Is Twilight about real vampires?

Real Vampires. No Thank you

Real Vampires. No Thank you

Dear Twilight-lovers,

For today’s Tuesday Twilosophy, let me set the scene with a conversation I recently had with my husband:

Me: What movie are we watching?
Him: Interview with a Vampire since you’ve never seen it.
Me: No! I can’t! I didn’t finish the book
Him: You never will
Me: Well…. I don’t really like vampires….
Him: (gives me ‘the look.’ Let me define this look as one which says “are you f*cking kidding me? You’ve spent the last 7 months of OUR lives devoted to writing about them daily”)
Me: Well, I don’t like real vampires…

It’s true. I don’t. I never once read about a vampire or watched a movie with a vampire before Twilight. My only connection to the world of vampires before August of 2008 was Count Chocula cereal. And after Twilight was recommended to me and I bought the first book without knowing anything about it because I was desperate for a quick read for my beach vacation, I read those now infamous lines on the back of the cover:

About three things I was absolutely positive. First, Edward was a vampire.

And I stopped. “Vampire? What the hell was Jess thinking recommending this book to me?” And I continued:

Second, there was part of him — and I didn’t know how potent that part might be — that thirsted for my blood. And third, I was unconditionally and irrevocably in love with him.

Okay the last line peaked my interest a little bit. But not enough to overlook the vampire part. So what did I do? Yep- you got it- I read Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants book two instead.

Read on about how I don’t like Vampires after the jump

Fake, sexy vampires. Yes please

Fake, sexy vampire. Yes please

After growing extremely depressed over the realization that made-up girls in smelly, dirty old pants lead a more exotic, exciting life than I do, and I had nothing else to read, I gave in and read Twilight. And I fell in love with Edward. And then with Alice and finally with Harry Clearwater. (It was his fish fry that won my heart- I cannot resist a man with the ability to fry up his latest catch.) But I stand by what I said to my husband, I don’t like real vampires.

You cannot tell me that the sparkly Cullen family are real vamps. Again, I don’t have a lot of vampire knowledge since my only experience is with a chocolaty-delicious cereal, but I’ve heard and read enough to know what I believe. So this leads me to my next questions: Would we love Edward as much if he were a different mythical creature? What if he were an elf? Or a Hippogriff? Or a Unicorn? Or what if Edward was the werewolf and Jacob was the vampire? Would the story work in any other way?

And can real vampire fans actually like Twilight? I don’t mean fans of vampires like Bill Compton from True Blood/The Sookie Stackhouse series. To me, while he acts more on his evil ‘vampiristic’ qualities than Edward, he’s still just a mythical creature looking for a human lady to get freaky with. I mean fans of Vamps that kill without a second thought- tossing bodies out of the way and occasionally stopping to create a companion- Evil, sadistic creatures. People like them! And those people aren’t me.

So…Do you like vampires? Should the Cullen family be taken serious in the vampire-world? Do we only like Edward because he is a vampire? Would we like him as an elf? Or a, ugh, werewolf!? And is it blasphemous that I run a blog such as this but still confess that I don’t even like real vampires?

Hopeless addicted to fake vampires,

See past Twilosophy entries here

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133 Responses

  1. Gotta say it, I am a fan of MANY vampires…

    But I tend to stick with the ones who pick good over evil, humanity/soul over monster-dom… =D

  2. this is me! not you UC!
    cuz I dont like real vampires either… & when someone asks me about creepy things I got scared… cuz I fell for Edward, for the love story I´ve got no idea if I would love him as another mythical creature, as a human I think so (I´ve read too many ffs to think of him that way).

    just seeig tom cruise as a vampire with fangs creeps me out!

  3. Yeah, so Edward isn’t my first vampire. I’ve always loved vampires, especially Anne Rice’s Louis.

    SMeyer’s vamps are definitely different. I love that she created something new. I’ve been working on an article for my blog about that very topic for a while now. If only I had time to sit down and think about it now. Bed time for me!

  4. I think that the Cullens are real vampires! The vampires of earlier books and movies are more like animals. Even though I love the other books the Twilight series is more easy th relate to. I love that they can only be killed by riping apart. Real vampres are supposed to be almost invinceable. I don’t like it when they are killed by stakes,garlic and croses. It makes them seam lke they are weaker than humans.

    If the Cullens were elfs or werewolfs it wouldn’t really matter. Edward would be supper sexy eather way. There would be a lot more danger if he were a wolf though. I reall wouldn’t to make him mad.

  5. i luv real vampires! By far my fav vampire movie has to b Queen of the Damned! … i totally recommend it. BUT.. i love me some twilight saga!!! i love the Cullens and their vegetarian ways :]

  6. i am a huge fan of *real* vampires. i can’t bring myself to consider twilight vamps the real thing, but i can appreciate the love story that smeyer has created. i consider the twilight saga to be an entertaining love story, not a series of vampire novels.

    if edward were anything else, he wouldn’t have that “je ne sais quois” that we love so much! his perfect diamond exterior is what drew us all in in the first place.

  7. […] thinks of Edward Cullen in the first place. They are NOT the same. Twilight is NOT a vampire story. I don’t even like vampires! So Stephen, I heart you as Bill, and Rob, I heart you as Rob (oh and as Edward). End of […]

  8. I read a part of the book and I believe that Meyer’s inspiration for make Edward Cullen was a Whedon’s vampire, Angel (played by David Boreanaz). If you see, Edward has almost the same problems than Angels and how she discribes Edward’s body is more like Boreanaz, not Pattinson. I believe Meyer tried something in Buffy/Angel’s style, and for now worked, but the real Whedon’s fans notice similarity and we know as in a fight Buffy and Angel win with eyes closed easily.
    First of all, I really liked Twilight saga, but I saw the similarity and I think with myself: “Okay! It is a good history of love, a beautiful love. But what Buffy Summers (the slayer) and Angel (the hot vampire) have is an immortal love, forever just like ‘I will remember you!’, so forget Twilight, Buffy and Angel are better!!!”
    However, Twilight saga has an impact in people and I respect that, but don’t ask me to love and prefer Meyer’s. I don’t hate, I just prefer Whedon’s.

  9. […] Press for (Photo 5 via (Photo 6 via (Photo 7 via (Photo 9 via (Photo 10 via By […]

  10. I always love anything and everything about vampire, fake or no fake. I remember quite well how I had a crush on Anne Rice’s Lestat, and now I can’t seem to get over Edward Cullen, and I am over 30. OMG! I think I’m going mad, again!

  11. […] thinks of Edward Cullen in the first place. They are NOT the same. Twilight is NOT a vampire story. I don’t even like vampires! So Stephen, I heart you as Bill, and Rob, I heart you as Rob (oh and as Edward). End of story.5. […]

  12. No, Twilight is not about real vampires, it is about gay ones. And dumb ones. AND EDWARD FUCK*NG CULLEN IS NOT SEXY!

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