What if Hitler read Twilight?

Dear LTTers,

I know what you do. You see we do a video post and you say “Oh, I’ll watch that later” or “Nah. Not in the mood for a video today” and go on your merry way, never coming back to watch the brilliant videos we hand-pick for you. Don’t let that be the case today.  Take 6 minutes out of your day to watch these two videos. Stick your kids in front of the teletubbies (does that still exist?) and sneak to the bathroom if you’re working and watch them on your iPhone. I’m serious. I needed this laugh and you need this laugh. There’s nothing going on in the Twi-world. Nothing to lift your spirits…. except for this.

(Warning: May not be funny if German is your first language. Or maybe it will be. I have no idea! UPDATE: if you speak German, MUTE the video and it’ll be funny!)

Hilter Finds out Edward leaves Bella in New Moon

Hilter Finds out the Eclipse script has leaked

Laughing yet?
UnintendedChoice

Follow the jump for an exciting announcement!

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THANK YOU BIKECHICK!!!

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105 Responses

  1. well 1st off, i want to say that the “heading” for todays post took me a-back a bit. but i’ve recovered now… i’m waiting for the vids to download… i’ll let you know if i’m stumbled. ;)

    • okay, i watched them… funny. totally inappropriate, but the subtitles are funny. but yeah, i don’t think it’ll be funny if you understand German, umm, no. some people out there in the world wide web-dom have way too much time on there hands… but if Hitler “really was” THAT obssessed w/ Twilight/NM/Eclipse then i would have to rethink my love for it… b/c i want nothing in comon w/ him… *shudder*

      • apparently it’s like a “thing” to use that clip and change the subtitles… bikechick saw a Hilter/iPad commercial and then said “I bet someone did this for Twilight” which, of course, they did!

        • UC..I <3 you and I know that you didn't make this thing…I couldn't read the subtitles, because I cannot believe that somebody can relate in any form this videos to Twilight. It's horrible…and I usually don't comment here, but I felt that I have to say that today…and YES…german is my first language and Hitler was a mass murderer…. and I'm doing this comment because I just wanted to give you a little feedback.

        • This did this clip with a NFL playoff game last year, I think it was the Cowboys and the Giants.

      • Seriously, with the downthumb?

        I mean, seriously?

        • StotheP..thanks for your note.<3

        • i know, right? why the crap did someone thumbdown my comment? i was just stating my feelings and yes, umm, “hello?” Hitler?! gawd… i have close affiliations w/ groups of people who were killed in the camps and i have been to the Holocaust museum, so i personally don’t happen to appreciate the reference… witty consept but tacky use. no offense intended to UC, she didn’t create it, so why thumb me down? what-ever.. go ahead… someone’ll just do it again… *rasberries*

          • this site is meant for sharing opinions, am i wrong?
            unless you’re TammyO and out to get everyone, there really shouldn’t be very many thumbs downs.
            it’s so ridiculous.

        • Seriously shocked by the thumbsdown on ambushed’s comment.

          • thank you *sniffle*

  2. That was incredible. The BEST way to start my morning.
    “Stop crying you stupid emo. You know it sucked” – I love that line.

    I feel like it might not be as funny if you can understand German though. And now that I’m thinking about it, I feel kind of bad. It’s probably not a laughing matter at all..

    Either way though. Totally brilliant.

    • i know… i bet it’s totally awful in German.. i wish it was in some language no one knew!

      I know we have German readers.. so we’ll find out!

      • as I said…it’s awful….but I’m not offended…it’s just awful!

        • I haven’t seen this film.
          What’s going on in the scene for real?

          • I know the movie is about Hitler’s final 12 days in his bunker in Berlin. I haven’t seen it in years, but I’m pretty sure this is the part where he is told that the Allies have made it to Berlin.

          • me neither!!

  3. I loved these. I loved Inglorious Basterds even more. Tarantino is a genius. I love him. That is all.

    • I second that.

    • INGLORIOUS BASTARDS SPOILER ALERT i walked into our living room once when the hubby was watching IB. It was the scene at the end. with the fire. and then in the woods… NOT a good place to walk in. But i was entranced… I had no idea what was going on..

      Then I asked “is this a true story” and he looked at me like i’m totally stupid (it was a DUMB question) and said “yes, hilter and all the nazi’s burned in a movie theater”

      • You must watch it! It was seriously one of the most intense movies I’ve seen, which is impressive considering there are long bouts of dialogue that you would think could be boring. Seriously though, the beginning 15 mins or so of that movie had me feeling ready to explode. And Christopher Waltz playing Hans Landa is one of the best villains I’ve ever seen.

        • oooooooooooo, that’s a bingo!!! (sorry, I just loved that line so much I take every opportunity presented to say it)

          • I forgot about that line! It totally cracked me up though. Now I’m going to need to use it… Thanks for reminding me. I’m sure the people that will be listening to me say that over and over again will thank you too. Not.

        • Christoph Waltz is now in my freebie five cause his award acceptance speeches said nothing of poop in his pants.

          • hahaha. But he DID mention “golden balls”.

      • GAH! UC!

        At least put a spoiler alert on yourself!

        I haven’t seen it either, but it is currently in my DVD player waiting for me for tonight.

        • oh CRAP. did i just ruin it!? forgive me. I should know better

          • BTW, everyone dies at the end of Breaking Dawn.

          • *sobs hysterically*

            Oh. And Harry dies too.

          • and the boat sinks in Titanic.

          • I heard some guy dies at the end of Passion of the Christ, but I forget who…

          • One more thing…

            Kristin Shepard shot JR. Don’t confuse her w/ Kristen Stewart… although I wouldn’t put it past her.

    • Tavern scene in IB is one of my all time favorites. Brims with suspense. Thanks for bringing it up, Sparklecakes.

      • IKR? Seriously adore that movie. Best role Brad has ever played IMO and Diane Kruger was amazing. Dood, what I would give to pick the brain of Mr. Tarantino.

        • Totally agree with you, Sparklecakes, it’s Brad’s best role ever. Loved the music, too.

    • IG was amazing!! Christoph deserves every award he’s winning.. he totally made that movie what it is!!
      “That’s a bingo!”, “Eye-talian”, “Do you mind if I smoke my pipe”… Again, the movie is amazing!!

  4. Have you guys seen the one where Hitler reads Breaking Dawn?

    You can find it on youtube. It’s hilarious! (warning: if you liked BD, you might not find it funny).

    • In that case I’ll LOVE it! ;)

    • yes…! there are a bunch more of these to post in the future!

  5. I think this might have been the funniest Twi-vid I’ve ever seen. I can understand a fair bit of German and I’ve seen the movie, but it is still f*cking funny!

  6. I love the really quiet “Godammit, Jasper” line!

    • I loved the “Why did that discoball leave her?!” line. I dunno why

      • Maybe because discoball belongs in the same category as marshmallow.

  7. There are non-Twilight related ones too, I checked on youtube. Whoever made them is a genius, I’m gonna be laughing all day!

  8. These are hilarious. Slightly sick and hilarious.

  9. They’re just as funny on mute!

    • Yes they are! Hitler may not have been funny in real life, but watching this has the same surreal feel as a Monthy Python sketch. Want to re-watch the North Minehead by-election-sketch with “Mr Hilter”, “Ron Vibbentrop” and “German Herring” ineptly in hiding at an English boarding house, anyone? :-)

      http://orangecow.org/pythonet/sketches/nthmine.htm

      • Hahahaha! Yes!! Planning a little excursion, eh, Mr. Hitler?

  10. I saw those videos before and they are so funny!

    PS- I love that t-shirt with those flowers…I want!

  11. This is hilarious! I don’t think any Germans will be offended though… he’s quite funny in German too. At this stage of the movie (Der Untergang, brill, watch it!) he’s completely lost his mind anyway, so there ain’t much sense comin’ out of him.

    “I bet James Cameron did this because Jackson Rathbone is in the real Avatar movie, Avatar: The Last Airbender.” OfficeLOL

    • Nope. Not offended. I think we are the people that make fun of this guy the most.

      • Yeah, nobody hates Hitler more than Germans.

    • That was my fav line, too!!!!!

  12. UC you might want to change Hilter to Hitler!!!!

    Very funny, especially in both vids when they all leave if you have thought of the sparkly one’s skin, are on team edward, robsten etc.

    x

    • HILTER? hahah.. i love myself sometimes

      • I love yourself ALL the time :-D

      • we love you long time

        x

  13. Bwahahahaa! Just what I needed – thanks UC!
    “Have you SEEN 30 Days of Night?” LMFAO

  14. Nope. Not funny, if German is your first language bc you listen more than you read.
    But it is funny, if you mute it and only read the subtitles without being distracted by what he says.

  15. I have no words for how great this is. Tears in my eyes from LMAO.

  16. Get me Chris Weiz on the phone!

    Who listens to a giant silver bunny??

    Thanks, UC. Now I’m in the uncomfortable position of thinking Hitler was a pretty amusing dude…

    • Haha, the “Donnie Mother f*cking Darko” line cracked me up!

    • i just like to think that the german playing that part was an amusing dude

  17. Ah ha ha ha! Flippin HILAR! The Eclipse one was the best I thought. ‘And why couldn’t KStew just wear a wig for her part in The Runaways!’ lmao I can’t!

  18. Booo I can’t play along because my work blocks YouTube. Jerks =( Probably for the best, though. Whoever is watching my internet activity already thinks I’m weird enough… throw in a Hitler video and I have a feeling I’d be in HR pretty quickly.

  19. I kinda love videos that make fun of Hitler.

    We can either make fun or cry and get angry. I choose make fun today.

    “and to make things worse, that rat son of a bitch jacob can make a move on her now!”

    That killed me! It’s exactly my same thought in New Moon.

    • OMG. I just watched the second vid.

      That is further proof that I really am an “emo Hitler”.

      I NEED THE EMOTICON! *pushes back emo bangs*

      I’m disturbed. Disturbed that my reaction to the script leak was exactly the same.

  20. Gah damn that was funny. I know it takes a certain sense of humor to find Hitler funny but lets be honest. That evil SOB deserves to look like a little bitch that would be bothered over a “girlie” movie.

    • exactly

  21. I can’t wait to get home and see what you’re talking about. Stupid Work security wall.

  22. “Frederick … didn’t you go to that concert last week? …. Go get me your laptop.” BWAH HAHA!

    So inappropriate and hilarious.

  23. i would have expected Adolf Hitler to do something like this:

  24. Thanks for the videos! I was doing my snort-laugh, so you know it was good! And yes, 30 days of Night was a bloodbath so I am excited to see Eclipse. I have imaged it will be something like 30don and the Girls Not Grey vid David Slade did for AFI…with blinking and stuttering. It will be great! :-)

  25. These were too funny not to share, despite the original subject material. I don’t speak enough German to understand, but I’m told that this scene is where Hitler is told that Berlin is surrounded. Again, not a funny subject but when taken out of context, if we don’t take it too seriously, credit to those who put these together (and there are a MILLION versions of this out there) because I laughed my A$$ off at these!

    Crystal (bikechick3)

  26. bahahhahaha. thank you.

  27. omg… that was fuuuuunny!!

    im glad i dont understand german
    if it were in es-pan-itch it wouldnt have been funny

    :]

  28. haha! I love that one, the one where he reads Breaking Dawn is hilarious too!

    (and as far as that shirt on the mannequin, I love it… I got it at Ross ;)

  29. anybody wanna see some new Charlie Bewley pics? I know there are some fans out there! (WHERE’S TeamSeth?!) clicky!

    http://www.eclipsemovie.org/new-charlie-bewley-photo-shoot/#more-39941

    • TS, I could use a few new BB photos, please.

      • Here ya go. http://bit.ly/1YSI5R :D

  30. OH MY GOD! It’s like you really know what goes on in my head.

    I freakin’ love these Hitler parody videos. People have been teasing me about my love for Fake Hitler because I post these to Facebook all the time, the latest being the reactions to the stupid iPad.

    My esteem for you, which was already very high, has just grown (that’s what she said) exponentially. <3 your faces 4eva.

  31. You have to goose step pretty early in the morning to link Hitler and Twilight.
    Funny stuff.

  32. …and damn you US for showing us that really cute top. Agh, I like that style too. Now you have me on Anthropologie’s website looking at stuff I can’t buy.

    • oops, I meant UC.

    • i’m just thinking that shirt would really show off some nip, ya know?

  33. ok you guys normally I am not easily affected of any disturbing video but this one is just bad…
    How is someone even able to relate Twilight to Hitler?!? I mean I know people outside of Germany make jokes about him because they dont know how serious it actually was… But we in Germany take it very very serious (like tweed-serious) and therefore I don’t find this funny at all. If it wasn’t posted over here I would have ignored it for sure…

    • That’s an interesting cultural comparison, Bleriana. I can see where you’re coming from. We have distance, and it didn’t really affect any of us. Is there anything that Germans/Europeans joke about that the US might not find funny?

      • ‘Is there anything that Germans/Europeans joke about that the US might not find funny?’

        BWAHHAHAHA!

        Sorry, *struggles to put on serious face*.

        • Dude it’s like the opposite! They were telling German jokes in a Fassbinder film when I was first learning it and it was utterly unfunny…but very existential.

    • I can’t speak for all non-Germans, but I’m pretty sure we are all aware that Hitler was a pretty bad guy. Certainly no one here thinks his actions were a joke, but these clips are not making fun of genocide.

    • Please. This video is making fun of him. He would have hated that, even more reason to do so. Srsly people, my grand parents have suffered in the war too. Don’t turn this into a Europe vs. US thing. This video isn’t insulting anyone except Hitler. So hurray for that.

      Go on and downthumb me all you want. I’m not gonna apologize this time. I’m not mad at anyone and everyone is entitled to their opinion, but I don’t like people telling me what I’m supposed to find funny and insinuate that I don’t take the war seriously. Belgium was in the war too. The war was horrible. Hitler was an ass. That video is funny. The end.

      Big Hug en no hard feelings! ;)

      • Hitler is what makes The Producers funny. Anytime you can take ultimate evil and turn it into a buffoon is ok by me.

  34. Hilarious! This is why I love LTT/LTR. You find all this stuff when I don’t have time to. Thank you, thank you, thank you….. Again!

    • B- just for the record I don’t find it funny because it is Hitler. It’s funny because of the words and the idea that someone would be mad about the story and acting that way. I didn’t imagine it was Hitler while listening even though that is who the actor was portraying, just a angry person.

      You are right of course, nothing about Hitler is funny.

      • See, I think it’s funny BECAUSE it’s Hitler. If it was just some random guy THAT upset that Edward dumped Bella it would probably make me smile. But dude, Hitler is one of the most evil guys ever and he’s screaming at the SS about Edward and Bella? That’s pretty damn funny.

        • It’s funny.

        • Exactly! Making light of something serious doesn’t mean one is necessarily irreverant, especially when it is in the past, we’ve learned from it and moved on, without forgetting. However, mocking a depiction of Hitler, not his victims, is funny to me – whether it be him complaining about the iPad, Twilight, and especially when he gets banned from Xbox Live. I completely agree with you JodieO.

  35. I laughed. I did. I felt bad, but I laughed. Hitler…. wow.
    “Why do you keep calling her Isabella??” *giggle giggle*

  36. Genius! The Twilight road to world peace.

    We can start by shipping copies of the saga to every dictator in the world, rope them into fandom and ta da! they’ll be to busy commenting on LTT and scanning the web for latest Robsten pics to notice the people taking back their countries. It’s infallible!!!

    PS Is it mean because I chuckle at everyone assuming Hitler would be TeamEdward?

  37. This was pretty freaking funny. So thank you for making me actually laugh out loud (it was needed). The war and what he did was a horrible tragedy but why not make fun of the devil’s spawn. We all know who and what the bastard was. My .02 FWIW (–not very much I know)

  38. after a crappy day…that’s all I needed to stop crying and start laughing, Thank You!

  39. http://link.brightcove.com/services/player/bcpid463901453?bctid=63666777001
    Has anybody seen this video?
    Jamie Campbell Bower, Jack Huston (who plays Royce King in Eclipse) and Tom Sturridge are in it! :D

  40. Hitler is Team Edward? Ha! See! Team Jacob rules once again. Allies for Team Jacob.

    What? German was my 4th language. It’s funny.

  41. I think the clips are hilarious – the original clip is from Downfall, a German film documenting the last hours of Hitler’s rule, and the freak out is in regard to him finding out essentially, that all is lost. It’s a film. That is an actor. Toying with subtitles is fun, getting emotional about the alteration to the subtitles of a fictional film about a madman is a little silly.

  42. [...] jealous with this amazing necklace from Jeweled Ambrosia. You’ll probably remember us raving about Jeweled Ambrosia’s adorable vintage-inspired Twilight jewelery a few weeks ago. I squeed when I saw this necklace with [...]

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