secrets’ are hilarious. I love these posts.

    • I can’t agree with the knowing about twilight thing. I didn’t know about Twilight until Griffs introduced me to it back in Nov 2008. And the setting made me kick start my novel, so I owe a lot to Twilight, and to my sister (who is super awesome and runs 2 super awesome non-twi blogs…click on her name to go there: GriffsSayWhat; well actually they’re sort of Twi cuz they’re in Philly, and UC is from Philly, which to me is Twilight related. That’s normal right?)

    • Is it Normal that I brought a pic of UC (Moon? I always mix up who is who) to my stylist and asked for that cut?

      • Totes normal. And quite the compliment! Moon has longer, lightish brown hair and UC has shorter dark brown/blackish hair.

  3. that was HILAR. i don’t think i can determine if some of those were more embarrrrrrrrrasing than funny or if just REALLY honest!


  4. I love that last one – although, I have to say, I didn’t read the books until just before Twilight came out so I think I’m pretty late to the party.

    LOVE the animal crackers one! That sounds 100% like something I would do! I applaud you for your ingenuity!

    • It’s so defendable too! You’re just being an awesome mom and training the kid’s dexterity to that she/he becomes a great sports player (baseball player… vampire baseball… )

  5. Heres my seceret:
    When I first started reading Twilight, I used to assign projects to my students so we could go to the computer lab so I could read. I may or may not have convinced the librarian to let me skip the “holds” line in front of all the students so I could get the books first…

  6. “I love my Twi-BFF way more than my 20 year BFF”
    Ohhh the guilt…I havent spoken to her aaaages 😦

    Here’s a few secrets I had stashed away in the green bamboo…

    * Sometimes when we’re REALLY bored my fiance and I make up crack scenarios on how I’ll meet and befriend Tay…

    * I havent told my parents that the main reason I want to go to America is to see Eclipse with my Twi-BFFs.They think I’m rewarding myself for finishing college…

    *I feel like adding a teeny tiny Twilight detail to my wedding to see how many people pick up on it…Like little bottles on the table…or a thank you card with me and fiance doing a leg hitch with cardboard Edward…”We love your hideous gravy boat as much as we love a fade to black” (ok maybe that not so teeny tiny..twss)

    and NO! I dont harbour any other secrets *narrows eyes at doubters* no. secrets. at. all. lol

    Morning everybody!
    The hamster is sitting in a confessional… 🙂

    • Oh IWL! “We love your hideous gravy boat…!” Thank you…I needed that!
      Personally, I think that you should have mini Filet-O-Fish sandwiches as appetizers. Or, just have Olive Garden cater the whole thing!

      • That gravy boat comment was the best! I remember at my sister’s wedding our great aunt gave her a crystal punch bowl, “because everyone needs a crystal punch bowl for entertaining.” Griffs, did you sell it at the garage sale?

      • OMG! I went to a wedding that had Olive Garden cater it!!!!!!!!!!!! Truth! It was the cheapest wedding ever, they probably did the whole thing for less than $2,000. Of course the bride was the preacher’s daughter…so that and the church and the reception hall at said church were all free. And OG catering can’t be that much ‘cuz my water polo team used to get it for “pasta night”, and we didn’t have a big budget.

      • Poochi! You are too cool for words! I’d LOVE to have OG cater!!! It will be my ultimate tribute…(This could have been OUR wedding Tay…OUR WEDDING!) omg…Maybe I should have an Italian food section and call it the Olive Garden and put a cardboard Tay near it…(Finding a Big Daddy one is gonna be hard…twss) and little meat patties to go with the mini sandwiches…

        Ok I need to stop before my head explodes…or fiance breaks off the engagement…lol

    • My secret is that I would wanna go to such a wedding.

      • See? I thought the same thing. I have been married for ten years, so my days of having something like that are over. I mean, you know, not that I would…

        BUT, I would LOVE to see someone pull it off.
        All the granny’s saying ” why do they have apples sitting everywhere?”

        And everyone wearing just a hint of vampolicious or wolfolicious get up.

        Please, if anyone is planning a Twi wedding, can I come?

        • Mine is going to be outside and next to a craftsman style home… er, not that I’m engaged, so I’m not planning it obviously. If I do have apples, they will be more of the red/yellow harvest looking kind (fall wedding).

          But um, I’ll let you know 😉 You can only come if you promise to wear a wolf headress.

    • That leg hitch idea is awesome!

      ps-I didn’t know your foxy fiance knew about Tay!

    • Little bottles FTW! And have I told you lately that your fiance is amazing? ‘Cause he is.

      I believe you! No other secrets!

      Might I suggest jorts under your wedding dress?

      • Jorts under your wedding dress FTW!

      • JORTS! awesome! made me “lol” while I am at a meeting….haha

      • In lieu of the garter? Would a denim scrunchie work as a garter/jorts shoutout?

        • OH! that’s SO funny & bizzarly perfect…
          *searches for denim scrunchie from 1993*

          Any boby getting married?!
          something old – 1993
          something new – new to you
          something borrowed – from me
          something blue – ahem, denim anyone?
          something Twi-related! – a hint of Jorts!

        • Was just lurking but jorts under the wedding dress…I’ll be smiling all day. And I’ll never be able to go to another wedding without wondering…..

      • Spizz! he should NEVER know how amazing he is…I wanna keep him guessing my intentions till the very end…lol

        I really want to wear sneakers under my dress but jorts…oh the jorts! I’m gonna wear them for the ceremony and rip off the skirt (stripper style) to reveal them during the reception…I was thinking white denim with a sexy lace trim and TEAM FOX bedazzled on my ass and I MARRIED MY OTHER BFF on the white tee with cartoon abbage for the cabbage on it…

        You can see I have too much time on my hands… 😉

  7. these are so funny! the youtube one and the bffs one hit close to home. i may or may not have a twilight twitter and lj, and luckily, my 22 yr bff IS my twi-bff, otherwise no one but you guys would get my jokes. ever.

    p.s. i know this would defeat the secretness, but the i’d love to see more work from the artist responsible for the second-to-last-one.
    i like their drawing style!

  8. I’m guilty of loving my Twi-BFF the most out of all my other friends.

    Confession – I think I love my LTT-Twi-BFF even more than my local-Twi-BFF who I actually live in the same city with and see all the time. She’s just not as Normal as us. But, shhhh…don’t tell her. K?

    • It’s cool. We get it. Meaning that we get why you prefer the Normal people here over her. That’s the whole reason I brought Griffs to this site… so we could bond on a whole new level.

      • Normal people rule. Other people drool.

        • When I was 7 I was at gymnastics camp and the local news came to cover it for a human interest piece and they had me say, “Girls rule and boys drool.”
          Hm, i wonder if I can put that on my acting resume…

          • Sure. Put that you invented that saying. Everyone’s guilty of “exaggerating” on their resume.

      • I’ve tried to get my local-Twi-BFF into LTT…but she’s just not as committed as I am. Although, she did give me a present for Christmas that was purple. And by purple, I mean actually purple in color. Oh, and it was cool too.

  9. Those are amazing! The first one definitely could be mine… Peter’s such a tease. I’m sure I have a lot of Twi-Secrets, most involving fanfic, though I can’t think of anything too juicy right now. But, here’s a disturbing one:

    I feel like a horrible fan because I didn’t know until the Rubik’s cube pic that Jackson Rathbone was colorblind. How did I not know that!?!

    • I didn’t know that either. Does that make me a horrible fan, too? 😦
      But on the other hand, think of all the trivia you DO know that is Twilight-related! I am sure it far outstrips your knowledge of say names of wild flowers, how to cook an egg-plant or flight schedules LA-NY? 😉

      • Thanks! You’ve made me feel a little better! I DO know a lot of useless Twi-trivia. (Though, I refrained from buying a Twilight trivia game I saw at Walgreens a couple days ago…)

        • @Tuesday – OK, here’s a secret. I HAVE that Twilight trivia game you saw at Walgreens.

          • I have SceneIT Twilight edition. There, I said it.

          • OH, I got Twilight SceneIt for Christmas from my sis in law. My husband refuses to play it. So my neighbor and I tear it down. When you win you get to go to the prom with Edward.

            I did have a Twilight fail, tho, when I was looking at the pieces, I said, “why do they have the Epcot statue as a piece in a Twilight game?”

            My husband, brills as ever, says, “Because it’s a baseball”

            Smart ass

          • @Ang Here’s another secret. I’m jealous! And we should totally play it some time.

          • @abs…OUTLOUD. (Ok, that would have been funnier if it could have been located directly below your post.)

            @tuesday – It’s on!

  10. I looooooooovvvvvvveeee secrets.

    I get to go to a postsecret event. I never get to go to anything awesome so I am totally bragging to anyone and everyone.

    My secret(s).

    I read fanfic and skim most of the lemons. I really do read them for the story but no one believes me.

    I love a couple of my online besties as much as my real life friends. ❤

    • Another secret — I have no idea what the eff lemons mean in fanfic. I don’t have enough time to read fanfic though I wish I did.

    • I don’t believe you either. :p

      • See? No one believes.

        I do read some of it but most of it is been there, done that. It’s gotta be something off the wall for me to get interested.

        And I find nothing hawt about Edward saying “You’re so tight around my cock.”

        Really? Who says that?! Maybe I’m just weird.

        PS I feel like one of those dudes who say they read Playboy for the articles. HA!

        • Actually Playboy has really good articles. It’s fairly notorious for that.

        • I believe you!! I don’t care for the ones that are just gratuitous sex- I find them the most forgettable. However, a nice little addition here and there is nice. *blush*

    • Yay for you! I’m so excited on your behalf! Verah cool.

      Siiiigh. I believe you, and agree with skipping some of the lemons. There are some things I will never be able to erase from my memory, unfortunately, and they weren’t even slash. Gah.

      • I still wanna throw up from the Puck/Coach Tanaka slash I read.

        So sick.

      • “There are some things I will never be able to erase from my memory, unfortunately, and they weren’t even slash. Gah” Gah indeed!!!

        I know that you know that I read lemons…that makes me cringe…I feel like I should be apologising to you guys and praying for my soul after every chapter… 😦

  11. This is awesome! Oooh, I have so many Twilight secrets that I can’t share with anyone – because then they wouldn’t be secrets anymore! (Plus I would be ostracised from all “normal” society if they got out..)
    I am still hiding in the back of the closet..sorry!

  12. I tell my RL friends I don’t have a Twitter account. That is my sacred Twispace where I am allowed to obsess over all things Twi and Twirelated in relative anonymity and peace, free from shame and embarassment.

    I named my son before I knew Twilight existed but think it may be serendipity that his name is Charlie, who happens to be my favorite character in the movies.

    • SAME! And I totally act like I know nothing about ‘The Twitter’.

    • I have 2 twitter accounts and 2 email accounts. Solely because of this blog. And I made Griffs swear she wouldn’t talk about Twilight to me directly on my RL twitter.

  13. And on the rubik’s cube secret, I totes thought she was going to say “I almost bought it for Jackson b/c I know he is stupid.” OOPS!! He’s colorblind? Learn something new every day.

    And I know for a fact that Jackson isn’t stupid. At least he didn’t appear to be when I met him after hanging around a parking lot in my ((minivan)) with 3 of my mom friends for an hour and a half waiting for him to come out after his Monkey show. Another secret revealed…I’m a little first hand embarassed about that one.

  14. I love Twilight Secrets! I guess you know when you’re a Twilight fan when none of these sound too outlandish to you.

    Here’s my Twi-not-so-secret:When my husband calls home during the day asks what I’m doing (conversationally, not in a keeping tabs kind of way), I usually say I’m doing laundry or cooking, when typically I’m reading fanfic and scramble at the end of the day to get everything else done.

    • love it! I do this too, but not just with Twilight things. I will be reading stuff online, or watching TV or whatever and then when I hear my husband come up I jump up and pretend I was in the kitchen the whole time doing dishes etc. sneeky sneeky! 😉

    • LOL- this happened to me to, yesterday. It was pouring rain and I was *working* from home… so I watched TWI on the big screen. When I heard the garage door open, I flew off the couch and scrambled to turn everything off. I got caught though.. left my cell in there and a cold drink. I claimed the warm spot on the couch from the dogs.

  15. Yay! I’m not the only one with dirty little Twisecrets! The hubby recently bought me one of those little laptop tables because he was “afraid the thing would become permanently fused to my thighs.”
    My secret?
    I might have written a little fanfic…

  16. I know someone who named her cats Edward and Esme. I shouldn’t be surprised… her other cats are Ron and Hermione.

    She’s single.

    • Well, your cats are named Buster and George Michael, so you are hardly in a position to judge….

      • You kid, but my dog is actually named Toby, which I jokingly say is short for Tobias.

        Also, if I had cats I would TOTALLY name them after AD characters. You’ve successfully proved my lameness. Well done, LPB. Well done.

        • HAHAHAHAHA! You ladies are killing me! I just lost my cat, and when I decide to get another, it shall be named Maeby! Love your faces for this!

          • Nothing wrong with that!

          • I actually think that’s an AWESOME name for a cat. I would have a tough time deciding between that and Lucille, I think. Or maybe Mr. F… Oh god, I need to stop because this could easily get out of hand.

            OH. One more. This one’s a no-brainer. If I had a bird, it’d be Mrs. Featherbottom. “Who’d like a banger in the mouth?”

            Ok, I’m done now.

          • Maeby, That is brilliant!! What a great name. Love it.

        • NO WAY! I have totally proved your awesomeness!

  17. My secret: While we were on a romantic getaway for our 4-year anniversary last year, I kept waiting for my bf to go to the bathroom/take a shower and once asked him to go pick up dinner because I “didnt feel like leaving the room” … so I could pull out my laptop and read Midnight Sun!!

    Luckily, I dont have to hide my obsession (from him) anymore — he got me all 4 action figures from New Moon for xmas!!! And is it just me or do all of those action figures look “special” … they remind me of the Gumbys from Monty Python sketches… anyone?

    • Yes, and NM Pocket Edward looks like he should be on Jersey Shore.

      • Great idea for a crossover…vamps attack the Jersey Shore and the Cullens must infiltrate to protect them. Snooki is the first to go…is it sad that I know who she is and am irritated by her and I dont even watch the show??!!?

        • Not sad at all, I don’t watch it, either, and she irritates me! We should ask The Font to put a bug in the producer’s ear about this , , , since he is really The Situation.

          Gah. I am further irritated that I know who The Situation is, and that many of the celebs I like are taking pictures with these ppl. Stop the madness!

          • I seriously immediately thought of The Font when Jersey Shore was mentioned. Plus they’re on the cover of one of those Check-Out Line mags (as I like to collectively call them) all in royal blue shirts, and I was like, “OMG! It’s The Font!”

            So, I’m going to admit to my worse TwiSecret now. One of my quiet aspirations is to be on the cover of the Check-out Line mags with Cuddley and the headline, “They’re Dating! And Charlie’s Pissed!” ::face paw::

        • This is what Jersey Shore vamps would look like (warning; you may need some brain bleach after viewing this):

        • apologies if this ends up double posting.
          This is what it would look like if vamps attacked Jersey Shore (and again, I warn you that you may need brain bleach after viewing):

      • Quite the situation.

      • Hahahahaha! ❤ you for this.

  18. My husband and i occasionally argue about my obsession with “twilight”. He says I’m actually obsessed with rob, I say I’m not, that it’s all things twilight I love. I’m obsessed with rob.

  19. If I would have a babygirl, she might be named Alice. I think this is why god didn’t give me a boyfriend right now.

    • omg. i just had this moment where I thought, “Wait, you’re going to name your daughter after yourself? Won’t that get confusing? Will she go by her middle name.” Then i remembered Alice isn’t your real name.

      • That happens to me too.

        • Haha, I’m glad it’s not just me! My head turns whenever I hear someone say the word “tuesday.” I guess that’s another Twi-secret.

          • I’m amazed at how often the word “abs” is said in everyday RL. I’ve almost called the boyfriend “Mr. Abs” to his face once or twice. Oh well, at least I haven’t called him Rob by accident. That wouldn’t be good.

          • This guy I work with is named Seth. So when he messages me on Office Communicator I always have a moment of confusion. Thankfully everyone calls me “TS” and not Seth.

  20. oh my gosh – i have a wedding to go to, which caused our Comic Con trip plans to be cancelled too!!! I am SO disappointed, but obviously can’t explain that to my friend who is getting married.

    my only hope is twilight will have representation there in 2011!!

  21. I have a secret Twi-twitter and once mistakenly blurted out that I follow PFach on Twitter to my non-Twifriends. Some of them got enthusiastic and created Twitter accounts. I had to make a RL Twitter account -that I hardly ever update now- just to cover up the tracks.

    I love the one-but-last one’s drawing. At least now that it’s on LTT there’s a good chance Stephenie might see it. Your good deed of the day, UC!

  22. Love these posts. My secret: when my fiance comes in from freezing weather and touches me with his cold hands… i can’t help but think that’s what Edward feels like.

    Another secret: I have the same last name as one of the actors and I like to pretend he’s family….but only in my head lol.

  23. My twi secret at the moment is that my colleague is telling me a story and all I want her to do is shut up so I can read this blog.

  24. My secret is that this is ALL a secret! I read and comment on Twilight blogs almost every day, and chat with people I met there on Twitter and Skype. I know it will all come out one day when I MUST take a trip somewhere to meet my online comrades, but I’ll cross that bridge when i get to it….Most people who know me in RL already think I am a little nutty, so nothing will surprise them too much. My problem is, that I am a little older than a lot of y’all, so many of my friends (most) are completely techno-tarded, and will never understand making friends with people online. They are the types who think all online chats are with Pedophiles. Well, some of you are, but I’m not pointing any fingers…. 😉

  25. Okay, so second TwiSecret: I came out to my coworkers who sit around me. They all know. They see me on LTT every day, they saw my Charlie NM shirt, they giggled at the bags under my eyes when I dragged in at 7:45am after going to the midnight showing, they’ve all visited my Kate blog, they’re not surprised when they look over at my screen and there’s a million thumbnails of some scruffy guy named Billy Burke staring back at them. The best part? I discovered a unicorn in the process. And unlike most unicorns, he’s hardcore Team Edward.

    Twisecret #3: One of the things that really makes me happy each day is posting the Charlies images on here. I like knowing that I bring diurnal joy to tuesday, mountainlion, and [now] lulu! (ps-I liked will estes too.). I also think about how Tuesday and I have the same tastes in TwiMen and how glorious that is.

    TwiSecret #4: I get the same feeling that Fang gets about lemons when I look at pappz photos of Daniel Cudmore and Charlie Bewley. I feel like I’m being intrusive and quickly look away (except that I do post some on here cuz I’m quickly running out of photos)

    btw, does CafePress have a “They’re NOT bears” shirt? Cuz if not they need to get on that.

    • Aw, I love you, TS. I look forward to your BB and Charlie (and Dan – now especially b/c of the freckles) pics everyday! And that’s no secret. 😉

  26. Here is my secret: I have been reading this site and all its glorious comments every single day since this summer, but have never commented! Coming here is what I think about in the morning as I walk to work, and I especially look forward to it on Mondays so I have more entries to read from over the weekend! I also love going back over really old posts and re-reading them so they are almost like new again. So this is a big week of first times – yesterday I wrote a letter, today I comment – I have gone from virgin to slut in under 24 hours and am really happy about it!

    • You always managed to choose the best handle name EVAR!

      • Oh my gosh – it feels like Christmas, or Bella’s birthday before the papercut – I am so excited to be a legit member of this “elite” club now! I have loved you from afar for so long, and now I’m in! (that’s what HE said)!

        • He did say that in poochimama’s FF.

          Glad you’ve emerged

        • um btw, i meant “also” not “always”

          • I figured that’s what you meant. OH – another secret – totally have never read fanfic and totally want to…probably should draw the line there though, of stuff I am willing to risk looking at on my work computer…

            I like you, TeamSeth. You have been consistently one of my favorite commenters since I first found out about this place! It’s like you guys are all celebrities to me and now I am getting the chance to “talk” to you! Geez, could I sound more lame?!?!?! Probably – it’s only my first day…look out!

          • That’s so sweet! Sweetest thing I’ve heard all day (certainly sweeter than my boss telling I have to stay late…grumble grumble). Do you twitter?! Do you have a blog?! Have you seen my blog?! Can we be besties?!

            Ok, calming down.

            It’s not lame at all! Besides the fact that we’re on a TwiHard site that we’re too embarrassed to tell anyone about… speaking of FF and LTT celebrity status, would the screenplay about LTT I’m planning to write be considered FF?

          • Oh Gawd, DJTanner.

            Don’t inflate TS’s ego anymore!

            We can’t handle it!


        • DJ – That’s totes how I felt too when I finally started commenting! It’s so much fun!
          I haven’t really made any friends here yet, as most of the others have done, but there are several people who stand out to me that I would like to be friends with, lol. It feels so High School or something. Actually, if anyone watches the show Community (which is hilarious btw), last week’s episode which featured Jack Black as a guest, completely epitomized this feeling of watching the awesomeness from the outside.

          P.S. I promise not to kick anyone in the face.

          • HAHA!!!!!!!!!! That face kick was the best – and yes, I can totally relate. What if you meet someone from LTT in real life and it turns out to be someone you already know and don’t like, but then you become besties?

          • I’ll be your fwend Luludee…I dont really stand out and I’m a bit of a Fez/ Newton sitting in the corner of the cafeteria mumbling about how jealous I am of the fabulous Cullen kids (which you are) but I promise to keep my “I ❤ Luludee like a fake lesbian" shirt in the closet and not word vomit about speedo padding in case you decide to take me to the cool table. Whaddaya say? 😀

          • Yay, sounds like a great plan IWL!!!!
            And you definitely DO stand out here, in a good way of course 😉
            I love your fun comments and I loved your recent letter and I love the fact that you’re from NZ. You get automatic cool points for that in my book, lol… may or may not be because I automatically associate you with Flight of the Conchords….and maybe LOTR.

    • Being a slut is nice, isn’t it?

      • For serious!

      • PS You have also been one of my favorites – like, I’m talking within the Top 3 of the folks who make me laugh and spit all over my monitor on a regular basis…

        • Oh no!

          Don’t inflate my ego either!

          They can’t handle me when I think I’m awesome. 😉

          If you twitter, tell me your name. I’ll follow you.

          • If I had one I would tell you, but alas, I do not…but obviously Twilight has got me doing things I never thought I would ever do, i.e. compulsively reading blogs, lusting after jailbait, etc., so perhaps one day I too will join the legions of Twitterheads. I’m still trying to figure out how to get an avatar up in this place…

            There should be some sort of LTT map, where you can see how many LTTrs are in your area – sort of like the Megan’s Law website, only for Normal people…

    • Welcome to Twi-slut-dom! So happy you decided to emerge from lurkdom… feels good, doesn’t it? 😉

      • Thank you! I only wish I had joined in on this earlier instead of lurking like a creeper for so many months!

  27. My Twi-secret for TODAY shall be that LTT/LTR are the first sites I check in the morning, which is also the busiest time in my workday. Many, many, manymanymany times I have carried on entire conversations with the Boss (who is hanging out in my office) about Important Things, all while typing out comments or tweets to my Twifriends. He undoubtedly thinks I am working on . . . well, work.

    OH, I also share a common Twi-secret: the friends I’ve made through this site are dearer than most of my RL friends, and some I would even hug for longer than 2.5 minutes.

    • Longer than 2.5 minutes? I think that’d make me uncomfortable… and I like hugging. Would there be the hand drop down the back all Bella/Jacob in her bedroom style?

    • Can I sign up for a 15.6 second hug?

      Cause I know you wanna hug me and try to touch my boobs, you hawt little mulleted vampire.

    • I’d take the that 2.5 minute hug as long as you dont distract me with peanut butter and bananas….on second thoughts, that might be the only way you’ll stop me at 2.5 minutes… I have abandonment issues…lol

  28. “I buckled my kid in his high chair and gave him a pile of animal crackers so I could watch the NM trailer in peace” ROTFLMAO!

  29. Where’s Cyndi?

  30. I LOL’d at the one about my BFF vs. my Twi-BFF.

    I’m lucky that the two of them are BOTH Twi-BFFs. Such a great feeling to geek out with them and know that I’m not alone in my fangirl qualities.

    • Oh. my. I love you, TS, you great enabler you! I may need a sub-subfolder for Billy smirking photos. *Wipes drool.* Also, I don’t know if I’ve told you this before, but Dan + Glasses = A happy tuesday.

    • wow, Wow, and WOW!

      BB with the baby was precious.

      And oh, Bewley, those eyes!!

    • TS, Thanks so much!

      I love BB in black. Baby photo is cute, too, but back to Billy…the scruff on his face kills me.


  31. My confession for the day is that I went to the pharmacy at lunch to get a birthday card for my BFF in California. She likes Twi (thanks to me) but is not “Normal” like we are. Anyways, there was a “funny card” that has pictures of bears on the cover. I opened it, automatically hoping that somehow inside it would be written “They’re NOT bears!” Unfortunately it had something lame like “Have a beary good Birthday”. At that point I considered buying the card, crossing out the message, and writing in “They’re NOT bears!” But then, I realized it was my LTT BFFs who would get it, not her. So I am sending you all a virtual “They’re NOT bears!” card right now. Have a beary good day.

  32. Love the post and comments today. I’m off work today and feel like I can really enjoy all the glory that is LTT

    My Twi-secrets/embarrassments are mostly related to my hubby. He is a writer and does all kinds of blogs and podcasts and stuff online, and I never comment on them or download his stuff, BUT I read this blog everyday and comment frequently. I signed up for a Twitter account just to follow LTT.

    Also, I tried to keep my fanfic reading a secret but eventually he found out, when I would be “reading something” on my iPhone in bed at night. He was totally second-hand embarrassed.

    Hey TS, aren’t you missing a certain AMAZING Welsh actor in the pics above?

  33. On a completely unrelated note, what in the HALE is wrong with twitter?

    Am I supposed to actually work or something?!?!!?


  34. These are hysterical and presented in such a way I want to print all these up and hang them on the frig!

    #1-Just before Christmas I got so used to seeing Twilight merch at stores/mags in grocery store that when I took my toddler to Chuck E. Cheeses 2 weeks ago I looked through the prize section for Twilight stuff and felt disappointed when there wasn’t any.

    #2-I work from home. One Sunday I sent hubby and toddler off to a children’s party w/o me b/c I had too much work to do–I did 1 hour of work and spent 4 hours reading fanfiction. Everyone felt bad I was so crammed down with work.

    #3-One morning hubby woke up and I realized his hair was sticking up like VF Rob cover pic and after 8+ years I had never wanted him more!!!

    fyi: Look up lemons on Wikipedia or Google “The Lemon Song” for the lemon explanation

    • OH MY GOODNESS!!! funny… i love #3, my hubby makes one of the faces Rob make as Edward in the movies, and when he does it i swoon a little on the inside… but only since i recently made that connection… shame on me!

    • #1 … YES! It’s like it all just disappeared now. 😦

    • I’m still confused on the lemons thing.

      • For some reason when there’s a sex scene in a fanfic they call it a lemon. I have no idea why and I am thoroughly ashamed of myself for knowing this.

      • Someone on another site explained it started a long time ago with a smutty manga called “Lemon Cream” or something like that. I can’t remember the whole story and am too lazy to go look for it. I don’t think it relates to the Led Zeppelin song, although that’s what I thought the first time I heard the term, too.

  35. i think that one about running two twi sites was made just for me. too bad it’s not really a secret any more………..

  36. The eating one is so cool. The dark side of the moon would be a good tweet. You gotta love those words. Or better Yet David Bowie ground control to major tong ..

  37. Secrets:
    -My 3 year old daughter (Mary) wants me to call her “Pam”… I want to play too, so I have her call me “Alice”.

    -I have the Alice haircut

    -I bought the Luna Twilight lip gloss at Nordstroms (it’s great BTW).

  38. Since discovering LTT I’ve realised that most of my deep dark secrets re:Twilight are actually quite normal. Like –

    1.Spending the whole day at work getting to know LTT site when boss was away, in his office, including lunch break. That’s normal.

    2.Knowing ridiculously obscure facts about everything Twi-related eg. T. Lautner’s house burnt down when he was 2 and he he used to bite other kids at daycare- what a scamp! Ok starting to get a little scary, but still normal.

    3.Workmate & I excitedly breaking down New Moon movie esp. buffed up Jacob when I realised she thought Taylor was 19 in real life. Ooops. Talk about 2nd hand embarrased for her being delusional and 1st hand embarrased for me knowing the truth! Still have not been game enough to burst her bubble.

    4. Am typing this from boss’s office, golf day.

    PS I think I want to get married just so I can wear wedding jorts. But that’s normal?

  39. Everyone knows I love Twilight even if I am 31, and that´s totally fine with me. Boyfriend knows I check Twi- and Robsites everyday – and thinks it´s not very cool – but still ok.
    BUT my secret that NOBODY knows is that I read immense amounts of fanfiction. I actually stay up every night for at least two or three extra hours reading fanfic! I must have read at least 100 by now. And even if some are really good, most of them are so x-rated I´m so ashamed I can´t tell anyone, even my friends who are into Twilight themselves.
    AND I never have an explanation why I am always tired or why I haven´t read any new books lately even if I always say “I stayed up late reading” …

    • Umm. So this is kind of embarassing but here it goes…I’ve been having a hard time sleeping. As in not sleeping at all. So I was talking to my mom about this and she told me that she encountered something like this when her HORMONES were thrown way off balance. I told her I was just going through some weird sleep patern but the part of my brain that processes all things Twilight was screaming ‘TOO MANY M RATED FANFICS”!!!!

  40. My secret is….

    Everytime I think about trying to quit smoking, I see a pic of Rob with a cigarette and I just can’t do it.

    I’m aware of how bad it is but he just looks so damn sexy!!

    • Damn that sexy man! I had my very first puff this year and I didnt crave it at all…but when I see Rob doing it I feel like It should be my new bad habit…(after biting my nails that is) He should come with a warning…

  41. This is awesome. Loved the last one.

    Is it reeaaallly weird that I’m reading Breaking Dawn for the 500th time, and I have “Reproduction” from Greece 2 in my head from doing so?

    • I too am on my 500th read of BD – which leads me to another secret: Sometimes when I am hanging out with some non-Twi friends I am secretly looking forward to going home and reading about feathers and imprinting and bloody vamp baby births.

  42. Hee. Name the cats Buttcrack and Santa. Meeow!

  43. One more secret. The pastor at my church’s name is Rob. Every time I see his name come up on my cell in a text or a phone call, I get a tiny thrill b/c “Rob” is calling me. Then I realize it’s just my spiritual advisor and the thrill is gone.

  44. My Twi secret- most people know that I am fairly obsessed (read: Normal) with Twilight stuff, but very few know that I comment almost daily on a Twi blog. And I’m also friends with LTT on facebook. Totally Normal…

    • Oh, and I know (not in a creepy way) that a lot of the regular posters are from the East Coast or time zones further east, so as a West Coast reader I should post before the end of my day if I want people to see it. (and I just got an avatar. go me!)

      • I come back and read. And you usually post earlier on, right? I’m all free floating time zone now. Sigh.

        • I try, but I take morning classes so that I have afternoons free and sometimes those free afternoons are very busy. Sigh.

  45. I secretly loved that Rob once told Kristen that her cat will die. I truely can’t stand cats (even though I own one. Long story) and only put up with them when I have to.

    I’ve given some serious thought in starting a secret Twitter account so I can add all the cast members etc.

    Also, on my 24th b-day my dad asked me what I wanted to do and I said go to the movies. I purposely timed it so the only movie playing was New Moon, unless we wanted to wait 45 min for something else. I lied to him and said I hadn’t seen it before.

  46. I completely agree with the one about missing the days where only a few people knew about Twilight…I love it and all but I realy wish it stayed little

  47. […] Twilight Secrets: Everyone still has one Dear Twilight Secret Keepers, I love hearing your secrets! […]

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