Caught on video (by bored fans) Kristen Stewart’s acting tricks

Dear Kristen,

Your fans have broken down what some consider to be the hallmarks of your acting style. They include, the blink, the lip bite (sexy, I use this one too!),  the lip lick, the exhale and the hair toss all in video form, curated here by me! Please tell your fans to not attack us but rather to enjoy the absurdity that someone made these…

The Lip Bite – So people say you bite your lip a lot. This is the go to move when you’re a bit nervous or need a second to contemplate your next move. Or maybe you just have really dry lips and need someone to call cut so you can grab your chapstick. Totes understandable. Word to the wise, stay hydrated.

The Lip Lick – Someone broke it down in Twilight and you lick your lips 28 times in the movie. I want to meet the person who sat there and counted with a piece of paper and a pen while watching

The Blinking – You use this one when you seem perplexed or exacerbated. The blink is utilized to show us just how just how innocent and wide eyed you are and just how unthinkable what the other actor is saying/doing, really is.

The Exhale – used to show your disbelief or speechlessness. When used properly the exhale can be a good indicator that not only are you alive but you’re really thinking about what they said.

The Hair Toss - Oh the hair toss, girlhood’s most ancient of tricks. It can be a dead giveaway that you are nervous or super attracted to someone. In acting it can show your annoyance or personal flair for unruly hair

Now all together…

And then my favorite to show some love…

Now Kristen we’ve had some fun here today so please remind everyone that this is all in good clean fun and to have a laugh!

It’s like breathing…
Moon

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35 Responses

  1. first! yes!!! (makes you wonder why I am up so early on a Saturday???)

    Funny post ladies! I love the KStew acting school. hehe

  2. *Huff* Kristen Stewart is the greatest actress of all time. OF ALL TIME!

    Kidding, but I’m a little afraid of getting hunted down with pitchforks by a pack of rabid fangirls. So, let me say this. I don’t think she’s a bad actress by any means, but these videos hilariously point out that she uses a lot of the same tricks. She’s a young, somewhat awkward teenage girl, often playing a young awkward teenage girl, so I guess it works? I assume that her acting will mature as she matures.

    On an unrelated note. I’m pretty sure I could count on one hand the number of times Mel Gibson blinked in the version of Hamlet he did 20 years ago. It was creepy.

    So, lesson learned: Blinking = innocent teenager. Not blinking = vengeful Prince of Denmark.

    • mel gibson should never have been allowed NEAR hamlet. (because you all care about my opinion on this.)

      • Haha, agreed! He should also never be allowed near liquor… but that’s a story for another day.

    • Hee hee, new name.

      Well spotted! Innocent teenagers do blink rapidly and breathe heavily. (well only ones with asthma breathe heavily, but, still…)

  3. I’ve always had a hard time w/ Kristens acting. Its always the same character, same moves, same awkwardness.

    The other day I finally pinpointed why I have such a hard time with her. She reminds me of someone I was friends with for 5 years who ended up screwing me over royally. Same mannerisms, same style of dress, same awkwardness, same pretend badass additude….
    So, now I’m thinking maybe I’ll give her another chance. I rented The Messengers this weekend since I wanted a scary movie. Maybe it’ll change my opinion….. or maybe she’ll always be blinky mcstutter to me.

  4. haha, awesome post! Did she do anything else in Twilight apart from blinking and biting/licking her lip? I mean she had actual lines, right? Or did she? Maybe I was too captivated by Rob to really notice… ;-)
    And can anyone please count the number of time she just has her mouth closed and not hanging open? I didn’t have time to do that so far but I’d bet the number would be 0… Just saying.
    Okay, so now get the pitchforks out ;-)

  5. Bad acting or not…she still gets paid to make out with Rob and Taylor (booyah Chris!)

    Not that I love her or anything…just thought I would send out a reminder.

  6. Wait, Isn’t this a drinking game while you watch one of her movies??
    Blink* down a Shot —
    Blink * Shot.
    Stuttery – chug a beer.

    You would get so wasted during her movies…

    Wow cannot wait to see if she could surpressed “herself” when she played Joan Jett. Im sure JJ isnt all Mcblinkly and stuttery.

    Good Morning everyone. More snow and earthquakes around and Perez Hilton posted the ending of Remember me on his site.

    • omg Tigerkitten! I totes had the same idea!!! :-D

    • 1. Tigerkitten: Love your screen name…it’s from CWIA right? Love that fic.

      2. She totes does the lip bite/lick in the Runaways trailer … I really hope she toned it down because Joan doesn’t do that stuff.

      3. I want to kill Perez Hilton for posting the ending and myself for not being able to stop reading. I am going to cry like KStew in a hospital bed at the end of Remember Me. From the Eclipse trailer and the ending of that movie we’re all going to need some little bottles that day.

      • I luvs CWIA so sad its over.
        I really miss Wallbanger so if guys know her tell her Im am missing Clive badly. LOL

        Im so going to do the drinking game on March 20 (my BDay ya’ll) and watch a double feature twilight with New Moon with a bottle of Stoli? Maybe just Patron.

        Boo on Perez, I read the script in January but it wont stop me from going to see some hot sexing with Tyler. I think I will be crying like bella in the woods all abandoned in a fetal position.

        • Girl I love me some Wallbanger too. Feathers needs to write that ish. I think my ovaries exploded when I saw the new chapter get posted last week.

          I am all about the hot Tyler sexin too as well as Bel Ami. I hope Biel gets her lovely hands on the sexin and makes a schmexy BD fan trailor or something.

          Gonna be up in the Walgreens buyin some batteries hayyy! LOL

  7. Seeing as I know nothing about professional acting, let me just say that although the first few vids were hilarious and maybe the girl could keep her hands out of her hair a LOT more, I think that last one might have made me fall in fake lesbian love with her. She just seems like a lot of fun.

    I’d definitely go out drinking/partying with her. And only KStew could rock the mullet in 2010. Just sayin.

  8. LOVE these vids. I adore Kristen Stewart and all of her idiosyncrasies! Whomever put these together definitely has some patience.

  9. Hmm, maybe this is all part of her insight on Bella’s clumsiness… she falls down a lot because she blinks so often her eyes are nearly always shut, and she spends so much time exhaling that she’s actually suffering from oxygen deficiency too… probably explains the stuttering too as her brain’s partially shut down due to lack of oxygen…

    • Wow, are you a doctor? That seems pretty darned spot on to me.
      ;)

  10. Drinking game for Eclipse? Just make sure you have a designated driver. Preferably one who knows their way to the local ER.

    • haha … can we smuggle our little bottles into the theater?

      maybe when the new moon dvd comes out we can all do the drinking game. it might be too dangerous with liquor so how about heineken or rainier? lol.

      make sure to have a good meal of veggie burgers, hot pockets, and mushroom ravioli beforehand too.

  11. OMG I know this subject has been brought up before but it never ceases to make me lmao.

    The lip biting/lip licking is understandable with Rob around. Maybe that’s what attracted him to her? All that licking, she must be good at the oral or something.

    Love in the blinking video they had the hospital bed. So damn funny. I like to blink/stutter it out just to piss my fiance off. I win the argument every time because he starts laughing.

    Oh and the hair flip video makes me hope she gets a blond role soon. I miss a BlondStew.

  12. Kristen couldn’t act her way out of paper bag with an out board motor, a gun, and some dynamite. She stinks big time. http://defutebol.net

  13. when you are perplexed… arent you speechless too?
    so, when she is perplexed she blinks…a lot.
    but…. when she is also speechless she gets an asthma thingy?

    how do you blink 20 times per second and also have asthma?

    Damn… she is a good actress..
    If I had asthma, I wouldn’t blink… I would run to get my freaking inhaler…

    She is kind of a workaholic cause she doesnt care that she cant breath, but if she is blinking enough…

    Didnt cathy the cougar realize this?

    • Thats a… uhhh… brain deformity.

      *Blink*

  14. Hungry Like the Wolf FTW!!!!

  15. Big time LOL’s this morning. Thanks ladies!!!

  16. LOL love it! I’d noticed her unique “acting style” before and the lip biting thing always drove me crazy, but I *just* realized that it totally works in Twilight, cause in the books Bella bites her lip alllll the time, and in Midnight Sun Edward is always freaking out about whether she’s going to hurt herself doing that lol. Perfect! My fave vid is the grunt one – with them all strung together like that it sounds hilarious! Oh LTT, how you make my day.

  17. *strolls in carrying ten foot pole*

    *looks around*

    HALE NO! Not gonna touch it.

    *pole vaults out*

  18. I had never noticed the lip licking thing…now it’s all I’ll see…but, as I’m a KStew fan, & like her mannerisms I’m sure I’ll get used to it. I find it all endearing. I have sympathy for the nervous….

    Note to self: must knit tongue for Bella Sock Puppet asap…

  19. *Licks lips, opens mouth, decides to say something, closes mouth, licks lips, bites lip, gets confused, bites tounge, blood spurts everywhere, accidentally drinks some of blood, vomits, licks lips, breathes heavily, stumbles toward bathroom…*

    I likeyyyy. (this post)

  20. Two things.

    One-her blinking spasms were why we were so drunk playing the Twilight drinking game.

    and

    Two-when she keeps running her hands through her hair I kind of start to wonder if she has bugs or something.

  21. I watched all of those videos and could only come up with one coherent reaction: What is wrong with her?!

  22. That video of Kristens breathing was hilarious!! Hah!! That’s like her signature move. But it’s not really a move it’s just … A breath

  23. This girl seriously needs acting classes. **awaits pitchforks** She also plays herself in every movie. I hope she doesn’t ruin Joan Jett for me. Someone earlier mentioned rabid fangirls. It is pretty funny that if you say that she is anything less than perfect, they freak. Does Kristen have chronic dry eye or asthma? Also, buy that girl some Chapstick.

  24. [...] people with a lot of time on their hands create videos like “The Kristen Stewart School of Acting.” I guess you must be doing something right! I like the way you work it, No [...]

  25. what drove me crazy the first time I saw the movie (and Kristen too) was the head shake. Did you notice how she shakes it constantly. I was getting seasick!

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