A Haiku for KStew

KStew someone loves you!

KStew someone loves you!

Dear Kristen-

As you know, this past weekend Moon & I were together in LA with my husband and his best friend (the bff).  We dragged their butts all over LA and made them sit in the back of the 2 door car Moon drives. We loved every minute of our girl-power.

We were shocked on Saturday night because they agreed to watch Twilight with us if we promised to stop at the liquor store first. Many beers, gin & tonics and champagne toasts later, we started the movie. The bff was actually excited to see the movie because “that hot indie chick from Into the Wild is in it.” (Don’t worry- we didn’t tell him you’re a fake lesbian)

Ya know that part when James jumps onto the boat right before the bad vamps kill Buttcrack Santa? Well, Waylon asks “Who are you?” and James appears.  My husband announced that the bff looks like James.  And he’s right. We rewound that part and had a lot of laughs imagining the bff answering Waylon’s fearful “Who are you” with his name instead. It was funny. Believe us.

After the movie ended we asked what the guys thought, and the bff declared: “I’m going to write Kristen a haiku.” [Just a little FYI- the bff is an artist- a songwriter, a poet, (and apparently a wandering vampire) and he likes to respond to text messages in haiku. So this wasn’t a very strange declaration (well, it’s a little strange b/c no one ever thought anyone would write you a haiku, and well, okay. It’s also strange because.. who writes haikus?)] And he wrote one. On the spot. He’s that good.

He'll 'track' you down girl

He'll 'track' you down girl

A vampire I’m not
But in love with you I am
(Edward is a tool)

The bff actually sent us a bunch of haikus to choose from, and we thought we’d share one per week. We’re so cruel to you half the time (you deserve it) that we thought we’d show you something nice written by your friendly neighborhood nomad vampire male fan.

Hugs & Haikus,
UC, Moon & the Bff

*Do you have the hots for the bff? Wanna hear more from the creator of the amazing haiku? Well, check out his band because we love them and promised him TONS of new fans in exchange for plastering his face on a Twilight blog. No seriously, they’re good. You can say you knew him when he was “just a guy writing haikus” Far Beyond Frail

37 Responses

  1. Oh wow he does really look like james. Edward is a tool!! Sounds like my husband.
    Good for you two to get them to actually watch it with you!! My husband watches it but every two seconds says something to either try to ruin it or make me bust out laughing. The first time we watched it after I got my dvd he kept singing “Hot n Cold” because it reminded him of the hillywood show. I lost it laughing. I swear he is set out to ruin the movies and the books for me though. haha

  2. He does look like James.

  3. … and K. Stew seriously looks stoned in the pic you chose. Lit.

  4. I love how he linked back to you guys in his page and said go there “I won’t tell anyone”.LOL

  5. I love it!

    The girl power. The James-look-alike BFF. The haikus.

    When’s the next haiku?


  6. A hottie he is
    and worthy K stew is not
    but that haiku rocks

    LOL I think I did that right!

    • Vickyb PERFECT. ur a haiku expert!

      • blushing now for sure
        although wish it was Rob’s lips
        that made me feel so

        Wow, now I know why your hubby bff likes to reply in haiku.
        I could get used to this. But I won’t 🙂

        • ok now you’re just showing off! 🙂

          • Me? Never! Plus when I found out about all the talented girlz here
            on LTT/LTR I had to step up my game 🙂 I hear we have some songbirds
            here. I offered Mrs. P and UC (and you of course) to start a girl band and I
            will be your manager (like Nick) and make sure you get to open up for Rpattz
            when he goes on tour srsly!

          • I would totally sing with u ladies…..I don’t sing often, but that is how much I love u, I would totally get over myself and sing with u, if u wanted to.

            I hope you understand that I don’t just say that to everyone…

    • your haiku reminds me of Yoda!! LOL

  7. Loving the haiku! I love Kris too. ^^
    I possess Kris love
    Myself is not the only one
    Edward love us both


  8. But does he have James’ (Cam’s whatever) abs?

    See how I always find a way to really get to the heart of the matter? You love me. You do.

  9. wow…hat man is talented!! not only did he write something nice about Kstew he managed to do it in haiku form *bows down to his greatness(or craziness…whatevs)*

  10. Wow he’s hot. And he does look like Cam :). I’ve gotten a couple guys to watch Twilight, if only for the ballet scene.

  11. Well my my BFF certainly can pull off the hot vampire look can’t he!!! 😉

    • I’ve been practicing my “hot vampire” pose for years. Who knew it would finally come in handy?

      • You really are brilliant…Didn’t waste anytime on B.S., but went straight to what you knew would kill the ladeez!!…You’ve got your hip cocked, a deadly come hither stare, not to mention the hands in the pockets (I’m sure I read a body language article having to do with that exact hand placement….hmmm…something about pointing to…uh ah..nevermind…) Let’s just say that it was time well spent!!

  12. huh. maybe if his band tours PA i will have to check it out. 🙂

  13. LMAO! YOUR MAN IS FUNNY! awesome i can’t wait to read all of the fab haikus.. LMAO

  14. LMAO! YOUR MAN IS FUNNY! awesome i can’t wait to read all of the fab haikus.. LMAO that made my night

  15. whoops sorry double post

  16. Kstew looks HAWT in that picture.

    But I will forget I said that.

    Umm…fake James/Bff is amazing. I am seriously diggin’ the haiku-ness. I bet Kstew would love his artistic vibe. She would totally tap that.

  17. haiku back at you
    you really do look like James
    that is to say Hot

  18. Oh,yeah. Love the haiku. Strangest thing—I woke up this morning writing haikus to Rob (working on my poems for Vogue’s poetry contest!).

    What good guys to watch the Twilight with you.
    Enjoyed Far Beyond Frail.
    Looking forward to “Haiku-a-Week”.

  19. […] pick up the LTT poet in residence and zoom over to Santa Monica to embarrass him and UC’s hub by taking pictures of Lil E on […]

  20. […] Say you looked very pretty in those Nylon pics […]

  21. […] degrees from you: The Bff (ya know, the James look-alike we talk about on LTT) and his band, Far Beyond Frail, have the same manager as the […]

  22. […] Birthday Party a 19 yr old could ask for The BFF James look alike fell in love with her and created Haiku’s in her honor We uncovered her not so secret life partner We role played her working relationships […]

  23. […] groom to be- aka BFF James look-alike (remember him? He was the one who started Haiku’s for Kstew- yes ladies, he’s […]

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