Big Daddy & Taylor go to the Olive Garden “where they’re family”

Hmmmm I can almost taste "The Tour of Italy"

Dear Big Daddy,

I see that you convinced Taylor to go to the Olive Garden for a lunch of all-you-can-eat “Soup, Salad and Breadsticks” so that you can finally get that last punch on your frequent diner card. Free chocolate lasagna with you next meal here you come! It’s also nice that you swung by Santa Monica Ave to pick up a local tranny to participate in your “Launter for a day” charity that you started with the family. Every weekend the family picks up a stray tranny/hobo/Disney star to “adopt for the day” and show them what Lautner-style hospitality is really all about. What they don’t know if that for every diner you bring in you get an extra punch on your card, so really it’s cutting your time till you get the free dessert in half. You’re SO smart, no one could pull a “shocker” on you! You’re pretty much the reason Outback had to stop their frequent diner program, after a week of consecutive lunches with the cast of The Suite Life plus all the ladies from Jumbo’s Clown Room (look it up) they almost went bankrupt from giving out so many free Bloomin’ Onions. Way to stick it to the man!

LTT: Where you’re family,
Themoonisdown

Black v neck? Check! Shiteous Nikes? Check! Borrowed plaid shirt? FAIL!

Dear Taylor,

So either Rob gave his costars personalized shiteous Nike’s for Xmas or this is a not-so-silent plea for GQ to name you their number 1 Best Dressed Male in 2011. Well played friend, well played!

XO
Moon

Follow the cut for an extra special Saturday surprise… you should defs follow the cut if your name is UC

This video is for my wonderful amazing co-blogger UC, cause I know how much she loves Owl City and Taylor. I just knew I had to post it…

(I’m laughing thinking about your face right now)

Photos from Celebrity Gossip Net and video from UC’s wildest dreams

Our internet game is still ridiculous: The Forum, LTR, Twitter

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76 Responses

  1. Dear Tay,

    If you have “friends”/ ex-girlfriends who look like THAT, I would just like to say…*does happy dance and offers a silent prayer of thanks to the powers that be* thanks so much for the sign that we will be besties forever…

    Yes she may be thinner than me..but even with ALL my lower-than-Jacob’s Marky Mark-Jorts-self esteem, I can honestly say “omg…I am GORGEOUS compared to her”. No offence Sarah, I’m sure you have a great personality (I might out-do u on that one too but I’m not sure…dont want to push my luck…) but errr…I need to use u as a gauge in my delusional fantasies. I hope u dont mind,,,you got to kiss him so u cant be too bad…

    Anyhoo, Thanks for the hawt outfit, (If I could afford ANY Nikes, shiteous or not I would wear them everyday too…so dont worry I “get” it) the less than swirly but nevertheless awesome hair porn and for the shot of Big Daddy…I’ve been missing my gentle giant..
    S call me…or email…or twitter…I’m flexible (thats what I said)
    Love,
    Your future BFF who has NOT eaten at Olive Garden and would probably qualify as a transvestite hobo who dresses as Ariel, aka Me

    Morning everybody!
    The hamster really needed these pics to make herself feel better..and now feels awful for it…weeeird…

    • morning!

    • Morning ILWL…how does that dose of Taylor start your weekend! YOU COULD SOOO BE his BFF with confidence now..your smile alone would make him swoon..(did I really say swoon)? Anyway, told ya all along you were the best looking panda in the forest…..
      I could only watch a couple of seconds, cause truly its like watching my son…(only he has lighter hair) and THAT is totes awkward for me..

      Moon..it seems only fair that we Edward fans get equal time with a 3.51 minute video!!!

      Happy Weekend everyone… :)

      • MidCyn- fast forward to about the two minute mark. It turns into RPattz pix!

        • Thanks KitKat…glad to take in any pics of Edward..even if only a few!!!

      • MIdCyn – I thought the same thing…where’s the Rob love? But thankfully I stayed with the video long enough to enjoy some (but not enough) Rob pictures.

      • *whispers* I was using the sarcasm font. She IS prettier than me and I really DO look like a tranny hobo version of The Little Mermaid…
        I love his pic though…sigh…such a lovely and yet possibly sinful way of starting a sunday…

        muah muah!

      • MidCyn- So how old is your son? Just asking….

        • Now if I tell you that…you will try and guess my age…ahhh not! He is an adult..let’s leave it at that..k! I will tell you that I am proud to say that I raised a unicorn although he HATES that term…even after I explained it to him….lol…

          • just tell him it’s better than “leprachaun” or “fairie” or “gnome” or any other mythical beast…..Oh, I just had an idea…we can call him a minotaur or a centaur instead. He might prefer that. I think we could all make a special excepting for MidnightCyn’s son!!!

          • P.S. I will tell you that his Birthday is also in Feb. only its the 8th!

          • @absolutelyvlc..lmaodiw! I did try telling him that several times..he was still not impressed at all…I like the centaur..he might think that is better! He is so funny..I seriously think that is why I have such a difficult time looking at Taylor/Jacob, he so reminds me of my son, same skin tone, height and build, the only real differences are that his hair color is lighter and he has blue eyes.

          • Oh mama, did you just deliberately cross the cross the line to pimping your offspring? Methinks you very proud of his hotness. Hope you taught him to use his power wisely.

          • @S.J. Do hope you are being “sarcastic” with that comment. YOU asked about him. I only explained as I have several times why I don’t see Jacob/Taylor the same way everyone else does. My son is happily engaged to be married to a wonderful girl….and I don’t “consider his hotness” at all, we are talking about my son….careful….

          • MC – Doing penance all day as well as finding a sarcastic/teasing font.

            Plz forgive!

          • @SJ..No problem, its all good…

    • Dear Illegal- so glad to see you’e the first to comment today. You really have your eye on the game (not to mention the prize).

      Remember what I was talking about a few days ago ie my ability to see visions of the little (or, more to the point, not so little) scamp in the future? Let’s just say I found this whole picture and scenario scary.

      I mean its nice that he has a fallback chick and all but how can we be sure she’s keeping him away from that comforting chocolate lasagne everytime he gets dumped?

      We need someone in at the coalface to keep force feeding him salad and meat patties. He needs a BFF who gets it, he neeeeeeeds you Illegal – you’re our only hope!!!!!!!!!

      PS Would volunteer myself but there is no way I’d be able to refuse a chocolate lasagne landing at our table.

      PPS I think BigDaddy is doing a ‘thumbs up job’ showing Lil’ Scamp just because you make a stack load of cashola don’t mean you go blow it on fancy restaurants and high end call girls.

      PPS I think BigDaddy is looking a little trimmer.

      • PPPs Have just been over to Jumbo’s Clown Room and it should be totally OK for family outings.

        Thanks for the post Moon.

      • SJ!!! I’m never first cause after I type out my rant-fest at least a million people have commented already….Its another sign I tell you!
        I LOVE that you think that I’ll be strong enough to resist the chocolate lasagna…I’ll be all over that while encouraging him to stick with the patties and slap his hand away when he reaches for the bread sticks…Yes… I’m willing to take one for the team and eat all the sugar and carbs he’s not allowed to… :)
        And when he gets dumped, I’ll be around with ice cream (which I will eat) and I’ll get him carrot sticks….cause if carrots cant cheer you up..ure doomed….lol
        I really should stop…my life is consumed with thoughts of the Illegalautner BFF-dom…it’s very very unhealthy…I mean it’s not even a romantic fantasy (yet) over a guy who doesnt know I exist… what a waste of my life…sigh…
        Jumbo’s? I think that will be the moment he’s gonna realise that he may be a little in love with me…amongst the prancing clowns…le sigh…see? waste of a life… :(

        • I just want to know who’s in charge of the b’day bash and can I be on the planning committee as I would like to know dress code so I can start planning my outfit. I think an underwater trannie/hobo seacreatures theme would be very unusal and sounds like most of us wouldn’t even have to go shopping for new duds.

          Unhealthy fantasies – yeah *sigh*, I just suck it up and smile. i might go as a jellyfish – my 2 yo niece taught me the best jellyfish impersonation, seriously, she has a gift.

          PS You seriously weren’t first? Living in the future is very confusing and my poor brain does not like doing math.

          • LOL…I meant that being first for me is so rare…Staying up after a party and commenting on LTT instead of going to bed really did pay off….

            Ooh ooh…I’m thinking green and blue streamers for the authentic ocean feel and a giant Little Mermaid cake with his face instead of Prince Eric’s and Megan Fox as Ariel…He’ll love that…

            I think I’ll stick to Hobolicious tranny Ariel. I also do amazing Whale sounds…you know…for atmosphere…
            Should I start making the invites now? (dont worry I’ve already made ours…cause we live in the future and all that…

          • Oh. I get it now, you live in the future too, duh. How exciting – it makes me feel so less ‘no friends Nigel’ somehow knowing there are others in similar timezones with similar ‘interests’.

            PArty theme – tick
            Decos/cake – tick
            Food/Part Games – I was thinking tic-toc biscuits and a new legal-age-appropriate version of What’s the Time Mr Wolf? I hope Kellan comes, he looks very much the age-appropriate party game type.

            I hope there were plenty of nice boys at you party last night – sounds like you’re balancing RL/FanLife very well, I mean as long as you didn’t wear a tshirt with ‘I Want to Do a Wolf’ on it, ……..did you? ‘Cause people may not quite get it……….

          • Yay! I’m in NZ – boresville of Twilight…you?
            I was thinking we’ll add some meat patties…Cant let him slip just cause its his birthday…then he’ll want cake and ice cream at EVERY holiday an we just cant have that…Kellan is def invited..he’ll keep everyone chaste and calm (read- stopping them from molesting Tay) by playing “Guess the bible verse – Having the sex is wrong edition”)

            There were cute boys and I’m leaving that shirt for my first meeting with Tay…ice-breaker fur shure…lol

          • No way! You mean ur surrounded by hot kiwi guys with hot kiwi accents, the hottest accent on earth. Mmmmmm, hot kiwi guy, cold english night….ah memories. He got tired of me asking him to say teh word ‘six’ – gets me every time. Am now back surrounded by unsexy aussie accents.

            OMG!! -you can teach ‘Lil Lauts how speak with said accent and he will be the ruler of all hotness on earth.

            NZ no like Twi? So sad.

          • I’m sure you can incorporate tee into ariel costume, nay, i think it is unavoidable.

          • Lol…I’m originally from Sri Lanka…Just here for college…I have such a weird accent based on yeeeears of speech and drama training…like American, British and now a little kiwi…I’d be surprised if the lil’ Scamp understands me at all…

            I should totally wear the tee *takes out bright red dye and mermaid tail* Its not like I can go topless…lol

          • It’s not like I can go topless….

            Ha! Well, not to start with no.

            I bet your accent is still super sexy and if he can’t understand you imagine the stuff you can get away with saying to him.

            BTW. I f you still have friends & fam in Sri Lanka hope they are all safe & well. Have been a lot of demos in the city lately.

            Off to hang out with niece and practise being a jellyfish. I want to have it completely down by Feb. Esp. if you do the whale sounds at same time. He’ll LOVE IT.

        • Yay! Have oodles of fun…try and make a video..i’ll add the whale sounds…It’ll be our gift to him…Yeah my whole family is back there…I worry about them every day.

          Our BFF-dom will be EPIC due to my accent alone…Think of the misunderstandings..the fights…the making out….up i mean UP after the fights…

          imma stop now…cause this is getting ridic! lol

    • She’s a butter face. Srsly. Every time he breaks up with a girl, he’s out with his ex-gf within the next week. xD

  2. Oh, Gawd how I have missed y’all!! Moving blows.

    This is fantastic as per usual. And well, now makes me want soup, salad and breadsticks. Thanks Moon.

    Congrats to our very own SuperHumanMoron…she gave birth to a beautiful baby girl last night and had enough sense to NOT name her Bella. Love her!!

    • HAHA! I just realized I wrote the wrong screenname for myself. HAHA!!!

      It’s Sassysmart, not Sassafras…which is a root.

      • Oh welcome to my world Sassy…I forget who I am almost every day! Pass on congratulations to Superhumanmoron!!! Please tell us she also DID NOT NAME HER Renesmee or anything close to that??? Only kidding….I just know that sometimes the hospital screws those things up…especially the late shift when they are secretly reading Twilight and are tired…they are the ones that fill out the birth certificates and they DO make mistakes..I KNOW FROM EXPERIENCE! Trust!
        You were missed Sassy…as always!! ((HUGS))

    • Congratulations and pink balloons to SuperHumanMoron!!!
      :D

      • I can’t wait for the generation flooded with Twinames, sure there will be plenty of Edwards, Bellas, Jacobs etc but full points will surely go to the first proud parents
        of a little Robsten, Taycob or Jedward.

        Who knows, maybe we can even hold out for my personal favourite ‘Taybert’- I know, sounds like a muppet, how cute!

        • If I ever procreate, I’m praying to have a boy so that I can name Demetri Felix. Just saying. Griffs, start making up the “Demi” nicknames now!

        • If I ever get to name a child however, I would have to go with StupidEffingEndingHowAboutSomeHeartWrentchingDeaths? – with the ? mark included.

        • Random facts-
          Jacob has been the number one guys name since about 1999. It finally overtook Michael, which was number one starting in about 1958 until then.

          Isabella is currently number two on the girls list.

          Edward has yet to make a comeback.

    • Congrats and best wishes to Superhumanmoron and Mr. Superhumanmoron!! (she the Hamburgler avatar, right?)

      Kisses and hugs LTT styles :-D

  3. The Shiteous Nikes!
    It’s clearly “younger brother syndrone” or “im friends with a dude that more girls drop their panties for, im hoping i can i get in on this action by wearing the same clothes and doing the same mannerisms as he”.
    he’s clearly trying to hoodwink stupid girls into thinking he is rob by dressing like him.

    or taytay bought rob a new pair of nikes, seeing as rob’s pair are probably starting to disintergrate from overuse. and when rob refused clothes that have not been worn by hobos, taytay was like “screw it i’ll break them in for you”.

  4. Big Daddy’s back! Yay!

    I’m SURE this girl looks better in RL…but she does appear to be a current *afficionado* of that harsh over-done look that can make real ladies look a bit like tired ladyboys. I thinking of Jordan here – she bizarrely spends ££££££££££s on making herself look worse. Beware, Miley Cyrus.What is with this?

    Anyway, can’t be hating on teenage girls for fashion faux pas…like many the fact that we had no Youtube is a total lifesaver. I was a punk. Really.

    P.S. Agree/disagree? Once you’ve known someone for a while they end up looking like their personality, rather than just the bare physicality of their looks…so you can totally ADORE someone who may not be facially (or other) blessed…That’s what my friends tell me & I BELIEVE THEM. WHO KNEW CAPS LOCK WAS SO EFFING CATHARTIC?

    • I disagree.

      I only love superficially beautiful people.

      Ugly people should all go to HALE!

      & I need that sarcastic font. Again.

    • “tired ladyboys”

      This Made My Day! It’s officially now my new saying :)

      • I also call that look ‘lamb dressed as mutton dressed as lamb’. Somehow these glorious young things manage to make themselves look like older ladies (vintage…like me) who are putting up a mighty struggle against age…(not like me) i.e.:
        a) hair dyed several tones too dark in a *youthful* shade
        b) hair extensions to replace the long lustrous locks of youth
        c) foundation/fake tan 1 shade too dark & several centimetres too thick to emulate fine textured, glowing, young fresh skin.

        Or of course, someone sensible could bitch slap them, kindly, get them to take all that crap off…let their own youth & glowingness through, & tell them only to try replacing stuff when it’s actually gone….

        Off soapbox. I hate this *look*. Anyone tell?

      • “ladyboys” is a perfect way of describing this look. I’ve been trying to figure out an appropriate term ever since the look came ‘in”
        Thanks!

    • Does that mean I REALLY look like a sad, ranting panda?
      I agree Beaker…I mean some people are beautiful and yet you cant appreciate it cause their of their personality and then there are others who you cant help but love cause of their personality alone…
      I’m so glad I have people in my life who are willing to put up with a person who has neither looks nor personality… lol

      • I really want to yell your real name. Right now.

        SDC?

        Bad panda. Bad.

        • U downthumbed me?*sob* Would you believe I was using the sarcasm font? no? How about now?
          But what if it’s a *pulls Fang card* fact o’ life? Ok now you look pissed…delete! DELETE!

          • It’s NOT a fact of life!

            We will discuss this on Twitter. ;)

            I feel like your mother. hahaha.

          • Seriously. I’m going on twitter now to discuss too. SDC to an inappropriate level.

      • @ILWL..”.I’m so glad I have people in my life who are willing to put up with a person who has neither looks nor personality”I THUMBDOWNED YOU AND YOU KNOW I HARDLY EVER DO THAT…BUT AFTER READING THAT COMMENT YOU DESERVE IT!!! CAN YOU TELL I AM YELLING AT YOU IN A REALLY LOUD ANGRY VOICE!!!! YOU THINK FANG IS FIERCE??? YOU HAVEN’T SEEN ME REALLY REALLY UPSET….TAKE WHAT U SAID BACK OR IMMA COMIN TO NZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

        • I’m sorry I’m sorry…I take it back! Let me explain though…I felt really bad for saying that I was prettier than Tay’s ex (cause I’ve NEVER done that before and I dont know what came over me and I think its cause he looked so good and for once he wasnt with a chick who was waaaay beyond my level and I’m sorry ) so I had to add a self-deprecating comment about myself as a sort of weird penance…Yeah not the greatest idea…but I’m weird like that…

          Again..sorry and yes I take it back AALLL of it…even the comments i made about her… *hangs head in shame*

          • You are forgiven of course cause I luvs you! Seriously, tho plz do not put yourself down, it does upset me. Your personality, your face/smile and your HUGE heart etc., are incredible and it would be funny if you only said it once in a very great while..but I don’t think you realize how often you do say SDC’s…your too good for that..I don’t mean to preach…but I kinda have to in this case cause I care about you…btw..your fiancee is one lucky guy and TL is missing out on the bestest BFF EVER!!! <3 X10,000

          • *draws cross over heart* I’ll try and tone it down with the SDC’s..I dont EVER want to make u or anyone upset…I’ve been trying really hard to stop talking bad about myself but I think my own comment set me off…after i said i was pretty, the first thing i thought was omg..ppl are gonna say “pfffft…she WISHES she looks as good as her…the vain wretch”…yeah I overthink like Ca-razy! I hope u understand why I do what I do…again…weird…I know… : )
            I <3 ya sooooo much! :)

  5. Comment #1: Big Daddy L and The Shocker are two things that should never been said in the same sentance. Thanks for the visual, Moon.

    Comment #2: Jumbo’s Clown Room….ok, I have no comment. (and yes, I “looked it up”) .

    Comment #3: Chocolate lasagna? Is this a real thing? And if so, and more importantly, where can a girl get some o’ that?!

    Comment #4: LTT: Where You’re Family. Best sign-off … now I wanna go watch that Cheers Theme LTT Family vid from last summer!

    Comment #5: great post ladies. :-)

    • “Big Daddy L and The Shocker are two things that should never been said in the same sentance.” <– I love you for this.

      • THANK YOU! I read “shocker” and went (really loudly too), “EW! No! EW EW EW EW EW EW!” then I had to walk away for a second. So unnecessary, moon.

  6. Okay, this picture alone is almost a post in itself. Big Daddy appears to be supervising his 17 (almost 18!) year old son on a date with a tranny. That’s almost enough right there.

    Think of how these pictures/moments would go to waste if it weren’t for LTT! Thank you, Moon and UC, for giving them their due honor on here.

    • P.S. that post came off kind of sarcastic-y in a bad way, but my intentions were honorable. This is what happens when I comment before I drink my morning coffee! (Which today was at 3:30pm.)

  7. Omg that is a terrible picture of his ex… I literally thought first that that was his mother.

    • I’m clearly not down with the kids because I have no idea who that girl is!
      Doesn’t she look way older than he is?

      • lol They used to date on and off… she came to visit Taylor in Vancouver at one point this summer and I remember seeing a way better (youthful) picture of her but that was only after I just googled her and realized that they were the same person!

      • I have no business commenting here, since I’m a robophile, but yes she does look a lot older than Tay.

  8. On a side note, I love me some Tay, but I’m pretty sure that my sister owns the shirt that he is wearing.

  9. lovin the cute and super hot taylor, but rob is still my kind o man ;)
    note the pics of him in the video were mostly blurry and general bad shots… he has some amazing ones out there too!

  10. omg…. did you get that vid from when i sent you that “gift?” or did you have that drafted and we are just THAT much twinners!? LOVE IT

  11. I just want to say that I am so, so happy that Big Daddy is back. I was starting to miss him… getting the shakes and everything.

    • Ikr? He shouldnt deprive us for so long…I mean I’m starting to have…feelings *shudder* for his slightly-less-attractive progeny. God forbid, we cheat on that manly man with Underage ass…God. for-bid.
      Moar Pappz pics!!! Disrespect the Big Daddy I say!!!! …he’ll love it.

  12. Um, did Taylor and Sara switch shirts or something? I know the boy has some nice pecs, and I love him for it (oh, do I!). But they look sort of…breasty in that shirt.

    He should avoid such instances by just never wearing shirts.

    • I do believe you are a fashion genius.

  13. What happened to Sara? I’ve seen pictures of her before and she was very pretty. Is all Taylor’s flip-flopping back and forth to her wearing her out? We start with Sara, date Selena, back to Sara, on to Swifty, now back to Sara AGAIN? No wonder the poor girl looks….hard. Is it just me or does she bear a striking resemblance to Taylor’s counterpart Marianna?

  14. PLEASE go check your FB page! I posted a pic of Jackward :P

  15. I’m late to read today, but YOU REFERENCED THE SHOCKER! LMAO!!! Oh, Moon, I love you. And get a webcam, dammit. ;)

  16. When I first saw those pictures of him on another website earlier, my jaw literally fell open and I had to pick it up off the desk. HOT DAMN HE IS LOOKING FINE.

  17. http://cdn.buzznet.com/media/jj1//2009/07/lautner-hicks/taylor-lautner-sara-hicks-10.jpg

    Zoom in on this picture!
    ..It is safe, admittedly she looks far far better on this one than the one above.
    She’s wearing a Bella bracelet! :’)

  18. [...] FOR REALS?! Besides the fact that Taylor obviously reads LTT and obviously has great taste in economically-priced-mall-adjacent Italian restaurants,  if some [...]

  19. [...] Santa Monica Ave looking for some real life prostitution experience? Has she been stripping at Jumbos Clown Room but donating her earnings to a Haitian relief fund? I don’t know. Maybe. Why don’t we [...]

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